Polydrug Abuser
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 4
Polydrug Abuser
Hey everyone. Just wanted to say hi to everyone in this great community. Been reading for a while and finally registered, hopefully I'll keep coming back.
Anyways a little background.... For about 8 years I have abused almost all of the more common drugs, pot, benzos, cocaine, amphetamines (of all types) and lastly alcohol. Ironically I always stayed away from opiates because I have seen some friends go down hill very fast on them. So hey at least I did one thing right? lol.
For the past few weeks I have been gradually reducing my use of all drugs, but I'm finding it's much easier said then done. But I know I have to. As they say "i'm sick and tired of being sick and tired." I'm really hoping I can defeat these demons inside of me. I havent lost everything yet, but I know it's coming, if I don't change.
Sorry aboout the long introduction. But I wanted to make sure to thank all members of this forums. I have read a lot of post that have given me hope here. Drug forums have destroyed helped my decline, hopefully this forum will help me.
Anyways a little background.... For about 8 years I have abused almost all of the more common drugs, pot, benzos, cocaine, amphetamines (of all types) and lastly alcohol. Ironically I always stayed away from opiates because I have seen some friends go down hill very fast on them. So hey at least I did one thing right? lol.
For the past few weeks I have been gradually reducing my use of all drugs, but I'm finding it's much easier said then done. But I know I have to. As they say "i'm sick and tired of being sick and tired." I'm really hoping I can defeat these demons inside of me. I havent lost everything yet, but I know it's coming, if I don't change.
Sorry aboout the long introduction. But I wanted to make sure to thank all members of this forums. I have read a lot of post that have given me hope here. Drug forums have destroyed helped my decline, hopefully this forum will help me.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Glad you're here, TheDub. I'm glad you decided to join SR. We all need support while we're trying to get clean and sober and you've found a great place. Like you, I knew that if I didn't quit drinking soon, I would have to face a host of consequences. I could feel that my health was starting to decline and I really wasn't happy inside.
If you find that you're facing withdrawals (which most of us have), it would be wise to check with a physician. Keep posting!
If you find that you're facing withdrawals (which most of us have), it would be wise to check with a physician. Keep posting!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
((TheDub))) - welcome to SR!! Though crack is what eventually brought me to my knees, I abused quite a few other drugs, myself.
SR has been a HUGE part in me having almost 3-1/2 years clean, and I'm glad you've found us!!
I would recommend you see a dr., as alcohol and benzos can have some pretty bad and dangerous withdrawals.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
SR has been a HUGE part in me having almost 3-1/2 years clean, and I'm glad you've found us!!
I would recommend you see a dr., as alcohol and benzos can have some pretty bad and dangerous withdrawals.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 4
Thanks for the warm welcome everyone, I truly appreciate it.
As to the question about consulting a physician, I am currently seeing a psychiatrist, who is very liberal with giving me questionable amounts of drugs. For the life of me I do not know how I have prescriptions for adderall, xanax, Clonazepam, seroquel and occasionally ambien. Even with my limited medical knowledge, I know this combination screams addict, I feel like I'm basically prescribed a pharmaceutical speedball.
But addicts are tricky people of course. I'm dying on the inside to tell the Dr, that I am taking advantage of this situation and abusing my meds. However I know once I come clean about my abuse of my medications I will be cut off most likely permanently. Its like a paradox, I want to get better soooo bad, however I know this is a step that cannot be reversed.
And yes, the benzo's and alcohol withdrawals have been very trying on my body and mind (even though I still get the meds, I have honestly been gradually reducing, in safe increments.)
Everyday is a little struggle for me. I have been doing a decent job at trying to stay away from pot and cocaine. I even have been really doing much better with my drinking. However the benzos are something that I really am struggling with. That is why I have been tapering off the benzos much slower than any of my other drugs of choice.
I have cut off my connections to my drug using friends (my only friends.) But I know thats just how its going to have be. I'm doing this for me.
To get better I'm going to have to suffer a little and I accept this. I just hope that I can find it in me to live to learn a new way of life. I guess things like this just take time though. I just have to remember the despair that drugs brought me.
Again, thanks for the welcomes everyone
As to the question about consulting a physician, I am currently seeing a psychiatrist, who is very liberal with giving me questionable amounts of drugs. For the life of me I do not know how I have prescriptions for adderall, xanax, Clonazepam, seroquel and occasionally ambien. Even with my limited medical knowledge, I know this combination screams addict, I feel like I'm basically prescribed a pharmaceutical speedball.
But addicts are tricky people of course. I'm dying on the inside to tell the Dr, that I am taking advantage of this situation and abusing my meds. However I know once I come clean about my abuse of my medications I will be cut off most likely permanently. Its like a paradox, I want to get better soooo bad, however I know this is a step that cannot be reversed.
And yes, the benzo's and alcohol withdrawals have been very trying on my body and mind (even though I still get the meds, I have honestly been gradually reducing, in safe increments.)
Everyday is a little struggle for me. I have been doing a decent job at trying to stay away from pot and cocaine. I even have been really doing much better with my drinking. However the benzos are something that I really am struggling with. That is why I have been tapering off the benzos much slower than any of my other drugs of choice.
I have cut off my connections to my drug using friends (my only friends.) But I know thats just how its going to have be. I'm doing this for me.
To get better I'm going to have to suffer a little and I accept this. I just hope that I can find it in me to live to learn a new way of life. I guess things like this just take time though. I just have to remember the despair that drugs brought me.
Again, thanks for the welcomes everyone
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 438
Have you considered looking into AA or NA? I've found that having the support of a program and a network of new friends has been invaluable in dealing with my alcoholism. This could be particularly nice for you if, as you say, your drug using friends are your only friends. And of course keep posting here...it's a great community. Best of luck to you.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Dub,
Have you considered finding a doctor who is an addiction specialist? He or she should be able to get your meds straightened out, and, if further treatment is warranted, refer you to someone who won't keep throwning meds at you.
Have you considered finding a doctor who is an addiction specialist? He or she should be able to get your meds straightened out, and, if further treatment is warranted, refer you to someone who won't keep throwning meds at you.
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