Viscious Cycle
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 29
Viscious Cycle
Well for the last 2 and a half years, I've quit drinking several times for about 2-3 months at a time, only to find myself once again only sober for 2 days. I know deep down its not hopeless, but it certainly feels that way right now.
My last spree was a 4 day bender ending Sunday night with me falling off the bed, and my wife unable to get me up. Not my proudest moment. The next day she wasn't even angry, just worried sick about how bad of a state I was in. Saying only, "This has to stop." Of course I was in agreement.
Its a horrible feeling to know you have to go through withdrawal all over again. I think everyone on this site knows what the definition of insanity is.
My last spree was a 4 day bender ending Sunday night with me falling off the bed, and my wife unable to get me up. Not my proudest moment. The next day she wasn't even angry, just worried sick about how bad of a state I was in. Saying only, "This has to stop." Of course I was in agreement.
Its a horrible feeling to know you have to go through withdrawal all over again. I think everyone on this site knows what the definition of insanity is.
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
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Yes, it is absolute insanity, isn't it. But, it's so good that you have hope and believe that you can do this.
When you stop drinking for 2 to 3 months at a time, what other changes do you make in your life?
You might want to check with your dr before you begin to detox because it can be dangerous.
When you stop drinking for 2 to 3 months at a time, what other changes do you make in your life?
You might want to check with your dr before you begin to detox because it can be dangerous.
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 10
Hi Icarus,
I'm in that relapse cycle too & yes it's an insane situation - I'm on day 9 (1/2!) sober and am reading/writing here to keep my resolve strong this time. This is a great site to be on - I found it a great help to post here.
Stay strong!
I'm in that relapse cycle too & yes it's an insane situation - I'm on day 9 (1/2!) sober and am reading/writing here to keep my resolve strong this time. This is a great site to be on - I found it a great help to post here.
Stay strong!
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 29
Originally Posted by Anna 
Yes, it is absolute insanity, isn't it. But, it's so good that you have hope and believe that you can do this.
When you stop drinking for 2 to 3 months at a time, what other changes do you make in your life?
You might want to check with your dr before you begin to detox because it can be dangerous.
When you stop drinking for 2 to 3 months at a time, what other changes do you make in your life?
You might want to check with your dr before you begin to detox because it can be dangerous.
When I'm not drinking I don't make any drastic changes then the not drinking of course. I do try to eat healthy and exercise. I try to spend as much time with my two daughters as possible. Who really should never see their father in the state that I get in.
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Join Date: Apr 2011
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Originally Posted by Tillies
Hi Icarus,
I'm in that relapse cycle too & yes it's an insane situation - I'm on day 9 (1/2!) sober and am reading/writing here to keep my resolve strong this time. This is a great site to be on - I found it a great help to post here.
Stay strong!
I'm in that relapse cycle too & yes it's an insane situation - I'm on day 9 (1/2!) sober and am reading/writing here to keep my resolve strong this time. This is a great site to be on - I found it a great help to post here.
Stay strong!
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,410
Icarus10, I'm in the same boat as you. I relapse every 3 months now. It was every few weeks 2 years ago. I'm on day 7 now and still recovering from my withdrawals. I'm determine to to not relapse again. Here are a few things that may make you slip and drink again. I hope they help.
Many warning signs can tell you when you may be in danger of using drugs or alcohol again. These are some of the signs:
Many warning signs can tell you when you may be in danger of using drugs or alcohol again. These are some of the signs:
Hanging around old drinking haunts and substance-using friends
Cutting yourself off from your support network
Keeping alcohol or drugs at home
Obsessive thinking about using drugs or drinking
Having relationship difficulties
Being involved with someone or having a spouse who still uses
Being bored or lacking routine and structure in your life
Refusing to deal with personal issues and other problems
Feeling like a victim and refusing to acknowledge you have choices and are responsible for your life
Putting yourself in situations in which you must prove to others you don’t have a problem
If you recognize any of these behaviors in yourself, get support and make a commitment to sobriety.
