a change would do me good...
Love, Light & Peace
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Germany
Posts: 50
a change would do me good...
Hi everyone,
I am brand new to the forums; this is my first post. I have had problems with alcohol since high school, and I am now 29 years old. After a bad incident in 2009, I managed four months sober; I want to make a more permanent change and look forward to your advice and support in this new endeavor of mine!
I have been married for five years to a wonderful man who is caring, supportive, sexy, smart; in short, a real catch. I hit bottom in 2009 when, drunk, I made out with someone who wasn't my husband. I hit a deeper bottom Saturday night, when it happened again...although it was even more terrifying since I almost slept with this person, who was a stranger I had just met at the bar that evening. I am glad I stopped, but I am angry at myself since Drunk Me makes decisions that Sober Me finds repulsive.
Not only does my husband not deserve a wife who acts like this, but I don't deserve the heartache and pain I feel in the aftermath of drunken incidents such as these.
There are other bad stories I could share, but these betrayals of my husband are the worst and are the impetus for my joining this forum and investigating AA meetings in my area.
I am especially looking forward to the support of this online community, since I am living on a temporary basis in a foreign country, so access to my regular support systems is limited and my loneliness triggers are increased!
I believe that I am a good person at heart but that alcohol changes that. I want to make a new start for my and my family's sake.
Love, Light & Peace
I am brand new to the forums; this is my first post. I have had problems with alcohol since high school, and I am now 29 years old. After a bad incident in 2009, I managed four months sober; I want to make a more permanent change and look forward to your advice and support in this new endeavor of mine!
I have been married for five years to a wonderful man who is caring, supportive, sexy, smart; in short, a real catch. I hit bottom in 2009 when, drunk, I made out with someone who wasn't my husband. I hit a deeper bottom Saturday night, when it happened again...although it was even more terrifying since I almost slept with this person, who was a stranger I had just met at the bar that evening. I am glad I stopped, but I am angry at myself since Drunk Me makes decisions that Sober Me finds repulsive.
Not only does my husband not deserve a wife who acts like this, but I don't deserve the heartache and pain I feel in the aftermath of drunken incidents such as these.
There are other bad stories I could share, but these betrayals of my husband are the worst and are the impetus for my joining this forum and investigating AA meetings in my area.
I am especially looking forward to the support of this online community, since I am living on a temporary basis in a foreign country, so access to my regular support systems is limited and my loneliness triggers are increased!
I believe that I am a good person at heart but that alcohol changes that. I want to make a new start for my and my family's sake.
Love, Light & Peace
to SR. Glad you are here
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Mi
Posts: 292
Lady - Welcome. You will find some inspirational stories here and a good bit of wisdom, so keep coming back. Come back when you are weak, come back when you are strong. Just keep coming back and push that bottle away.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome to the forum - Lots of us have made some pretty insane decisions during our drinking days. Glad you're ready to put that behind you. Take it one day at a time and get all the support you can. Glad you joined us!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,410
LayLadyLay Welcome
I can understand where you coming from. It's hard sometimes because you lie to yourself that you can control the alcohol. I have 2 DUI and only have 3 months soberness. There is a lot of programs out for recover. Remember to take the first step to not drink and remember you can do it. I'm starting over again and using AA as a remember that I should not drink. It's tough but once your ready then things will looks up.
Glad you found SR!
I can understand where you coming from. It's hard sometimes because you lie to yourself that you can control the alcohol. I have 2 DUI and only have 3 months soberness. There is a lot of programs out for recover. Remember to take the first step to not drink and remember you can do it. I'm starting over again and using AA as a remember that I should not drink. It's tough but once your ready then things will looks up.
Glad you found SR!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Kent, UK
Posts: 351
LayLadyLay,
A superb post that wholly resonates with me though i am a male 29 year old. So much of what you say reflects my experience. The Drunk me and the Sober me are two wholly different people. I hate the drunk me. Hate him. The drunk me is a disgrace. Absolute disgrace.
Well, what I do know is you have to keep coming back. Never stop coming back.
Chimp!
A superb post that wholly resonates with me though i am a male 29 year old. So much of what you say reflects my experience. The Drunk me and the Sober me are two wholly different people. I hate the drunk me. Hate him. The drunk me is a disgrace. Absolute disgrace.
Well, what I do know is you have to keep coming back. Never stop coming back.
Chimp!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Spain
Posts: 298
When we are drunk, we do many stupid things. The good news is that we don't have to be drunk. Sobriety IS possible, but I found that I had to change my thinking, my habits, my attitudes... One day at a time I am experiencing an astonishing progress.
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 94
I can relate. I'm also 29 and married to a wonderful man and we have a beautiful little boy. I'm blessed in so many ways.
But I drink waaayyy too much. I hate who I am when I'm drunk. I can't imagine how annoying, dumb, mean and unattractive I am when I'm like that. Recently, a guy from my past contacted me. He's a total jerk who has no respect for my marriage. He tried many times to get me to go meet him. Thank God I never did, but I know that if he caught me at the right moment, with the right amount of booze in my head, I can't guarentee what would have happened. That scares me.
I just want alcohol out of my life! I'm right there with you. We can do it. I jusst need a plan.
But I drink waaayyy too much. I hate who I am when I'm drunk. I can't imagine how annoying, dumb, mean and unattractive I am when I'm like that. Recently, a guy from my past contacted me. He's a total jerk who has no respect for my marriage. He tried many times to get me to go meet him. Thank God I never did, but I know that if he caught me at the right moment, with the right amount of booze in my head, I can't guarentee what would have happened. That scares me.
I just want alcohol out of my life! I'm right there with you. We can do it. I jusst need a plan.
Its_me_jen
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
Welcome LLL!! I can relate a lot to your story. I did some similar things in my drinking days.
I've been sober now for a little while and I can tell you that things can get better.
I went, and still go, to lots of meetings, got a sponsor, and worked the steps.
It wasn't all peaches and cream but I've never been happier in my life. The hard work does pay off!
Keep coming back!
I've been sober now for a little while and I can tell you that things can get better.
I went, and still go, to lots of meetings, got a sponsor, and worked the steps.
It wasn't all peaches and cream but I've never been happier in my life. The hard work does pay off!
Keep coming back!
Came to Believe
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Montgomery AL
Posts: 507
Drunk Me is someone that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemies, but he's often someone I've inflicted on my best friends. Welcome to SR, LLL. I'm pretty new here myself, but it's already become a place that I regularly go to to give Sober Me a little boost when he needs one.
--Fenris.
--Fenris.
"I'll Be Free...or Die!"
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Virginia
Posts: 16
My heart goes out to you. You are doing the right thing for you right now by seeking support. Try not to beat up on yourself too much... it just makes us drink more. Love on yourself... Just love on yourself and listen to people who have been where we have not. God Bless...Love & Light to YOU & Yours
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