violetflame

Hello All,
Well I am proud of myself... I would like to say. Yesterday was hard. I told my daughter I was not feeling well when I got home(which i wasn't) was extremely tired and nausious. But she kept on asking me to go out and get her something sweet because she was PMSing so instead of yelling at her I just calmly told her I wasn't feeling well enough to go out again. Of course I was also afraid I would end up buying wine if I went out again. Just made me remember how I used to yell and scream for the most irrational things and overreact when I was hung over or drinking. I am going to make sure I have healthy snacks and meals in the house so I will avoid the trap of going out and ending up buying wine. I feel like there is finally hope and I can do this. I guess I just have to get my butt to a meating to make me stronger. I have also been having a lot of headaches and general tiredness. I attribute this to withdrawal. Also, I was told that Naltrexone may be causing me depression. But I am afraid to stop it becasue psychologically it is making the idea of drinking seem less appealing. So I am just going to exercise more and suck it up. It's not as if I am suicidal or anything. I feel for the 1st time in a long time, I can actually do this

StreamWader

Hello Violet

So good to see you posting. Stay strong, I am quite sure there are good things waiting for you, just over the horizon.

Dee74

Glad to hear you're feeling positive Violet

I'm guessing you just started the naltrexone - probably best to give it some time...but I'd check with your Dr if you continue to think your meds are making you depressed...

D

version2

Good job Violet. One day at a time. I am in the airport right now. Would normally be hanging out in the bar but not today. A small victory but I am proud of that.

Tigger41

You should be very proud of 5 days. During my first week I was tired and had a bunch of headaches - especially starting around dinner time (which is when I usually started drinking). I'm sure it will get better - do whatever you have to so that you stay sober.

Great job!

violetflame

Well ,I didn't make it. Back on day 1 again. Naltrexone is making me very dizzy and have to disconinue it. Was feeling peaceful however, i ended up blowing it and now have to start again. I was 2 hours late to work today and all I had was 3 glasses of wine last night. I was AF Friday and Satruday night so I guess my body was upset and gave me a hangover as though I had drank twice as much. I don't know why something just clicks and becomes stronger than me. It has a lot to do with boredomw and loneliness and a lack of purpose. I need to start socializing more and writing and just doing positive things because I really don't want to go down that spiral again.

Dee74

I found all those things were factors in my drinking but they weren't reasons - the reason I drank was because I was addicted.

I'm sorry the naltrexone didn't work out but meds wouldn't have worked with me...I'd just not take them after a while.

The real issue was me and why I wanted to change my reality all the time.

I think supports important in helping us change that and stay that way - have you thought about real life support as well VF?

D

Dee74

I found all those things were factors in my drinking but they weren't reasons - the reason I drank was because I was addicted.

I'm sorry the naltrexone didn't work out but meds wouldn't have worked with me...I'd just not take them after a while.

The real issue was me and why I wanted to change my reality all the time.

I think supports important in helping us change that and stay that way - have you thought about real life support as well VF?

D