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Old 07-01-2007, 11:15 AM   #1 (permalink)

Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Houston, TX
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Starting Out

Hi, I'm new here. In fact, this is my day one. I was wondering if I could get some advice. It seems like some people have it a lot worse than I do, but I'm still scared and really embarrassed about this whole thing. Is it possible to get through this without meetings? I really, really don't want anyone I know, to know. Also, my friends always make jokes about my drinking or get mad at me when I say something inappropriate but then they tell me that I'm more fun when drunk. The sad thing is that it's true, I'm boring when sober. Has anyone else felt that way? And last, but not least, I work in a lot of politics and networking which almost always involves cocktails. How can I say no and not draw attention to myself? How do you say no when you're around it so much.

Sorry for the long post and thank
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Old 07-01-2007, 12:36 PM   #2 (permalink)
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It seems like some people have it a lot worse than I do,
That's because you're probably in the early stages of the disease. If you're an alcoholic, it will progress. In AA, there is a term often heard. "Yet". As in, I've never been arrested (yet), or I've never lost a job (yet).

Forget for now what life will be like after you sober up. Just focus on getting sober, everything else will be clear to you after a while.

I couldn't do it without AA. I tried everything, and the harder I tried to do it on my own, the more I got beat up by alcohol. Hopefully you won't have to have the beating administered to you that I did before you realize that "you're way" wont work.

Give it a try. A whole hearted, open, honest approach. Go routinely (daily) for maybe 30 days. Listen. Talk to others before and after the meetings, you'll be surprised. I was.

BTW, I have over 8 months right now. And I'm happier than I've ever been. I was a daily, 24 x 7 drinker that needed to drink every 2 hours to keep from withdraw starting. I know, you're not there......yet.
Life Happens

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Old 07-01-2007, 03:38 PM   #3 (permalink)
everything is already ok
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Welcome Juji

Congrats on day one thatas a huge start!

I have over two years drug and Alcohol free. Early days where difficult and I had no idea where I was going, best thing I ever did was get help by going to meetings and do what was suggested.

Today I have problems but they are golden nad promise change. I have a good life and enjoy being sober, it never occurs to me anymore what I might say if asked for a drink, I simply say no thanks.

...And like a bird that's on the wing and is flying free
He can hear the song of home endlessly
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Old 07-01-2007, 04:26 PM   #4 (permalink)
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but I'm still scared and really embarrassed about this whole thing. Is it possible to get through this without meetings? I really, really don't want anyone I know, to know.
First of all, would you be embarrassed if you had cancer, or diabetes (sp?), or any of a number of other diseases? You have a disease called alcoholism, and the only way to arrest it is by total abstinence...that should include many other drugs, as well.

Second, the only way I've had any experience with stopping is through attending lots of AA meetings, "networking" with phone numbers of other recovering alcoholics, and utilizing everything the AA program has to offer.

Third, you're only kidding yourself if you think others don't know...they may be reluctant to label you an alcoholic; but, actually, you're the only one who can make that admission--to yourself, or to anyone else with whom you choose to share that knowledge.

Fourth, "Just Say No", works with alcohol, too. Say it often enough (no explanation necessary), and eventually folks will get the just don't feel like drinking. It's really easier than you think...and, the longer you're alcohol free, the easier it gets.
He's coming to town... ...via the Polar Express!!!
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Old 07-01-2007, 04:28 PM   #5 (permalink)

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there is a lot of info here....more friends will come...i can tell you that there are a lot of answers here and many chances for you to dig in....

I think sober is always matter what...sober is reality...

stay strong
the biggest power a being is given is the now. in the now there is will, choice and therefore a power with no boundaries; for what is born from pure love has no seasons, only continuity, then growth. your spirit will tell you the truth. there's a silence within the silence.
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Old 07-01-2007, 04:32 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Hi Juji,


One thing I would say is that getting and staying sober is hard and it needs to be a priority in your life. Sometimes that means changing things in your life that are difficult to change. For me, that meant leaving some people behind when I moved on and meeting new people. And, for me, I would not have been able to be around alcohol when I first stopped drinking. It was too stressful. If you're in such a situation, saying 'no thanks' is all that needs to be said.

AA works for many people, but it's not the only way to get sober.

Here is a link to other resources:
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

Marianne Williamson
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Old 07-01-2007, 04:56 PM   #7 (permalink)
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
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Welcome to SR!

Please check out....

Each Day Sober Is A Victory!!
Joy In AA Recovery!

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Old 07-01-2007, 05:30 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I would advise checking out an AA meeting or two. Maybe in another town if it means that much too you. Alcoholism is a deadly disease. You may not be have gotten as bad as some of us "YET". Give it time you will. Please get a little help, and keep coming back.
It works if you work it
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