Long Day -I must be crazy
Long Day -I must be crazy
Just about every negative thought has gone through my head.. I mean even down to the fact that I really do not enjoy purple ties and that I resent people who wear them (joke, really do not but you get the point). Anyway went out for my 5th walk contemplating my life, all of my mistakes and none of my triumphs. Though about a career change, moving, not having any money (right now) I always seem to forget that I end up doing fine.. It takes a huge shift in my life to get my attention and for me to calm down it seems.. when everything is ok or seemingly I go about my drunkin business partying away and then repent when I run out of money or booz or usually both.. What an endless cycle.. unreal.. So all is well when you live by the sword .. but never well when you die by it right.. So after tormenting myself trying to tempt myself into not again facing my problems and drowning out my sorrows UNTIL I SOBER UP. Tonight I am going to make dinner.. write down my successes.. smoke 20 cigs.. and formulate a plan.. Sorry just Sick and Tired of being sick and tired and questioning my entire life every year.. Wonder if anyone can relate or am I just bats*&t crazy? Thanks for listening.. Hope everyone else is doing well.
I did a lot of endless worrying and hand wringing when I was drinking and immediately after...
I had what they call 'analysis paralysis'....a little bit of counselling helped me to get past that....would you consider that Ed?
D
I had what they call 'analysis paralysis'....a little bit of counselling helped me to get past that....would you consider that Ed?
D
Ed, I don't mean to minimalize, but maybe you are just having a bad day. Getting sober is hard to do and really plays with your head. Also, I have learned that even down the road that sober does not equal automatic perfect life. (Ofcourse drinking equals automatic loser life.)
Eat something good and listen to some music, maybe? You will feel better later on, as long as you don't drink.
Eat something good and listen to some music, maybe? You will feel better later on, as long as you don't drink.
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