GreenAces

So I had always had a problem with sleeping even before I started using and drinking. But the problems began to progress (obviously) when all of that sweet partying started. It really hit me when I started smoking weed.. I would smoke it all day everyday and when I didnt have it I wouldn't be able to sleep at all.. The same thing came with alcohol, pills, and whatever else you wanted to throw my way.

So my background with AA and recovery is I started the program after a nice little bender that landed me in a suicidal state of mind and after I had called myself in to the hospital and spent 7 days in the psych ward.. out of those 7 days I was pissed off to all hell because I couldn't grasp why they put me in there.. I fought the fact that I had a problem with drugs and alcohol staying strong to the thought that it was all just a mental problem and that I needed the docs to give me more drugs to help that.. Well they obviously wouldn't give in to my begs and rants and pleads and bitch fits but did at that time perscribe me with a little anti anxiety/anti depression medication which worked until I decided I didn't need it..

But on that 6th or 7th day of being there all pissed off and bored out of my mind I decided to pick up the big book and low and behold everything I read pertained to me! hmm go figure lol So i got discharged from the hospital and found myself running to AA..

Now back to the insomnia.. I ended up going to rehab a few months after my hospital stay and I slept like a baby.. I got out and continued to stay sober... and than.. DUN DUN DUN!!!! I quit working the program.. I had a relapse here and there but for the most part stayed sober.. Than I went to my doc because I couldn't sleep worth a damn and wanted medication... So he gave me some... And oh yes it worked and it helped.. but after 3 days of taking it the right way that my doc told me to take it I began snorting them, and taking wayyyyy more than what was reccomended... So my 30 day perscription lasted about half a week.. So I went back and said it wasn't working and got a different sleep medication and did the same with that.. after going the third time and getting a different one I had had enough because it was destroying everything I was working up for, and lead me straight back to an alcohol binge that nearly cost me my career.. So I threw the last perscription out and did an inventory on what the hell I was exactly thinking and why I was doing what I was doing and got myself back in to AA where I know I belong...

I still have sleep problems from time to time but thats really mainly just all the coffee I drink at meetings lol. AA has taught me how to be content with myself moment to moment and day to day so I no longer have the anxieties that kept me up in the past...

So basically all in all, not working the program, and not working it to the best of my ability lead me down a road to sleepless nights, and near self destruction. So if it's any help to anyone else my advice would be to just continue working the steps and the program, things will fall in place where they need to be and everything does get better.. And be careful if you are perscribed a medication to help with your sleep problems because we all know with out addictive personalities that my problem with the pills although they were bad, could have lead to a much worse outcome...

So yeah.. thats just a bit of my story and my 3 cents.