buckshot

Here I sit feeling stressed and depressed after another weekend. I realize that I probably have a drinking problem. The thing that bothers me the most is that when I drink, my judgment is SEVERELY compromised. I am tired of waking up on weekends and feeling guilty about very POOR decisions I made, especially the insane amount of money I spent. I think most of this has come in light that I am addicted to the social/party scene. I cannot stay in on a weekend without going to a bar. I am great all week long, but then the weekend arrives and I feel powerless. I am in a 12 program for codependency right now to help deal with my loneliness, but I do not know what to do.

I really do not know if I can handle the anxiety of walking into an AA meeting. I have been once a few years ago, as I was forced to go or lose my job. I have a copy of the big book which I am starting to read.

I would really appreciate your advice and/or suggestions.

CarolD

Hmm..You are fortunate to live in a city.

When I began AA I lived in Washington D.C.
I found a group that was mostly singles
and we had a blast getting /staying sober together.

During my 3 years in that group...we went for coffee
after a meeting.. lunched..attended AA dances..rented a
car for out of town meetings..hiked..went to the theater..
movies were a weekend happening.

I think of that time as "AA dating"
meaning we did things together..no pairing off.

And we started Step work..AA service work..called each
other when we hit a snag..
We stayed sober!!

I suggest you find a Friday and/or Saturday night group
and check it out.

SarahOfTheShot

Hi BuckShot,

I am a weekend binger, there were weekends where I spent $100's on alcohol between going to the bars and at home. Going out is insanely expensive, so I slowed that down and started drinking more at home....I've still spent ridiculous amounts of money and made many poor decisions. Like you, I also do fine during the weekdays, but the weekends....whoeeeyyyy, watch out...it's on.

BUT - I AM 2 weekends sober today. 14 days of sobriety total. I feel fantastic, you can do this!

You've made a good start, I know where you are right now...and it's freaking and expect ALOT of emotion, anxiety and depression if you do in fact decide to quite drinking all together. It's hard at first, but I am feeling better every single day and THAT is incentive enough for me.

Good luck, hang in there and this board rocks!
S

GlassPrisoner

Hey Buckshot !

The anxiety of an AA meeting is nothing compared to the shear panic you may feel later on as the disease progresses.

I'm a loner. Shy and introverted by nature. However I have also always been very self-reliant. If I can walk into a roomfull of strangers and ask for help, anyone can.

(Note: I actually walked. 2 miles. While still de-toxing !)