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In need of help to stop drinking...

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Old 12-20-2008, 06:24 PM
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In need of help to stop drinking...

I don't know where to begin so this post may seem a bit fragmented. Basically, I know I have a problem drinking and I am seeking advice to stop. Posting this is the first time I've really reached out for help, even though I've now been knowing I need to quit for 3 years - longer, actually.

I have dealt with legal and financial problems due to drinking. I do not drink every day, but what happens is I will remain sober for a week or two, then start out one night going to the bar and drinking a bit. Then I binge for the next several days - this behavior has been going on for years and I just turned 30 and the madness must now stop. At times it's led to drug use as well, though not so much lately as, say, a year ago. I drink because I am bored, basically - at least that's what it appears like on the surface, though I know there are deeper psychological reasons. I drink because I enjoy going out, but then I drink the next day to get rid of the hangover/withdrawl symptoms.

I am posting here because I feel I need to address this issue, but feel more comfortable doing so on a message board than face to face at actual meetings. I was ordered to go to AA meetings about 2 and a half years ago by a judge, but I did not feel comfortable and don't feel I got a lot out of them.

My drinking is exacerbated by what is likely bipolarism and a tendency to be kind of an extreme person - I really feel like trying to be a productive member of a an online community like this will help me straighten some of these things out and stop drinking. Perhaps I can also help others in the process.
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Old 12-20-2008, 06:29 PM
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Welcome! I'm new on this journey too, but you've found a great place to be.
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Old 12-20-2008, 06:32 PM
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Hi there;
I understand everything you are saying...been there, done that, and then been there again. Don't feel bad that no-one replied, I think it is just the time of year. Please stick around, you're in the right place. I don't have a lot of support or advice to give you because I am ONCE AGAIN trying to get myself back on track. But I see that you've reached out and didn't want you to feel alone. So please, stick around, others will help you out soon.
T.
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Old 12-20-2008, 06:47 PM
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Hi and Welcome,

Avocado, you are right that being a participating member of an online community can help your recovery. This place never fails to inspire me and I've been here for a long time.

In my opinion, drinking is a symptom, and when the drinking stops, the underlying problems have to be addressed. In my case, I was a control-freak, alternately angry and depressed and had no self-worth. I had a lot of work to do and am still working on myself.

I hope that you keep reading and posting.
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Old 12-20-2008, 06:47 PM
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Overall my life problems I have encountered in the last 7 years were 98% because of my drinking, 100% of my legal issues. Kind of amazing that I already handed almost 1/3 of my time here on earth to this terrible disease!

I knew I needed to quit for about 20 months....and those 20 months were hell. With my best being 3 months sober, and 1 month another time. Sure I had some good moments here and there, but you know what I mean.

Everyone reaches a point where if they really want to QUIT and recover they will. Where is your bottom? Good luck! We're pulling for ya!

On a positive note, I have discovered my love for seedless oranges in sobriety!
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Old 12-20-2008, 07:10 PM
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I don't know if I want to quit and recover. I do know I need to. Right now it feels like I want to but it always does after a binge. I drank Monday through this morning but avoided any more after this morning and will try not to drink tomorrow. I can't say what will happen after several days without a drink and I'm no longer feeling all hungover. Sometimes I wish I could just check into a rehab for a month and be forced not to drink.
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Old 12-20-2008, 07:12 PM
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Avocado-

I am also new here, 12 days sober today. I also reached out to this website first then started going to meetings. Just keep going...you will find one that you like, I promise. I get something out of everyone I go to. I identify with your story...I have been thinking that I had a drinking problem for the past 4 years and I am 40. I wish I could go back and make that decision at 30. Know what you are doing is right. It's insane to try and control our drinking, it won't happen. Take care and keep coming back!
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Old 12-20-2008, 07:19 PM
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welcome avocado.

this is a good place to be

D
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Old 12-20-2008, 07:32 PM
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Welcome, avocado!

This site has so many resources and perspectives to offer that I'm sure it will increase your ability to better yourself, if you let it. We're all works-in-progress, and we'll get there.
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Old 12-20-2008, 07:36 PM
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Welcome to SR, avocado!

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Old 12-20-2008, 11:41 PM
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Welcome Avocado,

I relate with everything you said. This is forum a wonderful and amazing place. I hope you Keep coming back!

