donc99

Hello all,

After 29 years of drinking, at the age of 45, I stopped drinking in April 2011.

So far I've maintained my sobriety through stubbornness, with a target of staying sober until the end of the year. Now that's close, I'm feeling insecure about the whole thing. I'm enjoying being sober, feel better, but do I always have to fight like this? When can it become natural?

Zebra1275

If you are an alcoholic with 29 years of drinking experience I doubt if it is going to feel natural, especially after only 8 months of sobriety. Don't get me wrong, 8 months is great! However, I say "only" 8 months because you drank for 29 years which is 348 months. The scales aren't quite balanced yet.

What I've found is that getting sober is only part of the recovery solution. I had to make some other behavior changes and attitude adjustments to maintain my sobriety.

CaiHong

Hi Donc99,

I don't quite understand, you say that you enjoy being sober, does that mean you have no strong cravings to drink or that you are happy being sober but still are fighting the cravings tooth and nail, if it is the later you may need to look at different programs to help you stay and enjoy your sobriety.
I am coming up to 7 months sober and am in a weird space of, "well what now?" Something I need to investigate.

Good on you for the 8 months.
CaiHong

donc99

I'm enjoying the benefits of being sober, no hangovers, more positive outlook, improved moods.
The cravings come on mainly at weekends for me. I was never a daily heavy drinker, just a huge binge drinker when work was over on a Friday.

"Well, what now?" is where I'm at too

Dee74

Hi donc - congratulations on your sober time & welcome to SR

I don't know exactly what you've been doing but I found I had to do more than just put down the drink to be happy.

I had a lot of underlying issues that led me to drinking in the first place - with the alcohol gone I had to start working on those issues, and make a few changes in my life and my thinking in order to be happy and content with my new life.

Have you made any changes besides just not drinking?

D

donc99

Hi D,

Thanks for the welcome

I've not really changed anything to be honest, just been avoiding drink. I know I need to change, low self esteem for example was on think that always led me to drink. Just not sure where to start in improving this

jocata

Like others have posted, just putting down the drink is not enough. We have to change are way of thinking. Programs like AA and the twelve steps will do that for you. It is said that drinking is just a symptom of deeper issues that we have. I have low self esteem also. Alcohol made me feel better about myself, for awhile. That stopped working when I crossed that line into addiction. Try some meetings out, and I don't mean just one or two. Try it for a couple of months. Share what you are feeling with others, meet some people who have quality sobriety. Ask them what they do. Best wishes.
God bless.