EbonyG

Hello im Ebony,

I have been battling for the past year and a half with recovery and have had a few set backs. During this battle i have entered into a new relationship with someone who is also in recovery, for three years he has been in recovery. We both have some fears about the other and it is affecting our relationship. I cannot speak for him but i personally have a very difficult time communicating with him, not because he does not listen, because i am not sure how too. I also have a hard time dealing with some of his issues, though he is working on his also.
Does anyone have any tips for me on how i can communicate and how to be more supportive of him during this difficult time. We both have not been in a relationship in many years and the though of being hurt scares us to death, but we love each other and we are doing all we possibly can.

Any insights or thoughts will help.

Thank you sooo Much.

Mark75

Hi Ebony! Welcome to SR.

My first answer is to just work on your own recovery and issues while he works on his... Just be there for each other. That's all.

But, I also want to recommend that you look into a couple of books by Melody Beatty... I think I got her name right... "Codependent No More" and "Beyond Codependency"... You can get them at Barnes and Noble and on Amazon... Check them out!

Good Luck!!

Mariano

Sorry, my english is not very good. I am afraid I have no great advice, but I would suggest to have a little more confidence. Don't be so afraid. I think that with less fear, the relationship will probably enhance. Comunication abilities may be learnt and trained. Fear hinders communication. A psicologyst may be helpful. To overcome fear, you have to confront it. If a particular situation scares you, don't avoid it, but try to confront it. In doing so, the fear will weaken. Actually is quite simple, but a psycologist may be very helpful.

EbonyG

That is some of the best advice i have been given, thank you so much. God Bless