Cutting yourself off from your support network
Keeping alcohol or drugs at home
Obsessive thinking about using drugs or drinking
Having relationship difficulties
Being involved with someone or having a spouse who still uses
Being bored or lacking routine and structure in your life
Refusing to deal with personal issues and other problems
Feeling like a victim and refusing to acknowledge you have choices and are responsible for your life
Putting yourself in situations in which you must prove to others you don’t have a problem
If you recognize any of these behaviors in yourself, get support and make a commitment to sobriety.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 29
Originally Posted by ACT10Npack
Icarus10, I'm in the same boat as you. I relapse every 3 months now. It was every few weeks 2 years ago. I'm on day 7 now and still recovering from my withdrawals. I'm determine to to not relapse again. Here are a few things that may make you slip and drink again. I hope they help.
Many warning signs can tell you when you may be in danger of using drugs or alcohol again. These are some of the signs:
Many warning signs can tell you when you may be in danger of using drugs or alcohol again. These are some of the signs:
Hanging around old drinking haunts and substance-using friends
Cutting yourself off from your support network
Keeping alcohol or drugs at home
Obsessive thinking about using drugs or drinking
Having relationship difficulties
Being involved with someone or having a spouse who still uses
Being bored or lacking routine and structure in your life
Refusing to deal with personal issues and other problems
Feeling like a victim and refusing to acknowledge you have choices and are responsible for your life
Putting yourself in situations in which you must prove to others you don’t have a problem
If you recognize any of these behaviors in yourself, get support and make a commitment to sobriety.
Cutting yourself off from your support network
Keeping alcohol or drugs at home
Obsessive thinking about using drugs or drinking
Having relationship difficulties
Being involved with someone or having a spouse who still uses
Being bored or lacking routine and structure in your life
Refusing to deal with personal issues and other problems
Feeling like a victim and refusing to acknowledge you have choices and are responsible for your life
Putting yourself in situations in which you must prove to others you don’t have a problem
If you recognize any of these behaviors in yourself, get support and make a commitment to sobriety.
Should I be concerned if almost all of the above apply?
Oh well, no one said this was going to be easy.
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,513
The thing is, Icarus, alcohol is the symptom.
Once you remove the alcohol, you still need to deal with the underlying problems that led you to drink and numb yourself. That's when the hard work and tough changes occur. Recovery is an amazing journey!
Once you remove the alcohol, you still need to deal with the underlying problems that led you to drink and numb yourself. That's when the hard work and tough changes occur. Recovery is an amazing journey!
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Welcome Icarus10 
I used to have spells of sobriety too - I really agree with Anna that alcohol was a symptom for me of some deeper malaise.
I needed to not only stop drinking but I needed to look at the reasons behind my drinking too, and make some pretty big changes to my life - not just the tangible ones like cutting out a lot of drinking places I used to go and drinking people I used to be with - but also looking for more purpose and meaning in my life.
SR really helped me to sort out a lot of those kinds of things
I hope we can help you too
D
I used to have spells of sobriety too - I really agree with Anna that alcohol was a symptom for me of some deeper malaise.
I needed to not only stop drinking but I needed to look at the reasons behind my drinking too, and make some pretty big changes to my life - not just the tangible ones like cutting out a lot of drinking places I used to go and drinking people I used to be with - but also looking for more purpose and meaning in my life.
SR really helped me to sort out a lot of those kinds of things
I hope we can help you too
D
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 29
I really have to agree that alcohol is a symptom of a much deeper malaise for me. I'm going to need to go on a long journey of acceptance, and forgiveness. I feel I'm finally at a point in my life where I am ready for surrender, and that I actually know what that means now.
It was a pretty rough night last night, but here I am on Day 3. Here's to hoping I never start this countdown again.
It was a pretty rough night last night, but here I am on Day 3. Here's to hoping I never start this countdown again.
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