Fishy226

But, I ordered some sushi from the restaurant downstairs and it wasn't ready, would be 10 more minutes, so I ordered a glass of wine...then another...then I bought some wine on the way home. I guess being hopeful that I could only have just the glass of wine then go home is not working

Stressful day (more than usual) but that will always happen.....Nice quiet bar..dark..

ugh.

fishy

Anna

Oh yes, I used to have those hopes too and tried for ages to make it work. I found in the end, it was so much easier to make the decision to stop completely.

Fishy226

thanks..i thought that i would just have the 2 glasses then go home an eat the dinner i bought.....not so. i'm pretty disappointed in myself.

barb dwyer

hi Fishy -

best to use it as a learning experience - that whole as alcoholics we are powerless over that first drink thing ... and start over.

If you really want it, that is.

tanyapmc

One is too many, one thousand never enough.

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off. tomorrow is a new day.

Fishy226

of course i do...is there something i said that would make you think that i wouldn't?

Pinkcuda

No, it not something you said. It's something you did. Did anyone explain the rules to you??

CarolD

Day one is better than Day Zero....
many of us had false starts on our sober journey.

Blessings

Fishy226

no, they didn't.

Hope

Tomorrow is a new day for a fresh start. Pick yourself back up and try again.
Chalk this up to a bad experience but one that taught you that valuable lesson of one is too many.

calfritch

i spent months trying to make the first drink my only drink...now its making club soda my only drink, at bars anyways.

Fishy226

Thanks you guys. I was afraid to log on here to read the replies.

Pinkcuda - I don't know what rules you mean.

I woke up this morning feeling so horrible. Ironic thing is is that bar/restaurant is right downstairs in the same building as my office and I have never had a drink there before and I've been in that building now for 6 months. I don't know what I was thinking. I was so stupid - I had an all day (2 day) arguement with someone I work with and had just gotten in a major verbal altercation with this person. I felt okay - but I guess I wasn't. I guess that is another thing - to keep our feelings in check. A lot of the time I'm not totally aware when I'm as upset as I really am...if that makes any sense. I have been down there in that restaurant so many times ordering dinner and not once have I even thought of a drink...until last night. ugh.

Pinkcuda

The rules are easy. You can't quit sometimes. With our type a drink is like a Lays potato Chip. Nobody eats just one!
You said;
"I guess being hopeful that I could only have just the glass of wine then go home is not working"
Turning down from the first drink is difficult sometimes. Turning down the second is out of the question. Those are the rules.

Fishy226

Ah! Got it Thank you...

Budd

Good luck on your fresh start.

parentrecovers

welcome back, fishy. support, k

Fishy226

thank you you guys...i really appreciate it. so i'm back at the gate today..no more false starts...

what is the acronym they use at AA...something about triggers...being hungry, tired, etc..?

it's so true..when i get hungry and tired i'm so much more prone to having a drink. especially when i don't eat...like last night..i hadn't eaten anything all day and i was exhausted...and i know when i skip meals that that is such a trigger for me....i was anxious from the arguement (which has never happened to me in my whole career - i've never gotten into an arguement like i did yesterday with someone)...anyway..poor decision. and the guy i was arguing with was trying to apologize and he said when the situation is all over we will go and knock down a keg together...right...so that is another question..what do you say when people at work want to go get a drink with you? i often have to go out to dinner...i work with all men and they all get martini's and order expensive wine...i feel like i need to keep up with them sometimes. although i never drink at work and they always have beer on friday afternoons...i just don't go out there and socialize with them...anyway...thank you for the support. andy advice on this would be great...

fishy

Fishy226

Hey Wander - yes, it does quite suck to have to give up something you really like. And I really love to go out to those dinners and drink martini's and hundred dollar bottles of wine! and i really love to come home and open a bottle of wine and unwind...i found my drive home to be quite fun last night after my two glasses...I enjoyed the music much more...i do really like all of that stuff....but i really hate being hungover...and i really hate my side hurting all of the time...and i really hate sleeping all weekend to make up for being hungover all week..i really hate waking up in the morning and looking at my phone to see who i called..then my text messages...and then trying to make up excuses for them....and i really hate being more inclined to open a bottle of wine than to take my precious dogs for a walk in the evening. i walked my dogs every night this week - something we haven't done in a long time...they were so happy all week...that made me so happy....my hangover today does not make me happy. i would rather be happy and not drink.

thank you for the encouragement....

fishy

Tazman53

Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired
HALT

I say sure, why not, last time I checked coke and ised teas are drinks. I will say though that in early sobriety going to a bar is not a good idea, the urge to drink has been lifted from me as promised. In early sobriety maybe you could suggest drinks over dinner instead and simply drink coke or what ever, I was surprised at how few people even noticed I was not drinking.

Fishy, just take it one day at a time, if you have a network of sober friends call them when you get the urge to drink. If you are in AA then call your sponsor, before I was finally able to stay stopped I had become willing to do what ever it took to get and stay sober, until I reached that point in my drinking I was never able to stay stopped.

Captain Kirk

Fishey,
You need to ask yourself where and why did you fall off the wagon; and what could you have done to prevent this from happening.
Now you also need to make your new plan of action and start again.
Take care.