Eclipse

First of all, my doctor was not there. They said they called me, but I checked my phone and there were no messages and no missed calls and I only drank 3 glasses of wine last night so I know I didn't "forget". They asked me if I wanted to see another doctor and I said yes, because its not like I have a relationship with the MIA doctor, plus, I knew I might not reschedule cuz I was really nervous.

The doctor came in and asked me what was going on. I told him my blood pressure has been really high, I can't sleep at night, I have high anxiety, etc. (and this is the tough part) I told him I think it is because I am drinking too much. I could see right away he was very uncomfortable. He asked me a few questions, like how much I drink, how long I have been doing it, do I feel suicidal? I answered his questions and he said I needed to get on some medication. So he prescribed Ativan for anxiety, but it is highly addictive, so only 30 days worth. And also Lexapro...an antidepressant, is this supposed to make me not want to drink? And lets give someone with an addictive personality an addictive drug after she just told you she' s worried about drinking too much. Oh yea, he also said, Don't drink alcohol with the Ativan....WHAT? When I said I am worried that I can't stop, and do I just slow down or just stop....he said just stop, you can do it!

I tried to talk about my drinking (very uncomfortable for me) and I was worried about damage to my internal organs, i.e.liver, etc. And all he said was it took years to develop liver problems and since I had my gallbladder out 1-1/2 years ago, (and must have had all kinds of blood tests) my liver was fine then.

I just feel like I got no answers and feel stupid because I was crying so hard I couldn't talk and I knew he was uncomfortable. I don't want to feel the prescriptions because I might be asking for trouble.

He did give me a name for a therapist and said to make an appointment. I just feel like a failure.

RK2007

I don't know what to say, that's shocking.

You should go back and tell them you're not happy about your appointment and say you'd like to complain.

I thought doctors were supposed to listen to your concerns and explain things to you properly - especially if you're worried about stuff.

adore79

Sorry you had such a bad appointment eclipse, but I can relate. After I recovered from alcoholic hepatitis my doc said never to drink alcohol again. That was it, just never drink again! People as young as early twenties get liver problems and even die from drinking too much.

I am on ativan and have been for over a year. I have found that I can take it without abusing it, but that is just me. I never liked drugs, just booze. My advice is to keep going back to the doc, hopefully a different one. There are also chemical dependency counselors (the same as a therapist) that you can see. Good luck.

tommyk

"he said just stop, you can do it!"

Sorry... you're gonna hate me - but you've got to stop drinking. The doctor cannot do it for you. The doctor cannot give you anything to make you stop drinking.

The answer is simple, so simple that it is extremely complex: stop drinking (please).

Stop drinking. No more wine. Not even one glass or a sip. No more alcohol.

Do not drink.

(A doctor told me this in those kinds of words in 1994. He said he didn't have the time or resources to hold my hand and comfort me - he said go see a counselor or therapist for that, but stop drinking, see you, bye bye, he had patients with medical problems to treat. I was PISSED. But I stopped drinking. I sincerely hope you do too. I'm on your side, I'm here for you, but I owe it to you to tell you the truth.)

Horselover

I am so sorry! I know that was so awfully hard for you to go to, but can you try someone else, maybe someone who deals with addictions?? Are there specialists for addictions? I assume there would be. I definitely wouldn't be satisfied or happy with the outcome of that appointment. Hugs to you for trying so hard. Don't give up on this yet.

Eclipse

Thanks for the support, I really appreciate it.

And TommyK, You just gave me a major "duh" moment. I guess what was I expecting? A miracle? He would whip out his Harry Potter magic wand and I would never want to drink again?? You are right JUST STOP. I was sitting here trying to talk myself out of stopping at the store after work for a "poor me" bottle of wine! I think that just did it!! THANKS

least

Generally if a doctor is not proficient in a particular field they will refer you to a specialist. I wonder why this doctor didn't refer you to an addiction specialist.

:ghug3

TryingSoHard

Oh my gosh. I'm sorry it went that way! I can imagine how nervous you were to begin with, then to have him kind of blow you off like that... Did he not even draw any blood for ANY tests?!? I say complain and go see someone else. It will suck to have to go through it again, but it doesn't sound like much got accomplished today.

*HUGS*

(and TommyK has a really good point...)

Aysha

I agree with Tommy. But at the same time I know how it feels to go to a Dr and pour your heart out and leave feeling like you were invisible talkiing to yourself.

It took me a few visits to get my Dr to understand what I was saying. And what I wanted.
Yea..Just stop. But it is alot more to it than that.
To me thats the easy part is stopping. Now staying stopped is the hard part.
Find a program. There is no miracle cure for this.
It takes commitment and hard work.

But dont give up if you feel like you didnt get your point across with the Dr.
You need to be honest about what you expect or think should happen. Then they can tell you if it is advised or not.
Hang in there.

Ananda

I was fortunate as my dr had been treating me for years and although he said just stop he stuck with me when I couldn't and saved my life several times in the last year of drinking....but then again, he couldn't really do much to help me other than keep me alive and treat the physical problems tht I developed to the best of his ability and encourage me to seek other sources of help. He was always willing to refer me to specialiest on different issues as there are others better trained to deal with different ilnesses etc.

The darkest moments of my life where when I knew I couldn't get sober and when I knew I was an alchoholic but didn't care anymore.

People like those here at SR just stuck with me till I finally put down the drink and started on sobriety.

Please take care of your self and keep coming to SR.:ghug

Anna

Hi Eclipse,

I'm sorry it went badly for you, but maybe your hopes were too high. I mean maybe you were hoping for a miracle, when in fact, it is up to you.

