snoopy1973

Well, on Day 3 my only focus was not stopping to buy a bottle of wine at any point today, but I had a very unexpected challenge. I took the girl's swimming to a new friend's house and while we were sitting on the patio she asked if I wanted a glass of cold chardonnay (my FAVORITE drink in the world) and I said no, although it was hard, then she asked a second time when she was filling up her margarita, and I said no a second time, but it was MUCH harder. I just kept telling myself if if I had that wine there, I would without a doubt stop on the way home (Lord knows I can't have just 1 or 2), buy another bottle, and my night with my kids of playing games would be shot, but I thought about that wine probably every minute or two and I was there for 3 hours, so that was a lot of time focused on it and still focused on it now. I guess my question is, does it get better? I don't want to live my life constantly thinking about alcohol, I feel like I am almost as obsessed now thinking about NOT having it as I was thinking about when I HAD to have it...I feel like I will go CRAZY if I have to live my life this way. Any feedback greatly appreciated...thank you...

least

Yes, it got better for me several months into my sobriety. I started expressing gratitude every day and being grateful for my blessings replaced any thoughts of drinking. Now I rarely think of it and when I do, the thoughts are easily dismissed.

Terminally Unique

Might take a couple months to get to the point where it is really easy to dismiss those thoughts, but yes, it does get easier and easier. That said, the downside is that you may begin to "forget" why you quit in the first place as time goes on and you start feeling better, so you may want to save/print your posts for re-reading in a couple months. :-)

Anna

It will get easier for you as time goes on.

Getting through the tough moments like that will help to make it easier next time.

Dee74

It definitely gets easier - noone would want it to stay like it is on day 3

Have you heard of the technique of playing the tape through to the end Snoopy?

It's easy to look at that glass of chardonnay and salivate...but force yourself to mentally play the tape through to the end and remember where exactly that first glass ultimately takes you....

D

bellakeller

That's where going to a meeting and being with others in the same boat helps me. I get practical advice from those who have been there and can live without alcohol. They show me how to do it, plus it's soothing to be in a room with folks who have gone or who are going through the same unique hell we get to experience in the face of alcohol. It's been helpful to me.

sarah1414

Snoopy, I'm right there with you. At day four today and we went to a family restaurant for dinner. I was thinking I could order a glass of wine. But I know that I'll have to stop on the way home to get more so my husband says no. I thought about it all through dinner. Had some ice cream at home and went for a walk. I'm now feeling better and not obsessing over the drink.

I've been here before and just give in. This is the hardest part; working through addictive thoughts and dismissing them as just that; thoughts. We don't have to act on them. I'm speaking to myself as I type this.

Take care and get through today. "See" you tomorrow!

artsoul

Yes, it gets easier! The obsession will fade, slowly but surely. There were lots of times at first that I just had to hang on (coming here really helped). I had to fast foward through the initial temptation to the next morning, knowing that one drink would lead to waking up in misery. And I'd have to face the temptation to drink again the next day and the next. The only way to get rid of the obsession is not to feed it.

Good for you for choosing sobriety when alcohol was right in front of you. That would have been hard for anyone. Stay positive - it really is a great feeling when you realize one day that you just spent a whole day without thinking about drinking. You'll get there........

Raptor

Hey Snoopy, The common thread from all is that it "gets better over time" This is very true and sound advise. I found that remembering or trying to anycase, what happens after 30 drinks and not 1 drink really helps me NOT take that 1st drink. The desire to "drink" never leaves us, we just learn to controll it! Thats why you need to never forgett the "bad" times because through the passage of time we tend to forgett this feeling and the people who we have hurt the most.

I wish you a long sober life.

KathP

It does get easier! I know that for me I thought that the obsession was never going to leave my mind -- thinking about drinking, thinking about not drinking -- but I kept on gritting my teeth, attending AA meetings, trying to distract myself with mundane everyday things... and suddenly I realised the obsession had been lessening & lessening & hardly noticeable to me any more! I don't know when it went, or where it went, but boy was I glad that it was on its way out!