Still going strong on Day 12
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2010
Location: St Petersburg, FL
Posts: 43
Still going strong on Day 12
Made it to Day 12!
I find myself amazed this morning at the body and mind's ability to repair themselves. Physically, I am really starting to feel almost normal. I am sleeping 7 to 8 hours a night and the night sweats have substantially decreased. I still have them but to a much lower degree. Every night is a little better.
Mentally, I am so much stronger than 12 days ago. I felt like I would never be capable of even one optimistic thought. I thought my life was over. I was convinced I would forever be filled with a sense of impending doom. Thank God that is not true. I still have anxiety, guilt, shame and fear. But they are not all consuming as they once were. I'm able to reflect, realize how horrible my actions were due to alcohol and then take it to the present and be grateful that I'm not drinking today and causing more situations to regret later.
I've never felt capable of sobriety and recovery before. I worried I was 'constitutionally incapable'. And then I did everything I could to prove that I was. But somewhere deep inside, I really wanted to quit. The problem was I wanted to drink more than I wanted to quit. Today, and for the last 10 or so days, my desire to quit is much stronger than my desire to drink. MUCH stronger. I am filled with joy at this realization. That joy helps me to deal with the despair I can feel when I recall the depths that I have gone to in my life due to alcohol. That joy gives me the strength to not drink today. That joy gives me hope.
I'm only 12 days in. I don't want to sound like I'm living in some fantasy where I believe that life will be perfect from now on and that I'll never want to drink again. Past experience tells me that I will most likely experience cravings again.
Somehow, posting here and reading all of your posts helps to keep me stronger. I plan to be here on SR daily for a very long time. Reading other peoples stories, advice and congratulations shows me I'm not alone. There are millions of us out there in the world. It's incredible when we support each other. Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts on a daily basis and for being here every day.
Have a beautiful sober day everyone,
Steven
I find myself amazed this morning at the body and mind's ability to repair themselves. Physically, I am really starting to feel almost normal. I am sleeping 7 to 8 hours a night and the night sweats have substantially decreased. I still have them but to a much lower degree. Every night is a little better.
Mentally, I am so much stronger than 12 days ago. I felt like I would never be capable of even one optimistic thought. I thought my life was over. I was convinced I would forever be filled with a sense of impending doom. Thank God that is not true. I still have anxiety, guilt, shame and fear. But they are not all consuming as they once were. I'm able to reflect, realize how horrible my actions were due to alcohol and then take it to the present and be grateful that I'm not drinking today and causing more situations to regret later.
I've never felt capable of sobriety and recovery before. I worried I was 'constitutionally incapable'. And then I did everything I could to prove that I was. But somewhere deep inside, I really wanted to quit. The problem was I wanted to drink more than I wanted to quit. Today, and for the last 10 or so days, my desire to quit is much stronger than my desire to drink. MUCH stronger. I am filled with joy at this realization. That joy helps me to deal with the despair I can feel when I recall the depths that I have gone to in my life due to alcohol. That joy gives me the strength to not drink today. That joy gives me hope.
I'm only 12 days in. I don't want to sound like I'm living in some fantasy where I believe that life will be perfect from now on and that I'll never want to drink again. Past experience tells me that I will most likely experience cravings again.
Somehow, posting here and reading all of your posts helps to keep me stronger. I plan to be here on SR daily for a very long time. Reading other peoples stories, advice and congratulations shows me I'm not alone. There are millions of us out there in the world. It's incredible when we support each other. Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts on a daily basis and for being here every day.
Have a beautiful sober day everyone,
Steven
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2010
Location: St Petersburg, FL
Posts: 43
Least - Thank you for your kind words and your inspiration! Congratulations on six months. That is huge!
TwelveSteps - Congratulations!!! I think the first three days are the hardest! What a rollercoaster. My hat is off to you for hanging in there. You already know it gets better. Knowing that helps me to go on. Thanks so much for ur post!
TwelveSteps - Congratulations!!! I think the first three days are the hardest! What a rollercoaster. My hat is off to you for hanging in there. You already know it gets better. Knowing that helps me to go on. Thanks so much for ur post!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Sunny Down Under
Posts: 64
Steven, I've really taken an interest in your story because it some of the things you write sound exactly like me (both Canadian expats as well 
).
Writing about your withdrawl symptoms sound alot like what I went through. After about ten days, my anxiety (which was overwhelming and terrifying) began to ease, as well as my procastination and night sweats (how many sleeping shirts have I skunked out?). I began to believe in a better future, one that didn't include alcohol, something I hadn't previously thought possible.
Like you I also thought I was constitutionally incapable of not drinking, and it's certaintly what most others thought. Somebody without will power. I'm on day 58 today and while I realize it's not all that much time in the grand scheme of things, it is also incredibly empowering at the same time.
Keep up the updates and hang on to your hat. Sobriety is a wild ride.
). Writing about your withdrawl symptoms sound alot like what I went through. After about ten days, my anxiety (which was overwhelming and terrifying) began to ease, as well as my procastination and night sweats (how many sleeping shirts have I skunked out?). I began to believe in a better future, one that didn't include alcohol, something I hadn't previously thought possible.
Like you I also thought I was constitutionally incapable of not drinking, and it's certaintly what most others thought. Somebody without will power. I'm on day 58 today and while I realize it's not all that much time in the grand scheme of things, it is also incredibly empowering at the same time.
Keep up the updates and hang on to your hat. Sobriety is a wild ride.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2010
Location: St Petersburg, FL
Posts: 43
Thanks again everyone.
Hey Marlow, I appreciate your post. 58 Days is incredible! Congratulations. I look forward to hearing more about you. Nice to hear from a fellow Canadian :-) Keep on keeping on!
Hey Marlow, I appreciate your post. 58 Days is incredible! Congratulations. I look forward to hearing more about you. Nice to hear from a fellow Canadian :-) Keep on keeping on!
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Originally Posted by StevenD 
Somehow, posting here and reading all of your posts helps to keep me stronger.
That's your program of action - keep it up!!
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