langkah

Good you're back and doing a few new things and a tiny bit of the old things.

onlythetruth

You are a beautiful writer, Natalie, and you've captured the essence of what happened to me after I quit drinking. For me, it didn't happen the same way and it didn't happen quickly, but I too came to realize that who I am has little to do with the roles I've taken on in life and absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I was once addicted to alcohol.

It's an important realization.

Pigtails

Thank you for sharing. I really like the way you write, it's gripping and haunting. I keep hearing that it gets harder every time one relapses. This is a good reminder for me. I wish you well in your continued recovery.

Healthyfood

I agree that staying sober is easier than getting through first 2-3 days without a drink.

manunited

well done great to hear your back on track

soberlicious

Natalie,
Thanks so much for sharing. I, too, drank again after 10 years of not drinking. That bender lasted 7 years. Your journey has been much like mine. The roles, the labels...some I created for myself, others were projected onto me. Some I accepted, some I rejected. I am all of them, yet none of them...lol anyway, look forward to reading more from you.

Freeport

So glad I visited forum and saw your posts, Natalie. On the cusp of holidays where I'll be surrounded by booze, and I realize after reading here that I probably wasn't mentally prepared. Becoming complacent, and it's only been 2-1/2 years of sobriety for me. Thank you for sharing and happy holidays to you.

Hevyn

Natalie, We're so glad you're back among the living & have joined our family. Thank you for the eloquently expressed insight. I, too, fell back into drinking after 3 yrs. sober. Took me 7 yrs. to put the pieces back together. Never again.

NatalieN

Glad to see many of you identify with parts of my story.

Onlythetruth I am glad we had the same realization. Life does get better once we have this experience. Not life, but our reactions to its event. Pigtails i appreciate your comment. I hear ya soberlicious.

Today I’ve been sober for 13 days. My life situation, especially at home with 27 year old daughter, it’s not idyllic. Remaining aware of negative thoughts before they turn into feelings and actions is crucial for me.

I am not able to do this with all thoughts. Quite a few go on to become full blown emotional suffering. When this happens, I sit with the discomfort for however long it takes to leave my body, usually a couple of minutes if I bring enough awareness to it.

Met a good friend at an AA meeting today. She left me thinking yesterday when she asked me why couldn’t I treat AA meetings the same way I treat life, taking what works and ignoring the rest. I felt some discomfort when the meeting closed with a particular prayer, but it was a good speaker meeting, lots of new, fresh faces since my last meeting 2 years ago. The faces keep getting younger and younger.



Natalie