amymarie

Hi all...been awhile but here I am, back in the zone...well except for this seemingly sudden anger. For the past week I have felt so much rage. I got into a fight with my P... a serious angry argument...for no reason at all...
I feel as though I am falling apart...life isnt so unbearable right now. All has been going along very well indeed... but I am afraid now I am trying to pick fights just to have a reason to scream...I literally want to pull out my hair...I get these raging "flashes" and want to be completely absorbed by the space around me. It isnt constant- only occasionally...but man...when it happens....watch out! It is going on right now...fyi...feels like when my p gets home I will start a fight...what gives????????

Bozo

Is one of the most difficult emotion for any alkie to handle or understand.

I dont have a clue what causes it let alone what to do with it when it happens.

I snap at my wife a kids way too often. And sometimes for no apparent reason.

Now here is the sticking point. If I dont do something about my angry feelings, and stuff them, I become very depressed.

Cant win can you? Maybe we are overexaggerating our problems, but I dont think so.

Hang in there Amy, maybe youre pissed at yourself for drinking again, Happens to a lot of us.

I have to pray that self will be removed from me first. Then I have to pray for the willingness to go to meetings again. Then I have to, I must, focus on my four cornerstones of sobriety, honesty, humility, prayer, gratitude.

It is the only thing that keeps me halfway sane and functioning.

Try to enjoy the day today. Its all we got.

bikewench

Amy...
Welcome back...

Yeah...
I have the rage thing as well.
Sometimes I simply have to warn everyone off...
sometimes I have to shut myself in a room until I can work past it.
And sometimes I spew.
The important thing for me to remember is to clean up my crap after though...
A sincere amends and sharing around the state I am in helps all to work through it...


Rage/Anger is one of the stages of grieving...
And most of us don't/won't recognize that we have much grieving backed up in there...

I wrote a lot...
talked it out on here...
rode my bike.. hard...
cried... lots...

We have to give ourselves room and permission to set our psyche's free .. so that they can heal ...
Cause if we'd just get out of our own way... ;o)

amymarie

the rage has passed...
In it's place; pure insanity! I go from happy to sad to crazy to lovie-dovie to anxious to sleepy...in about..oh...2 min....
but hey, the rage is gone...knocking them down one at a time!

helpus

That's what I feel like right now on wellbutrin, yuck see post. Going off it now. I also had those feelings a few years ago and it was my thyroid. My TSH levels were almost non existent making me feel like an unconrolable loon. But wone I got my levels back to normal, I was fine. So a thyroid blood test is an inexpensive thing for the doc to check.

amymarie

Helpus,

I was on Welbutrin for a very short stint...I am now on Lithium and don't really know if it's any better at all. Each time it gets upped, I seem to have these (or similar) rollercoaster emotions...I haven't had the rage before - at least not in sobriety, but I will be talking to a Dr. about it soon...
Good luck to you going off the meds...
Peace.