2 months, but struggling as of this week
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Fort Lauderdale. FL
Posts: 2
2 months, but struggling as of this week
Hello folks,
I'm new here, but have stopped by for a look over the years. I suppose this means I've known I am a problem drinker for years. So, I have questions that I'll present at the bottom of this post, but first, I'll line item my boozing history.
I'm a 46 year old male
I started getting staggering drunk at roughly 20
Married 20 years, we both got smashed and fought
3 DUIs in 3 different states prior to 1988
Countless blackouts, fights and broken relationships
Accidents have left their scars
I'm sure most of you can fill in the details of the insanity outlined in my history. I drank on Friday and Saturday to the tune of about 10-12 heavy beers. I woke/wake up every Monday morning and go back to my successful life in corporate America.
To My Question:
I've quit for a year in the past, but I was younger and dumber (hopefully). I started this attempt in March and fell back for a weekend in early August. So, I'm two months clean and am struggling this week wanted to waste time and my health by turning my mind off with booze.
It has been so long since I was dry for long and I'm wondering if the urge to pitch sobriety and go back to what I know is killing me will subside in ?? months. Will this craving/desire to go back to wild binge drinking diminish after a while?
Thanks!
I'm new here, but have stopped by for a look over the years. I suppose this means I've known I am a problem drinker for years. So, I have questions that I'll present at the bottom of this post, but first, I'll line item my boozing history.
I'm a 46 year old male
I started getting staggering drunk at roughly 20
Married 20 years, we both got smashed and fought
3 DUIs in 3 different states prior to 1988
Countless blackouts, fights and broken relationships
Accidents have left their scars
I'm sure most of you can fill in the details of the insanity outlined in my history. I drank on Friday and Saturday to the tune of about 10-12 heavy beers. I woke/wake up every Monday morning and go back to my successful life in corporate America.
To My Question:
I've quit for a year in the past, but I was younger and dumber (hopefully). I started this attempt in March and fell back for a weekend in early August. So, I'm two months clean and am struggling this week wanted to waste time and my health by turning my mind off with booze.
It has been so long since I was dry for long and I'm wondering if the urge to pitch sobriety and go back to what I know is killing me will subside in ?? months. Will this craving/desire to go back to wild binge drinking diminish after a while?
Thanks!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,514
Hi,
Welcome to SR!
I think it depends what changes you have made in your life, besides stopping drinking. Alcoholism is a symptom and we have to deal with the underlying issues in our lives that caused us to drink. That's what recovery is about.
Welcome to SR!
I think it depends what changes you have made in your life, besides stopping drinking. Alcoholism is a symptom and we have to deal with the underlying issues in our lives that caused us to drink. That's what recovery is about.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Welcome duosonic
I had to do more than just not drinking to stay sober - for one thing my life revolved around drinking, so I had a lot of changes to make there - not only in the palces I hung out, but who I hung out with and what I did with my time.
I also had to look at what I was drinking for. I dunno about you but I had a lot of underlying factors that drove me to drinking in the first palce - I needed to finally confront and deal with those.
I also needed to admit I need help and support. I don't think there's many of us who can do this alone.
In a nutshell, I think the aim is not only to stop drinking, but rather to stop drinking - and to be happy and at peace with that decision.
If I'm happy with my life, why would I want to go back?
You'll find a lot of support and ideas here - welcome
D
I had to do more than just not drinking to stay sober - for one thing my life revolved around drinking, so I had a lot of changes to make there - not only in the palces I hung out, but who I hung out with and what I did with my time.
I also had to look at what I was drinking for. I dunno about you but I had a lot of underlying factors that drove me to drinking in the first palce - I needed to finally confront and deal with those.
I also needed to admit I need help and support. I don't think there's many of us who can do this alone.
In a nutshell, I think the aim is not only to stop drinking, but rather to stop drinking - and to be happy and at peace with that decision.
If I'm happy with my life, why would I want to go back?
You'll find a lot of support and ideas here - welcome
D
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
Drinking was my solution until it didn't work anymore. I work the 12 steps and they saved my life. I don't know if they'll work for you, I'm an alcoholic who had no hope & was desperate 5 months ago. Cravings are fleeting thoughts today, and I'm usually too engaged in the moment to focus on them.
Welcome to SR!
Welcome to SR!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: New York
Posts: 35,731
Welcome Duosonic! I can honestly say my cravings are gone and alcohol no longer controls me. I control me . That being said...I did have some work to do on myself and some issues to resolve before that happened. It was all worth it. Give yourself a chance...you can do this and the cravings will subside...if you do the work.
Best Wishes To You!
That being said...I did have some work to do on myself and some issues to resolve before that happened. It was all worth it. Give yourself a chance...you can do this and the cravings will subside...if you do the work. Best Wishes To You!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,574
Hi Duosonic - so glad you're here. You aren't alone, most of us have similar drinking histories. I sure do - and I went on into my 50's still trying to control my drinking. I'm glad you're taking a cold, hard look at what you're doing to yourself.
I had to admit that it was no longer fun or a break from everyday life. I had 3 dui's, ruined relationships, had made a fool of myself at work, health issues. My thinking was foggy, I was getting sloppy - I couldn't keep up the charade any longer. I finally realized it was too much trouble, and too dangerous, to continue on the way I was. My life was at stake, and I wasn't ready to check out.
My cravings definitely did subside - but it took a few months. We go through many phases as we get well. I hope you'll be patient and ride out the rough spots. It'll be so worth it. Life can be filled with hope and joy again, we promise.
