Wow, never thought it'd be this difficult!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,138
Curley Joe, maybe rereading your first post will help? You wrote:
"I quit for a few months at a time & as soon as I'd have a few drinks for a day or 2, the symptoms & withdrawal would start up all over again."
I agree with Sapling; you should see your doctor if you're concerned. And maybe consider getting a different counselor. Anyone who tells someone who drank daily for 42 years that they can have "just one"...
"I quit for a few months at a time & as soon as I'd have a few drinks for a day or 2, the symptoms & withdrawal would start up all over again."
I agree with Sapling; you should see your doctor if you're concerned. And maybe consider getting a different counselor. Anyone who tells someone who drank daily for 42 years that they can have "just one"...
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: The Mile High City
Posts: 27
Welcome CurleyJoe! I have just found SR and it has helped me in ways I can't describe. I just went through withdrawals that I thought would kill me, but I made it through. I am 6 days sober and plan to keep sober.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 9
Thx Deserto for pointing out re-reading my first post from January. I never had any medical issues to speak of so this is a first for me & a struggle I never anticipated.
I drank for years to control my anxiety which runs in my family - both parents, my 3-sisters & 2 of my 3-children. Over the last couple years, my mom & 2-close friends passed away, we had to put our family dog down [my best friend] and my wife & I went through terrible financial losses and had to sell our home. This caused me to drink more & then the anxiety completely took over and depression as well. I hid things very well, even at work and only my wife had any clue as to what was going on as I could not hide it from her any longer. I am now into this "situation for 15-months since I stopped drinking for 6-months at that time. Since then I let my guard down a few times to have 1-2 drinks, thinking it would be OK [it was a psychologist who told me a drink once in awhile would be OK as long as I limited it to 2]. Each time it seems even with one drink after a month or 2 seems to start the withdrawal cycle all over again -which in itself is pretty miserable and seems to take several weeks to subside largely [although I think I'll always have some degree of anxiety issues].
Have any of you ever experienced this type of anxiety/depression a day or 2 later after having a drink after being sober for weeks or months? [it is like the worst hangover ever that lasts for weeks]. If I am that sensitive to it or should I say suceptible then it makes me more nervous than ever to even think about having a drink again in the future.
So far I've been researching & reading & my trial & error has resulted in too many painful errors so far. Will try to follow all the helpful advice from you here on this panel.
I drank for years to control my anxiety which runs in my family - both parents, my 3-sisters & 2 of my 3-children. Over the last couple years, my mom & 2-close friends passed away, we had to put our family dog down [my best friend] and my wife & I went through terrible financial losses and had to sell our home. This caused me to drink more & then the anxiety completely took over and depression as well. I hid things very well, even at work and only my wife had any clue as to what was going on as I could not hide it from her any longer. I am now into this "situation for 15-months since I stopped drinking for 6-months at that time. Since then I let my guard down a few times to have 1-2 drinks, thinking it would be OK [it was a psychologist who told me a drink once in awhile would be OK as long as I limited it to 2]. Each time it seems even with one drink after a month or 2 seems to start the withdrawal cycle all over again -which in itself is pretty miserable and seems to take several weeks to subside largely [although I think I'll always have some degree of anxiety issues].
Have any of you ever experienced this type of anxiety/depression a day or 2 later after having a drink after being sober for weeks or months? [it is like the worst hangover ever that lasts for weeks]. If I am that sensitive to it or should I say suceptible then it makes me more nervous than ever to even think about having a drink again in the future.
So far I've been researching & reading & my trial & error has resulted in too many painful errors so far. Will try to follow all the helpful advice from you here on this panel.
