stellaloella

I am writing right now because I feel so utterly alone you guys are my life raft at such a bad time. I am horrified by the sheer amount of work I have ahead. To compound difficulties now it's snowed and that's going to hamper my move. I have such a long list of things ahead that I can't decide what needs to be done first. I am scared to death. I have been in the basement for what feels like a lifetime and I hate the smell down there. There's a really bad odor that has always been there (old house) but it is all I can do to draw air while I'm there. This house has always had really weird energy and I feel like I'm suffocating in it right now. I feel like being away from my daughter is hell on earth. There is so much to do and I feel completely stuck. I don't know how this move can even conceivably take place... 5 years of storing boxes, etc., no order to anything. Now the weather has come into the picture. I failed emissions, I haven't showered since Friday and actually have been in the same clothes (gross, I know). This is just the worst feeling in the world. My husband wants me to clean off all the crayon marks off the walls, etc. I have no clue what I'm doing. I just needed to vent. Thanks for lending your ear.

Dee74

Hi Stella

I had to move early in my recovery too with noone to help me either - it was a tough job but I found it easiest to do by focusing on it one day, one task at a time - like everything else.

You can do it - but be brutal - dump anything you don't need...try your best to stay focused on the job - there's nothing like keeping busy to help you through tough times.

But, remember to take care of yourself as well - have a shower, change your clothes, eat properly, try an get enough sleep - go for a walk or something every day...balance is important too

good luck Stella
D

Impurrfect

(((Stella))) - I agree with ((Dee)). You do have a lot to do, but I bet a nice hot bath would feel good?

I got hooked on the FlyLady site - she recommends doing something for just 15 minutes. Tell yourself "I'll do .... for 15 minutes" then take a break, eat something, listen to music you like, get something to eat, then tackle another 15 minutes. It sounds really simple, but it does work.

I can get really overwhelmed, and telling myself "I can do this for 15 minutes" gives me the opportunity to take a break, or tackle something else...for 15 minutes. It reminds me of when I was getting clean...I'd have to tell myself, when I was craving "okay, a craving lasts about 7 minutes, I can get through that". Maybe that's why it works for me.

I would suggest getting outside for some fresh air, but I have a friend in Seattle and they're getting really nasty weather, too, so don't think THAT is such a good idea!

I know you want to feel better, get this stuff done NOW, (most of us were/are that way), but it usually doesn't work that way. The one sure thing is that if you do what you can, take care of yourself, and don't drink, it WILL get better. It just takes time, sweetie.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

stellaloella

Thanks for your suggestions. I'm so overwhelmed that I'm having a really hard time prioritizing. The waves of anxiety crashing over me never seem to stop and the snow is really bumming me out because it's creates a logistical nightmare for me. I feel like I'm on the edge of insanity.

artsoul

Take some deep breaths and think of a few positive things in your life. I find this to be helpful when I don't think I can go on. I tell myself: today, I have a roof over my head and enough to eat. I'm not lying in a hospital bed in pain. I am sober.....

I think Impurrfect's idea about doing something for 15 minutes sounds great. Even 5 minutes. It's hard to get out of that paralysis, but just getting started on something can provide some momentum.

Easy Does It!