sherbear5104

Good morning, my friends. It does feel good to be back. Every day I feel a little better about myself. Prayer, meetings, and SR. With these 3 things, I have the chance, as we all do, to make a miracle happen. I forgot how much I missed being clean. It really is a great feeling.

I do know the basics of recovery. I have learned why I picked up. Now I just need to get it from my head, to my heart.

parentrecovers

head to heart - that's a big one.. good for you for realizing that's what you have to do!

sherbear5104

I went to another meeting last night. I heard a wonderful speaker. She told half of my story. I liked it when she said "you don't have to ride the elevator all the way to the bottom, it stops on several floors." I would like to get off on this floor. I don't want to know what's waiting in the basement for me!

Rowan

I hear ya, Sher!
another one I like is that we don't have to take the bus all the way to the dump.

sherbear5104

yeah, i don't want to go to the dump either!

sherbear5104

Good morning friends. What a long night it was. I had using dreams all night. I forgot how powerful they are. I tossed and turned. It took me a while to realize that prayer might help. Once I did that, I was able to sleep for a few hours. Until I dreampt that my s/o was cheating on me. This disease is powerful and tricky. It kept telling me to just go get a joint or a beer. They aren't as bad as the cocaine. Ha! That's what I relapsed on. Just a joint. I can handle smoking pot. DENIAL. One thing will lead to another. I've already researched this. So, just for today, I will not use any drug.

parentrecovers

you know, i've been happily married for 15 years. but every once and awhile, i have dreams about my husband cheating. he never has..

i wake up and slug him and call him a cheater, then go back to sleep

it's odd.

hang in, bear - k

sherbear5104

That put a smile on my face. Thanks. I think I'll pass on slugging him, though. He's been a big help. He's in recovery also.

parentrecovers

it's more of a "love pat" slug - but it does bring him out of a dead sleep...

good that you have a good partner in recovery, something to be grateful for today - k

sherbear5104

I think a "love slug" is the appropriate term! LOL

parentrecovers

long live love slugs!

sherbear5104

If my smilies were working, it would show the dancing banana. I am in such a better mood now. I feel like dancing.

Astro

You two just gave me a huge smile!

indigo

Welcome home, glad you've come back, you can do it.

sherbear5104

Good morning friends. Still here, going one day at a time. Saturday was one hour at a time and I couldn't get online. I did get to a meeting, though. I'm glad that I didn't lose my tools. They got a little rusty, but I've been cleaning them up.

Ann

I remember you too, Sher, as a matter of fact you have been in my prayers for quite a long time. It's so good to see you reaching out and just know that there are many hands here to help you up and hold the light until you find yours again.

This has always been one of my favourite prayers, today I say it for you. Welcome home...

Refuse to fall down.
If you cannot refuse to fall down,
refuse to stay down.
If you cannot refuse to stay down
lift your heart toward heaven
and like a hungry beggar,
ask that it be filled,
and it will be filled.
You may be pushed down.
You may be kept from rising.
But no one can keep you from lifting
your heart toward heaven — only you.
It is in the middle of misery that
so much becomes clear.
The one who says nothing good came of this,
is not yet listening.

a prayer - clarissa pinkola estés

sherbear5104

That just brought a tear to my eye. In a good way. It's a great prayer. This is a great place. I'm glad to be HOME.