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
I'm speaking for myself here curleyjoe...I drank a long time...Like you...35 years...I suffered from extreme anxiety and depression my last couple years...It was alcohol driven...Once I got into AA...Worked the steps...Got alcohol out of my life and got myself spiritually fit...I don't suffer from either of those anymore...This is my case...Some people need medication for that...I didn't. I take zero medication now and I'm happier than I've been...Since I was a child. As long as I keep doing what I'm doing..Every day...I plan on staying that way. How is your daughter with the 4 years in AA doing?...Is she happy?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 9
Yes Sapling, my daughter has been clean & sober for 4-years and is a different person & we're very proud of her. At one time I kept expecting a ph call to hear she'd died. At some point she reached bottom & suddenly moved from San Francisco to L.A. She left all her old friends & her old life behind her & hasn;t looked back. She is a counselor at AA and speaks often and goes to meetings constantly even when visiting us. I do talk to her a bit about my own situation, but do not want to involve her directly as her father with my own struggles. I try to use her as an example and have heard her say often enough it s up to the person to make the final decision as to what they want their life to be. Thanks so much for your response as I appreciate each and every one I get.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 9
Hey out there - need a bit of feedback. I'm 58 & drank for years to deal with acute anxiety before clinical depression due to financial problems and quit drinking 1 year ago.
Here's the thing though. MY anxiety is better, but I go through periods of feeling miserable still. I hide it very well from others but feel shaky inside and worn out for hours at a time and sometimes this lasts for days in a row - as with right now for almost the last 2-weeks. I feel a lot of tension & stress and at times feel worn out and get emotional over minor stressful issues. I exercise all the time and look very healthy, but last week starting crying when my wife was not around [she is great]. I do not want to complain and a psychologist who cost a lot earlier this year was of no help. I take a 1/2 xanax about once every other week for anxiety in social circumstances & don;t know if as a recovering alcoholic I should take this. What concerns me is how long I've stopped drinking & just how ****** I can still feel. Tonite like many nights I look forward to just going to sleep hoping tomorrow will be better. Is this all part of quitting drinking or a combination of the anxiety and stopping all alcohol? I thought after a few months & I'd be fine & I was for awhile & now the last month it has started up all over again. I told my wife tonight that I never felt this miserable when drinking & am starting to wonder if that is the only way I can feel "normal". I can now go days or weeks without wanting a drink, but feeling like crap is really wearing me down. Anyone relate or give me any advice out there??
Here's the thing though. MY anxiety is better, but I go through periods of feeling miserable still. I hide it very well from others but feel shaky inside and worn out for hours at a time and sometimes this lasts for days in a row - as with right now for almost the last 2-weeks. I feel a lot of tension & stress and at times feel worn out and get emotional over minor stressful issues. I exercise all the time and look very healthy, but last week starting crying when my wife was not around [she is great]. I do not want to complain and a psychologist who cost a lot earlier this year was of no help. I take a 1/2 xanax about once every other week for anxiety in social circumstances & don;t know if as a recovering alcoholic I should take this. What concerns me is how long I've stopped drinking & just how ****** I can still feel. Tonite like many nights I look forward to just going to sleep hoping tomorrow will be better. Is this all part of quitting drinking or a combination of the anxiety and stopping all alcohol? I thought after a few months & I'd be fine & I was for awhile & now the last month it has started up all over again. I told my wife tonight that I never felt this miserable when drinking & am starting to wonder if that is the only way I can feel "normal". I can now go days or weeks without wanting a drink, but feeling like crap is really wearing me down. Anyone relate or give me any advice out there??
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
Hi CurleyJoe
It took me several months to find a kind of emotional equilibrium, but as I'd been drinking for years I expected that
I think if you have anxiety problems, and they're ongoing or recurring months after you quit, and it'[s concerning you, it might be best to consider you need some help.
One counsellor may not have been the right fit for you, but there are others...Your regular Dr might be a good first stop, especially if they prescribed the Xanax - you can ask them about that too
D
It took me several months to find a kind of emotional equilibrium, but as I'd been drinking for years I expected that
I think if you have anxiety problems, and they're ongoing or recurring months after you quit, and it'[s concerning you, it might be best to consider you need some help.
One counsellor may not have been the right fit for you, but there are others...Your regular Dr might be a good first stop, especially if they prescribed the Xanax - you can ask them about that too
D
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 1,193
As far as therapists go.... Shop around!! I have anxiety and depression issues and have tried quite a few therapists and have only really loved one (and another one was okay/pretty good). In my experience it takes time and trial and error to find the right match that works for you. Of course you have to also be really honest with them too. Best wishes and congrats on your sobriety up to this point.
Life Health Prosperity
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Louisana
Posts: 6,752
Curlyjoe I'm 58 and used for 42 years as well. I'm now 2 years 1 month sober, 11 months no crack, and 2 months 10 days no cigarettes. Truth is I'm more screwed up than I have ever been. On the bright side I have 3 less problems than before. 
