Déjà Vu - Being Proactive, Advice Appreciated
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Gravity out of town meetings I have found awesome, looks like you are hanging in there. Grab the phone bakk and call the local hotline, I am sure they can hook you up with some meetings and some fellowship as well.
where the light is
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 2,763
So Far, So Good
Back in my hotel room. I had an excellent day despite being really tired. I managed to follow through on my little plan! A very good work day, a light workout, shopping (DVD’s), coffee at Starbucks, and…drum roll…an AA meeting 
! My first one out of town and without my sponsor for moral support! Super nervous going in but I chatted with a couple of guys, actually shared a bit, picked up good words about forgiving myself, and empathy about being a guy alone on the road. It was actually quite different than the meetings at home – more formal, very specific topic, shorter shares. I actually owe you folks a bit for this one – you were right about going. A big part of me didn’t want to go but I really wanted to write this post. Here at SR, I try to reply to people who are worried about their first AA meeting to take a deep breath and do it – that’s just what I did!
In my prayer this morning, I asked the Creator to give me the strength & clarity to do what I am supposed to do today. After my prayer, the first thought that came to me was to work hard and just do my best. Before I left home, I told my wife the only thing I have to do perfectly is to not have that first drink - everything else will work itself out. I’m smoking more than usual, tried to eat well (too much coffee, cinnamon bun at Starbucks, sorry Seren
), a bit cranky (tired) but sober!
I have to be careful. There are people partying in the hotel right now & some of my colleagues are likely out & about. I don’t feel bulletproof and I know that I am only a short walk or a cell phone call away from a drink. I have to get through the next few hours before I can call this day done – just typing this is helping to get me through the evening. Going to hang around SR, listen to my iPod, call my sponsor, have dinner, and put a plan together for tomorrow.
I know that I owe my strength to the Creator and the resources provided to me – other alcoholics & people who understand. Thank you. I’m very grateful. D
! My first one out of town and without my sponsor for moral support! Super nervous going in but I chatted with a couple of guys, actually shared a bit, picked up good words about forgiving myself, and empathy about being a guy alone on the road. It was actually quite different than the meetings at home – more formal, very specific topic, shorter shares. I actually owe you folks a bit for this one – you were right about going. A big part of me didn’t want to go but I really wanted to write this post. Here at SR, I try to reply to people who are worried about their first AA meeting to take a deep breath and do it – that’s just what I did!In my prayer this morning, I asked the Creator to give me the strength & clarity to do what I am supposed to do today. After my prayer, the first thought that came to me was to work hard and just do my best. Before I left home, I told my wife the only thing I have to do perfectly is to not have that first drink - everything else will work itself out. I’m smoking more than usual, tried to eat well (too much coffee, cinnamon bun at Starbucks, sorry Seren
), a bit cranky (tired) but sober!I have to be careful. There are people partying in the hotel right now & some of my colleagues are likely out & about. I don’t feel bulletproof and I know that I am only a short walk or a cell phone call away from a drink. I have to get through the next few hours before I can call this day done – just typing this is helping to get me through the evening. Going to hang around SR, listen to my iPod, call my sponsor, have dinner, and put a plan together for tomorrow.
I know that I owe my strength to the Creator and the resources provided to me – other alcoholics & people who understand. Thank you. I’m very grateful. D
where the light is
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 2,763
Home
I’m home! The group I was working with decided to end our work session a day early. My family is sound asleep knowing dad is home, I’m sober, I feel at peace…can’t ask for anything more!
For a couple of hours last night (9 to 11 PM – the time I used to head out) I was getting a little out of focus. The hotel was noisy, room was too hot, Friday night - everybody else partying but I can’t because I’m an alcoholic…poor me! While I did not have any notable urge to drink, that kind of selfish thinking is the first step towards saying “to hell with it…I’m going for a beer, I deserve it.”. But my little tantrum passed, I had a half-decent nights’ sleep, a great work day & a good drive home (an oncoming semi veered ½ way into my lane at 60 mph, thank God I was paying attention – I was ready to hit the ditch).
The past 3 days have been a valuable learning experience. The big lesson I learned is to try to remain humble, accept that I am still learning to live a sober life, and always ask for help. I don’t know everything I need to know (nor will I ever) and my thinking isn’t always sound. The help I received from this thread alone: courage to go to an out of town AA meeting, great advice on my step work, have a back up plan, tips on keeping myself sharp, prayers, laughs, encouragement, and genuine caring. Unbelievable! Add this to my prayers, calls to my sponsor & family, the AA meeting (the words & the people), and just keeping busy…this is what I needed to do to stay sober. And it’s all positive stuff, not any kind of burden at all.
Again, thank you so much for your help. All my best. D
For a couple of hours last night (9 to 11 PM – the time I used to head out) I was getting a little out of focus. The hotel was noisy, room was too hot, Friday night - everybody else partying but I can’t because I’m an alcoholic…poor me! While I did not have any notable urge to drink, that kind of selfish thinking is the first step towards saying “to hell with it…I’m going for a beer, I deserve it.”. But my little tantrum passed, I had a half-decent nights’ sleep, a great work day & a good drive home (an oncoming semi veered ½ way into my lane at 60 mph, thank God I was paying attention – I was ready to hit the ditch).
The past 3 days have been a valuable learning experience. The big lesson I learned is to try to remain humble, accept that I am still learning to live a sober life, and always ask for help. I don’t know everything I need to know (nor will I ever) and my thinking isn’t always sound. The help I received from this thread alone: courage to go to an out of town AA meeting, great advice on my step work, have a back up plan, tips on keeping myself sharp, prayers, laughs, encouragement, and genuine caring. Unbelievable! Add this to my prayers, calls to my sponsor & family, the AA meeting (the words & the people), and just keeping busy…this is what I needed to do to stay sober. And it’s all positive stuff, not any kind of burden at all.
Again, thank you so much for your help. All my best. D
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,576
I'm so happy for you gravity - you did it! Each time we face one of these challenges and come through them with no harm done, it makes us that much stronger when the next hurdle comes. You are now armed with the knowledge that you CAN do this! So glad you're home safe & sound. Sleep well.
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