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Old 12-20-2008, 11:49 PM
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Welcome. SR has been a big part of my sobriety. I can come here anytime I need to.
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Old 12-20-2008, 11:53 PM
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I just looked up at the clock as I was reading your thread here. It was 1:45. In Texas we give last call at 1:45, so I can officially say that I just made it 24 hours sober.

That's the only way this works is being totally aware of what you are thinking and doing. Especially if you decide you want to leave the "buzzed" life behind.

The hardest part is always filling your life up with new things to do with yourself and the new found time. Sometimes it involves very radical lifestyle changes and getting rid of (or away from) people and places that we know are wrong for us - especially in the beginning.

I'm there with you again and I can tell already this forum is going to be a major part of my recovery.

Keep checking in, and writing down your thoughts - I know that's my plan for me.
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Old 12-21-2008, 12:13 AM
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Welcome ....

Hope this info helps you decide to quit.


Progression of Alcoholism

Here's how alcoholism typically progresses:

SOCIAL DRINKERS — Most Americans are characterized as social drinkers. Statistics indicate, however, that one of every 16 drinkers will become alcoholic.

WARNING SIGNS — The individual begins to drink more frequently and more than his associates. He drinks for confidence or to tolerate or escape problems. No party or other occasion is complete without a couple of drinks. Driving and drinking become routine.

EARLY ALCOHOLISM — With increasing frequency, the individual drinks too much. "Blackouts," or temporary amnesia, occur during or following drinking episodes. He drinks more rapidly than others, sneaks drinks and in other ways conceals the quantity that he drinks. He resents any reference to his drinking habits.

BASIC ALCOHOLISM — The individual begins to lose control as to the time, place and amount of his drinking. He gets drunk unintentionally. He hides and protects his liquor supply. He drinks to overcome the hangover from his prior drinking. He tries new patterns of drinking as to time and place of drinking. He attempts cures by moving to new locations or by changing his drinking companions.

CHRONIC ALCOHOLISM — The individual becomes a loner in his drinking. He develops alibis, excuses and rationalizations to cover up or explain his drinking. Personality and behavior changes occur that affect all relationships — family, employment, community. Extended binges, physical tremors, hallucinations and delirium, complete rejection of social reality, malnutrition with accompanying illness and disease and early death all occur as chronic alcoholism progresses.


Source: American Medical Association
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Old 12-21-2008, 03:46 AM
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Don't ever be afraid to give yourself a pep-talk. These have been instrumental in dealing with the world sans my personal favorite numbing-agent.

Seriously. There's nothing wrong with them. I don't know about some of you, but if I wanted to get down on myself, I'd know every button to push, and how. So, I'm best off not. But I'm learning my strengths, and healthy habits!

It's a progress, much like alcoholism, that progresses, but this one is much more productive and will be better in time.
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Old 12-21-2008, 05:50 AM
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Welcome to a great place for support. With the help of the members here I've stayed sober for 23 weeks now. It's been a lot of hard work, still is, but is so rewarding to not wake up hungover and full of shame and self loathing.

You can do it too. Just don't drink for today. Just today. Try it.
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Old 12-21-2008, 05:53 AM
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Welcome!
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Old 12-21-2008, 07:24 AM
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Thriving sober since 12/18/08
 
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Welcome Been exactly where you are too.. well I still am, other than the shift from knowing I need to be sober, to WANTING it so bad nothing else seems more important. It took me a handful of "rock bottoms", boy if I could have avoided those.... But here we are, I wish you luck.

In regards to rehab, I haven't gone. I have been sober for months at a time, I know it's not that 30 days that I need, inpatient, it's a for-the-rest-of-my-life thing. I really hope you find what works, most importantly the desire for a sober life. Please stick around, this place is full of rockstars ready to battle along side of you against this terrible disease.
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Old 12-21-2008, 11:45 AM
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Hi - Welcome.

I find SR to be an amazing resource. It really helps enhance what I get from AA meetings, readings, etc... I can log on anytime and get through the rough spots.

Maybe you could rethink the AA thing. Maybe if you go because you want what they have and not because you were ordered to, you'll be more open to their message.

Keep coming back!
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