HELP...9 days...first melt-down
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 8
HELP...9 days...first melt-down
Hi. New here. Not sure where to turn but I figured this was a start. I'm nine days sober and have been doing quite well, considering. Not many cravings and the ones I do have a short lived so I just ride them out. I've been having a good day until a little bit ago. Went to get a bunch of vitamins that I'm using to help adjust the biochemical aspect of my body (supposed to help cravings and replensish your body with the stuff alcohol depleted), came home, and the phone rang. My mother in law, who I really do love (and like) calls to say that she is in town and about 10 minutes away; wants to take me an my husband to dinner. Innocent enough except that she lives 5 hours away (not a quick road-trip!) and the house looks like a bomb went off in it (house-cleaning day is Sunday unless I KNOW someone is coming over).
This situation has been a HUGE source of stress in our marriage over the last few years. I think it is rude to just show up anyway regardless of how far away you live, but to call when you are 10 minutes away???? OMG?
OK...need to calm down. So anyway, my husband doesn't understand how much this upsets me. When I was high all the time, I just got mad, but tonight, I just lost it. I was picking up some clothes and putting them in the hamper (and trying to clean the kitchen, vaccuum the floor, etc.) when I just fell to the floor of my closet and started sobbing. I couldn't breath either. I guess it was a panic attack but I can't remember the last time I did this sober or drunk. What the heck is going on? I was fine one minute and the first big stressor I lose it!!!
I had a closed bottle of wine in my house that belongs to a friend down the street. I just hadn't got it back to her so I called her in a panic and asked her to come get it right away. Fortunately she was home and knows about my quitting so she came right over.
Help!!!
This situation has been a HUGE source of stress in our marriage over the last few years. I think it is rude to just show up anyway regardless of how far away you live, but to call when you are 10 minutes away???? OMG?
OK...need to calm down. So anyway, my husband doesn't understand how much this upsets me. When I was high all the time, I just got mad, but tonight, I just lost it. I was picking up some clothes and putting them in the hamper (and trying to clean the kitchen, vaccuum the floor, etc.) when I just fell to the floor of my closet and started sobbing. I couldn't breath either. I guess it was a panic attack but I can't remember the last time I did this sober or drunk. What the heck is going on? I was fine one minute and the first big stressor I lose it!!!
I had a closed bottle of wine in my house that belongs to a friend down the street. I just hadn't got it back to her so I called her in a panic and asked her to come get it right away. Fortunately she was home and knows about my quitting so she came right over.
Help!!!
believer
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Europe
Posts: 2,411
Well first Congratulations on your sobriety..It is something to be proud..Welcome to the forum..There's so much support here..There are people with amazing stories here, extremely supportive and who understand what you're going through..
I can relate to the family problem...Only thing i can tell you is don't let it get to you, cuz it can, and it can leave you completely miserable....When i finally started making a clear point, saying things once and making people understand i was serious, things changed..i went from begging to being treated the way i should...
keep posting..welcome..glad to have you here..!
I can relate to the family problem...Only thing i can tell you is don't let it get to you, cuz it can, and it can leave you completely miserable....When i finally started making a clear point, saying things once and making people understand i was serious, things changed..i went from begging to being treated the way i should...
keep posting..welcome..glad to have you here..!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,516
Hi Tawny,
Welcome!
One thing I knew I had to do when I started in recovery was to learn how to say "No" and mean it. It sounds like you need some boundaries for yourself with regards to your mother-in-law. I used to be a people-pleaser and it's also called 'the disease to please'. And, it is a disease because it makes you sick. It sounds like you're doing well and I'm glad you found us for support and information.
Welcome!
One thing I knew I had to do when I started in recovery was to learn how to say "No" and mean it. It sounds like you need some boundaries for yourself with regards to your mother-in-law. I used to be a people-pleaser and it's also called 'the disease to please'. And, it is a disease because it makes you sick. It sounds like you're doing well and I'm glad you found us for support and information.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
You did great when you got the wine out.
When you have time...check out
http://www.tlctx.com/ar_pages/paw_part1.htm
Well done on your sober time
....Welcome to SR
When you have time...check out
http://www.tlctx.com/ar_pages/paw_part1.htm
Well done on your sober time
....Welcome to SR
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