I had to admit that it was no longer fun or a break from everyday life. I had 3 dui's, ruined relationships, had made a fool of myself at work, health issues. My thinking was foggy, I was getting sloppy - I couldn't keep up the charade any longer. I finally realized it was too much trouble, and too dangerous, to continue on the way I was. My life was at stake, and I wasn't ready to check out.
My cravings definitely did subside - but it took a few months. We go through many phases as we get well. I hope you'll be patient and ride out the rough spots. It'll be so worth it. Life can be filled with hope and joy again, we promise.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 17
I'm really not qualified to answer your questions, since i've not been sober but 6 weeks or so. And a couple of months is the longest I have been on the wagon since I started binge drinking 6 or 7 years ago. I have noticed that I don't crave alcohol all of the time. And it seems that I'm craving it less and less often with time. Today has been one of the most tempting days I've had so far.. I was entertaining the idea that I could probably handle drinking in moderation ..occassionally. Ha!
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome Duosonic!
It really does get better as time goes on..... Those urges still pop up for me from time to time, but since I spent years drinking and I'm an alcoholic, I expect them to and try to take it in stride.
Glad you've decided to join us!
It really does get better as time goes on..... Those urges still pop up for me from time to time, but since I spent years drinking and I'm an alcoholic, I expect them to and try to take it in stride.
Glad you've decided to join us!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Twin Cities MN
Posts: 83
Getting through the weekend....
(wow, that has a nice ring to it - I should start a recovery blog this weekend and title the first entry that. Thanks for the inspiration!)
Well, the best advice I've gotten that I like to repeat is: weather permitting, go outside! Preferably, out to someplace in nature. Spending time out in the sun, or at least daylight if it's cloudy, getting "fresh air" (at least circulating air if you're in the city instead of nature), and moving about does wonderful things for your mental, emotional, and physical health. My own experience has been this: hours fly by while I walk around outside, just wandering about. Nothing brings me inner peace like hearing the birdcalls or sitting and watching the squirrles for hours in my local parks. If you like to read, bring a book with! Oh, and if you do, my recommendation there is bring one you've already read, enjoyed, but didn't really get that deep into. Reading outside can really change your perspective, and you'll probably pick up on things in the book that you missed before
Also, I don't know if you have anyplace like this where you live, or if you're gregarious enough to even want to do this, but find a restaurant/place where they have board games/video games available to either just use or to rent while you eat your food. The place here in the twin cites is called the Chatterbox, and they've got an awesome assortment: board games like monopoly, battleship, pictionary, etc, as well as a couple of old nintendos and super nintendos set up with dozens of oldschool games available. You can even go there alone and almost always find someone there also on their own looking for someone to compete with while eating their BLT and fries,
Then, there's always writing online. Browsing the 15+ forums here on SR is guaranteed to eat up an afternoon. Especially if you find a few posts that inspire you to write and share like you just did with your first post above. The newcommer's thread is a great launching pad, but now would be a great time to go check out the alcoholic board, or the men's only board!
No matter what, CONGRATS on your 2 months!!!!!
Take care,
zenjen
(wow, that has a nice ring to it - I should start a recovery blog this weekend and title the first entry that. Thanks for the inspiration!)
Well, the best advice I've gotten that I like to repeat is: weather permitting, go outside! Preferably, out to someplace in nature. Spending time out in the sun, or at least daylight if it's cloudy, getting "fresh air" (at least circulating air if you're in the city instead of nature), and moving about does wonderful things for your mental, emotional, and physical health. My own experience has been this: hours fly by while I walk around outside, just wandering about. Nothing brings me inner peace like hearing the birdcalls or sitting and watching the squirrles for hours in my local parks. If you like to read, bring a book with! Oh, and if you do, my recommendation there is bring one you've already read, enjoyed, but didn't really get that deep into. Reading outside can really change your perspective, and you'll probably pick up on things in the book that you missed before
Also, I don't know if you have anyplace like this where you live, or if you're gregarious enough to even want to do this, but find a restaurant/place where they have board games/video games available to either just use or to rent while you eat your food. The place here in the twin cites is called the Chatterbox, and they've got an awesome assortment: board games like monopoly, battleship, pictionary, etc, as well as a couple of old nintendos and super nintendos set up with dozens of oldschool games available. You can even go there alone and almost always find someone there also on their own looking for someone to compete with while eating their BLT and fries,
Then, there's always writing online. Browsing the 15+ forums here on SR is guaranteed to eat up an afternoon. Especially if you find a few posts that inspire you to write and share like you just did with your first post above. The newcommer's thread is a great launching pad, but now would be a great time to go check out the alcoholic board, or the men's only board!
No matter what, CONGRATS on your 2 months!!!!!
Take care,
zenjen
SoberOutlook
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 3,089
Duosonic...we have very similar stories and stations in life. I am on day 78 today. I must tell you that you may be at a real precipice that you must just plow through. Your mind is making it's last desparate pleas to continue your addiction. But, I can tell you that the last two weeks, for me, have been increasingly easier. My mind is returning, as is my energy and sense of well-being. The dread and fear of going back to alcohol has eased, and my acceptance of sober life is as well. Please don't give up now! I pray you will have a similar experience, and will post your progress along the way.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Fort Lauderdale. FL
Posts: 2
Made it and had a great weekend!
Originally Posted by LoftyIdeals 
Duosonic...we have very similar stories and stations in life. I am on day 78 today. I must tell you that you may be at a real precipice that you must just plow through. Your mind is making it's last desparate pleas to continue your addiction. But, I can tell you that the last two weeks, for me, have been increasingly easier. My mind is returning, as is my energy and sense of well-being. The dread and fear of going back to alcohol has eased, and my acceptance of sober life is as well. Please don't give up now! I pray you will have a similar experience, and will post your progress along the way.
Thanks to all for the support!
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