firestorm090

I just had an experience that, when I was alone and allowed to process the events of the last couple days, renewed my faith in people and helped me see just how futile anger is sometimes.

After being rushed to the er a couple days ago, due to my bad ticker and the frustration I allowed to build over a couple people in my life, I was surrounded by people who didn't know me, didn't know "My problems", (which of course are the most important, cause I'm so special, lol, just kidding) and they showed me love on a real basis, a basis which I have seen before, yet I so quickly forget. That's why I'm posting about it, so that I don't forget so easily just how much others do care, how they will help a total stranger and try to make them feel better, and then go about their day. I want to be like that, not like the miserable guy I've been here lately. I'm gonna try to just let all the negativity go, just move on from it and start fresh, with a new outlook and new spirit. It will take some work, but so does being a jerk, so I want to work towards the higher goal of learning how to be a healthy part of this world, and I welcome all here who help light the path to share their own pointers along the way. I have much to learn.

Huh, maybe it's not too late to become "part of", and stay "part of"? I've had enough of being alone. How bout you?

NewBeginning010

Great to hear from you FS, I was going to post in the MIA thread about you but left it alone. I was thinking about you & hoping all is well.

Isnt it great when you meet genuine people that really care & dont expect anything back. Its sad how rare that seems to be sometimes.

Glad you are doing ok, hope the ticker is doing well too (sounds scary)

Take Care

NB

OZboy

it's always a pleasure[i mean that] when you post your feelings,because
helping you....helps me..take care my friend...Oz.

firestorm090

Thanks NB,

I'm amazed at how much you've grown since we both started back in Feb. I've slipped up too many times to even care to count, but you've held fast, and I'm proud of you. Thanks for your concern and I plan to stick around here a long time..............gotta be careful with saying that, some may just be tired enough to start tossing boulders my way, lol.

Thanks for being my friend!! :ghug3

firestorm090

Oz, my man, you're always in my corner, so now I'm in yours, have been all along, but kept wandering off to hit the ole jug. No more wandering off, I'm gonna start hitting my knees instead of the jug. Thanks my friend.

CarolD

Wow ....the last I knew you were going to bed
with chest tightness but not in the ER
I'm really you did go...

Glad you are here with us again
I was getting concerned.

firestorm090

Carol, I apologize for my posts the other night, and now see things differently, it's funny how the Good Lord works, but HP seems to know what we need when we don't. The whole experience was a wakeup call in several ways, and I'm trying to heed the call this time. As the doc said, there may not be another, so I'd better pay attention. Thanks for your help the other night and for all the nights that you're here!!

NewBeginning010

FS, thank you so much for that but I have slipped too but haven't given up. I have been thinking about giving antabuse a try. Maybe we can both give it a go together

firestorm090

Hey NB, I'm going to speak with my doc on Monday to ensure it's ok. I'm on six meds right now, and they make me tired, so I want to make sure I have no reactions, especially considering my most recent episode. I'll let you know.

BTW, I don't have slips, I have full-blown screwups, lol. Next time I slip, stumble, or fall, I want to make sure it's on the path of sobriety, not off the path. I'm with ya all the way, come h*ll or highwater.

NewBeginning010

Sounds good, I need to set up an appointment with my doc to discuss antabuse... lovingmenow is loving it ;-)

This article was good Antabuse-Disulfiram Facts for Alcoholism and Addiction

I dont think it will be a cure all in any way, just some delay time between bad decisions.

Let me know how it goes with your doc.

tommyk

"so I want to work towards the higher goal of learning how to be a healthy part of this world..."

For me, that is the definition of spirituality.

firestorm090

Thanks tommyk,

It's actually quite liberating to finally realize that after 50 yrs, I don't know much at all, lol. It truly is, it's like waking up to the fact that I haven't even begun to learn what really matters, and that's ok today.