seekinrecovery

My friends are across the street right now - drinking I'm sure. Which is why I'm sure we didn't get the phone call to join the crowd. Feeling shunned - feeling bitter - only on day 3, but situations like this make it SO tough to hang in there. I went to dinner earlier with my family - and there they were - their two families together, drinking, socializing - having a grand ol' time. Don't want to be left out, don't want to drink, but don't want to this crappy feeling either.

Too much self-pity, huh?

CarolD

Perhaps calling one of your AA phone numbers will help.

Be gentle with yourself...your still in de tox mode.


Have you heard of H.A.L.T.?
Everytime I returned to drinking...at
2 of these elements were in place.
Sooo...
Don't allow yourself to become overly
Hungry...Angry..Lonely ..Tired.

Keep moving forward.

KenL

Only on day three?! That is awsome! Think about that more than anything. You're doing great. I can understand the feelings you have but you're changing your lifestyle for the better. Don't worry about what they might be thinking either. Just stick to your goal of being sober and in time everything will get better.

seekinrecovery

Thanks - I've been needing to hear back. And I needed to read you're thoughts. Thanks for the encouragement. I know they don't understand b/c they aren't alcies, but I'd like so badly for them to get how difficult it is.

coffeenut

I don't think they're going to 'get' how difficult it is. My husband certainly didn't as he was knocking back beer every night.

Day three is good. Be gentle with yourself. Celebrate YOU.

Welcome to SR. Keep reading and posting.

flutter

You are in a much better place right now than they are... and you most certainly will be when you wake up tomorrow!

Fubarcdn

Perhaps your friends are not shunning you but maybe they just don't know what to say yet or perhaps they don't want to tempt you because they are supporting you in their own way.
Don't assume the worst.

least

Staying sober takes some major changes in our lifestyles. I agree with not assuming the worst. Keep an open mind and focus on your sobriety and treating yourself kindly. You can do this!:ghug3

Isaiah

I have a very close friend who I lost touch with when we both moved off to new cities. Several months ago he happened to move to my town.

So far I have not seen him once. He is of the drinking lifestyle, and he was a drinking buddy for me. I want to hang out with him badly, but I don't want to put myself into a situation where I could find myself with pressure to drink (of all my friends he is probably the only one who would pressure me to, that's how he is.)

I like this guy, he's a genuine character. So I plan to stay friends with him. My idea is that I just need to be more comfortable than I am now with sobriety. Because I know that if by some stupid mistake I got back to boozing, I'm going to be not only a miserable person but a crappy friend. So for me part of avoiding some social situations is with the expectation that in time I can be social without reservations when alcohol may be present. And not sacrificing everything by getting too far ahead of what I can handle.

Yeah, it stinks, but it's like someone said to me about "accept the things you cannot change."

parentrecovers

hugs to you, seeking. i can understand how hard it is for you. just let it go. you can't change what other people do. don't take it personally.

keep posting! k

Anna

I understand how much you want your friends to understand what you're going through.

What I have learned in recovery, is that we all on our own journey. They don't understand how difficult early sobriety is. But, you're doing great!