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,336
I would make a list of questions and take it with you to a doctors appointment. I find if I take some time in putting together a comprehensive list, it make the appointment much more productive. It sounds like your family has anxiety issues. A good doctor, with experience in those area, can help you....especially if you're totally honest. Best of luck - hoping for a good update
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 9
Thanks for the responses everyone & I actually felt a little better today. We watched our grandson today & I love the little guy so much I always feel better on those days. Pondlady was right as anxiety issues run throughout my family. I actually quit drinking 7-months prior to a year ago, but occasionally had a couple of beers or glasses of wine prior to stopping altogether year ago.
What happened was within a day or 2 my withdrawal symptoms would start up all over again for a period of days up to a week or 2 - which is why I'm suspecting the xanax has something to do with my "on again -off again" mood swings & stress symptoms. BTW - the psychologist I saw told me it would be OK to have an occasional drink and that advice did not work at all for me [not blaming them, just wondering why they would offer that advice?]. Anyway haven;t been to Dr. for a check-up in 4-yrs., so making an appt & seeing if I can substitute something else for the xanax. Sure appreciated your feedback all.
What happened was within a day or 2 my withdrawal symptoms would start up all over again for a period of days up to a week or 2 - which is why I'm suspecting the xanax has something to do with my "on again -off again" mood swings & stress symptoms. BTW - the psychologist I saw told me it would be OK to have an occasional drink and that advice did not work at all for me [not blaming them, just wondering why they would offer that advice?]. Anyway haven;t been to Dr. for a check-up in 4-yrs., so making an appt & seeing if I can substitute something else for the xanax. Sure appreciated your feedback all.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Southeast US
Posts: 332
Congratulations on your decision to get sober and thanks for sharing your story with us. It looks like you've got the right outlook going into this process - - it won't always be easy, but it doesn't take long before you begin to reap the benefits of sobriety. They are pluses that you can see and feel, even on those tough days!
Stay here with us as you make your way through your journey to sobriety. Welcome to SR!
Stay here with us as you make your way through your journey to sobriety. Welcome to SR!
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: SAN FRANCISCO
Posts: 1,176
Hi there,
I too suffer from depression and anxiety and when I am drinking my problems seem to go away for a bit but then the next day they come back worse than before. My Dr. calls it rebound anxiety, and then of course you want to drink more to see if you can make it go away. It's a horrible cycle. Now you're coping with plain old anxiety without the crutch of alcohol.
Have you looked into any relaxation techniques? I use meditation, I think my Mom has some tapes she listens to. Deep breathing exercises, things of that nature. Maybe some relaxing music would help. Get some books on stress management and read them.
I am currently going through a rough patch after breaking up with a boyfriend so I've been taking Klonopin here and there on an as needed basis. I'm also on Zoloft which is an anti-depressant. I'd rather be on these drugs than drinking right now
Hope you feel better soon
I too suffer from depression and anxiety and when I am drinking my problems seem to go away for a bit but then the next day they come back worse than before. My Dr. calls it rebound anxiety, and then of course you want to drink more to see if you can make it go away. It's a horrible cycle. Now you're coping with plain old anxiety without the crutch of alcohol.
Have you looked into any relaxation techniques? I use meditation, I think my Mom has some tapes she listens to. Deep breathing exercises, things of that nature. Maybe some relaxing music would help. Get some books on stress management and read them.
I am currently going through a rough patch after breaking up with a boyfriend so I've been taking Klonopin here and there on an as needed basis. I'm also on Zoloft which is an anti-depressant. I'd rather be on these drugs than drinking right now
Hope you feel better soon
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 9
Hi ZiggyB & thx again - I swear your post sounded like my wife wrote it word for word. So yes I try meditation, deep breathing & all that and mostly it doesn;t work in crowded social situations [crowded enclosed rooms, etc.]. I've also noticed its worse at night than say the morning or afternoon. The one things that seems to keep it in check somewhat is working out for extended periods prior to an event I'm getting anxiety over going to. If I tire myself out sufficiently I can sometimes cope with it - though still somewhat uncomfortable. Good advice from you just the same.
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