Alcoholic/Addict daughter in rehab
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 15,540
Alcoholic/Addict daughter in rehab
My daughter, got her 1st DUI at age 18. That was followed by assault charges filed by a college roommate he same year, with alcohol involved. She has struggled with her alcohol and drug issues throughout college. Her natural father was an alcoholic, and he died this past August from liver and kidney failure. A big downward spiral in her efforts to fight her disease, she gave up.
This past summer at home, between semesters at school, was a nightmare. Stealing, AWOL, taking my car without permission, depression, on and on. She was arrested on her 2nd DUI on September 21st. A complete blackout. Her alc level was very high, and she tested positive for pot and cocaine. Police have not yet charged her with drug use, but she has 10 charges against her including reckless driving, hit and run, all misdemeanor charges but serious. My husband and I do not know, having seen the car, how she survived. Or did not kill someone else. She traveled over 2 miles taking out everything in the path with police following her before she hit an inbankment and was stopped. It's a miracle, we are lucky to have her.
Following the accident, she entered inpatient rehab on her own accord, with encouragment from my husband and I, her lawyer, family, doctors. She is 35 days sober, and we are all grateful for that.
Her plan after rehab is to return home, work her program, and work part-time once she gets her routine established. She'd like to finish school next Fall (she only has 19 hours until her degree.)
Is any of this similar to what you've been through? What age is your A and does he/she live at home? How did you establish boundaries for being home? Have you gone through relapses?
I feel like all I do is ask questions these days I have started attending Alanon and I'm reading and listening. Very confused right now though..
Thank you for listening, K
This past summer at home, between semesters at school, was a nightmare. Stealing, AWOL, taking my car without permission, depression, on and on. She was arrested on her 2nd DUI on September 21st. A complete blackout. Her alc level was very high, and she tested positive for pot and cocaine. Police have not yet charged her with drug use, but she has 10 charges against her including reckless driving, hit and run, all misdemeanor charges but serious. My husband and I do not know, having seen the car, how she survived. Or did not kill someone else. She traveled over 2 miles taking out everything in the path with police following her before she hit an inbankment and was stopped. It's a miracle, we are lucky to have her.
Following the accident, she entered inpatient rehab on her own accord, with encouragment from my husband and I, her lawyer, family, doctors. She is 35 days sober, and we are all grateful for that.
Her plan after rehab is to return home, work her program, and work part-time once she gets her routine established. She'd like to finish school next Fall (she only has 19 hours until her degree.)
Is any of this similar to what you've been through? What age is your A and does he/she live at home? How did you establish boundaries for being home? Have you gone through relapses?
I feel like all I do is ask questions these days I have started attending Alanon and I'm reading and listening. Very confused right now though..
Thank you for listening, K
Raised from the Dead
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Chicago
Posts: 376
wow yeah that reminds me of my story alot. at 18-19 i was completely out of control with drugs and the summer in between freshman year of college was horrific for my parents. stealing, taking the car without permission, uninterrupted binges on drugs of all kinds....it was terrible. at the time (circa 1999-2000) we were heavily into going to raves and i looked everybit as sick as i was.
during my 3rd semester of school i was robbed at gunpoint in my dorm room (i was selling drugs) and forced to come home. i was immediately forced into outpatient and kwas icked out the first week for using drugs. my parents threw me out and i moved in with my friends family. about a month into that i OD'd and woke up in the hospital where my family did a bedside intervention. i agreed to go to impatient and was released with 30 days clean.
when i got home i immediately fell in with the same crowd and went on a 5-year run that ended with me basically dying from heroin addiction. finally i couldnt take it anymore and entered AA and today is my 9th month anniversary.
keep the faith!! God has a plan for your child.
during my 3rd semester of school i was robbed at gunpoint in my dorm room (i was selling drugs) and forced to come home. i was immediately forced into outpatient and kwas icked out the first week for using drugs. my parents threw me out and i moved in with my friends family. about a month into that i OD'd and woke up in the hospital where my family did a bedside intervention. i agreed to go to impatient and was released with 30 days clean.
when i got home i immediately fell in with the same crowd and went on a 5-year run that ended with me basically dying from heroin addiction. finally i couldnt take it anymore and entered AA and today is my 9th month anniversary.
keep the faith!! God has a plan for your child.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 73
Parentrecovers,
Your story makes me think of the terrible things I have done to my parents. I have lied to them to keep my drinking lifestyle in tact. I have blamed them for my misfortunes. I have been a really horrible person for all my opportunistic and manipulative behavior. I hope your daughter will soon realize what a loving parent she has in you. She is still young, she can bounce back from addiction fairly unscathed. I wish I had addressed my alcoholism in college. I would be in a much better position now (I am 30). After I had serious incidents, my parents took me in enforced curfews. I was a good boy for a few weeks, then I was out on my own living the same old life. I would suggest organizing some activities where she can regain some of her lost innocence. Perhaps, you could repeat some of the activities you two enjoyed when she was younger.
Cubbie
Your story makes me think of the terrible things I have done to my parents. I have lied to them to keep my drinking lifestyle in tact. I have blamed them for my misfortunes. I have been a really horrible person for all my opportunistic and manipulative behavior. I hope your daughter will soon realize what a loving parent she has in you. She is still young, she can bounce back from addiction fairly unscathed. I wish I had addressed my alcoholism in college. I would be in a much better position now (I am 30). After I had serious incidents, my parents took me in enforced curfews. I was a good boy for a few weeks, then I was out on my own living the same old life. I would suggest organizing some activities where she can regain some of her lost innocence. Perhaps, you could repeat some of the activities you two enjoyed when she was younger.
Cubbie
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