I think if your dr told you it would be safe to stop, after you told him how much you drink, then I would accept that it's okay. If you don't feel comfortable using the Ativan, then just toss it. You can do this!

I think he should have given you a blood test, since you were concerned.

Lily

I think he should have done a liver function on you. Did he refer you to AA or anything? I think he should of.

I'm sorry, but a lot of Drs. just are versed on addiction and alcoholism. Perhaps you should look to an addictionologist, but then again like Tommy said, you gotta quit or perhaps you can go to rehab? blessings, Sheila

XanaKat

Hi Eclipse,

Wow - that sounds very rotten. My suggestion would be to find another dr. Also - I'm not sure how much you have been drinking, but depending on that - withdrawal could be an issue, so stopping cold turkey could be an issue - I would think that your dr. would have/could have given you some sound advice and direction on this. Also, if its been 1-1.5 years since blood tests were done - I would demand them (maybe after finding a new dr.) I have recently had some major health issues, and I am all for sticking up for yourself, as I find a lot of drs will not listen.

I have seen an addiction counselor for alcohol, and he has been a wealth of info and advice as well. That could be something really helpful for you Hang in there.

Lenina

I'm so sorry you had a bad experience. Many doctors are not well-trained on addictions. One once told me "it's a self-limiting thing." What did that mean? Keep looking until you find a doctor who understands and knows how to proceed.

Is there an Employee Assistance Program through your work? Many have anonymous hotlines you can call to get a referral.

Don't give up. Help is out there.

Love,

Lenina

Eclipse

Thanks again for the support. I guess like Anna said, maybe my hopes were too high and I thought he would say or do something and I would say, "Okay, I get it...wow I don't feel like drinking anymore...a miracle cure!"

I still do feel like he kind of dismissed me and was very uncomfortable and just gave me medication to "fix" it, and I know that isn't the answer. I know I have to do this myself. I think I will go to the therapist....they are the ones who are supposed to listen to me spew.lol

Thanks again.

My parent are coming to visit tomorrow for a few days, and that always adds to the stress, because my dad is an alcoholic. I see my dad get drunk and it is so embarrassing, (so why do I keep doing it?). My mom says, you need to talk to your dad about his drinking (she has no clue how much I drink).

Like I have said before I am the mom that works at school, on this committee and that and works part time and nobody would ever have a clue that I drink as much as I do. Only my husband knows.

So I will just keep pluggin' along and make that decision to not drink anymore. Lately I have only had a couple of glasses of wine a night, and then I start to think...see I can do this....but then something happens (any kind of stress) and there I go...two bottles...feel like crap tomorrow, etc...the cycle continues and will continue until I FIGURE IT OUT!!!!

Rowan

I'm sorry you had such a negative experience. It's extremely frustrating when we go to a professional, wanting real help, and getting a band-aid solution.
Ativan is a benzodiazepene. I was prescribed them for anxiety at 2 years sober and ended up eating them like candy, relapsing on booze, and ending up in rehab. Withdrawals are dangerous and painful! Toss them!
I understand where you are at because I have been there. You can quit drinking and go on to live a productive and happy life. Keep reaching out, keep sharing. You are not alone and we do care.

Bradster

If doctors are like they are here in the Uk you shouldn't feel too bad. Here they have a set amount of time to diagnose and treat as best they can, so your doctor was probably not thinking about how you feel at all. He's probably into nut and bolts if you know what I mean....this fixes this problem, next please.

I suppose it's up to us all to at least to think about how to get to a better place. You should probably get another appointment when you're a bit more composed and state your problems and how you might solve them, maybe write down some stuff?

Maybe a therapist will be a lot more sympathetic and not so clinical.

Eclipse

Thanks Rowan,

I have never done drugs...tried pot a couple of times and hated it. But when the doctor told me ativan was addictive I was kinda surprised that he would just give them to me like that...he has never met me before. I don't think I will fill the prescription.

The MIA doctor I normally go to is nice, but we have never really clicked. The doctor I had before her I loved so much (he retired and referred me to this new doctor) and others claimed he had no bedside manner, but he would give it to me straight and tell me to pull myself together and go for a walk, but was very supportive. (I have had anxiety/depression problems in the past after I had twins -- before I found {excessive} alcohol--to make it worse) But at least he said it and made me think.

ForeverDecember

I'm sorry that your appointment didn't go as well as you'd hoped.

I think the doctor was trying to "fix" the physical reasons you drink - stress, depression. I was on Lexepro and Lithium together for a while, it's not too bad - but it'll take a few weeks for the drugs to build up in your system and start working so if you do decide to fill the Lexepro script make sure you don't give up after a couple weeks because it's "not working". Also - since you can't drink on them, they might work as another tool to keep you away from the alcohol. If you're feeling anxious you get a choice - take the pill and get help that way, or drink a bottle of wine and fix nothing. In the Chronic thread Isaiah said something that summed it up well for me - "Alcohol is only a sensation of everything being okay. It's not real. Whatever is hard today will still be hard tomorrow, or worse."

For me, the obvious solution of "just don't drink" coming from someone who isn't an addict is patronising. I know it "makes sense" but if it were that easy there would be no alcoholics. From an addict it's a different story - they are just as strong as you or me, and just as weak when it comes to their drug of choice, so it's comforting from an addict. They know how hard it is, and so there's a power behind the words. From a non-addict it's just not the same.

I think it's a great idea to speak to someone about it.

Hang in there :ghug3

CarolD

You are not a failure.
You were brave ...next time you will be darn courageous!

:Mega

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