Don't know what to do
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 4
Don't know what to do
Dear all,
I live with an alcoholic for more than 5 years now. He admitted to have a problem only 2 years ago. Since he is trying to stay sober,but not more than a month at a time. He was in the hospital already two times, the last time only a month ago when he was found on the street unconcious, the doctors said if they had founf him half an hour later he would have been death. After that it was ok for 2 weeks, then I noticed that he started drinking agiain. He is saying that he goes to AA meetings, but never reaches the destination.
Today he was going to a meeting, but before he was supposed to go to an AA friend for dinner, 2 hours later they were both drunk. I picked him up and left him at his parents' place to sleep.
I really don't know what to do. I just can't let go. I love him so much. He is a wonderful person when he doesn't drink. And an animal when he does.
He tells me that it is my fault that he drinks, that I have changed, that I am working or that I am studying.
Is it my fault and what can I do to make him stop?
THank you
I live with an alcoholic for more than 5 years now. He admitted to have a problem only 2 years ago. Since he is trying to stay sober,but not more than a month at a time. He was in the hospital already two times, the last time only a month ago when he was found on the street unconcious, the doctors said if they had founf him half an hour later he would have been death. After that it was ok for 2 weeks, then I noticed that he started drinking agiain. He is saying that he goes to AA meetings, but never reaches the destination.
Today he was going to a meeting, but before he was supposed to go to an AA friend for dinner, 2 hours later they were both drunk. I picked him up and left him at his parents' place to sleep.
I really don't know what to do. I just can't let go. I love him so much. He is a wonderful person when he doesn't drink. And an animal when he does.
He tells me that it is my fault that he drinks, that I have changed, that I am working or that I am studying.
Is it my fault and what can I do to make him stop?
THank you
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,584
Hi,
There is little you can do to make him stop drinking. That's a decision he must make on his own.
You can get support for yourself and take care of yourself. Have you considered AlAnon?
There is little you can do to make him stop drinking. That's a decision he must make on his own.
You can get support for yourself and take care of yourself. Have you considered AlAnon?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 4
Hi,
THank you for your reply. I have considered Alanon, but the problem is that I live in the Netheralands and I am not Dutch, going to meetings where I can understand only half of what people say and not being able to say anything in Dutch didin't help me a lot. I just couldn't stop crying
so I stopped going to the meetings. I thought I can get some ideas here.
THank you for your reply. I have considered Alanon, but the problem is that I live in the Netheralands and I am not Dutch, going to meetings where I can understand only half of what people say and not being able to say anything in Dutch didin't help me a lot. I just couldn't stop crying
so I stopped going to the meetings. I thought I can get some ideas here.
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