Lithobid

I'm good throughout the week, but these weekends hit, and I just about go crazy for a drink. I make 2 meetings (sometimes 3) per day on the weekends, but it's sunny, hot, and saturday, and I am dying for a cold beer, whisky, anything that will take me to oblivion. It really goes to show how this sickness plays out, the fact that I don't even want a drink, I want oblivion. I want to be whisked out of me into a fourth dimension of buzzdness where nothing much matters. It's a shame, I hate this disease right now, hate it, wish I didn't have it. Listen to me with the poor-me's. Not going to drink, but I'd sure like to right now.

-Lith

artsoul

At least you recognize you want oblivion and are not fooling yourself that you can just have a couple drinks. Oblivion comes with a big price, as you know. Each time we reach that point, our bodies and minds are damaged and fight back with a vengence the next day. We don't even know whether the next binge will land us in the hospital or dead of alcohol poisoning.

Some days all I can do is get involved in a TV show or read old posts here at SR. Do you feel this way very often? If so, why not talk to a psychiatrist just to see if you might have some underlying depression? I know when I'm depressed, nothing sounds good. I just want to curl up in a ball somewhere and have the world disappear.

Hope this passes soon, Lithobid. You're doing well to hang in there!!

least

Hang on tight to your sobriety. With the passage of more time the obsession to drink will go away. At least it has for me after almost seven months. And remember, there's nothing so bad that alcohol can't make it worse. I won't drink cause I don't want to find out how much lower I can sink...

sobermax

Hey Lithobid,

Hang in there. I know EXACTLY what you mean. Don't listen to it. Do something, anything to take your mind off it. Keep posting.

eleanor

I came here to post that I was having a hell of a time this evening. I'm alone - friends are at a cottage getting hammered and I'm left here to my own devices. I'm bored and itching to go grab a bottle of wine and just drink it.

My brain keeps saying "what's the harm? It's just one night." I know better...

Anyway - you're not alone in this. You've made it 27 days - almost a month! That's just awesome.

Shygirl

My brain keeps saying "what's the harm? It's just one night." I know better...

That is exactly what happens to me.....I make myself believe that I can drink just one......And there I go on a five day binge......

price

hang in there Lith....on the weekends, sometimes i just try to go to bed early....remember how much better it is to wake up clean and sober with a full day ahead!!! Good luck!

Dee74

I wanted oblivion too Lithobid.

It was only when I had no choice but get sober I came to realise reality wasn't that bad - it was my fear of reality, a false perception of what reality was, that I was drinking against.

Of course I also did a lot of work fixing those parts of me, and my life, that needed fixing - for me it was a lot more than just not drinking. That takes time.

Hang in there lithobid

D

Grace2

That just sounds like me too! The weekends are the hardest, but be strong. It's that first drink that does the damage!

Anna

Recognizing the addict voice is the first step towards letting it go. You can hear it, but you know what it is, so let it go.

Lithobid

Thank you all for your supporting words, I appreciate them. I'm taking it easy, and one day at a time, I know the cravings will pass.

-Lith