AnanchelAngel

My boyfriend has been clean of needles for a year... But the last couple of times when he comes home I've been noticing track marks on his arm .. He denied doing it when I questioned him, I waited two weeks and kept noticing more marks so I asked again he told me he done it two or three times but he says its caused hes stressed .. I'm very worried, disappointed and most of all hurt.. I don't know what to do.. I really need some help...

zoso77

AnanchelAngel...

Welcome to the Board. I'm sorry that this is happening, but I'm thankful that you found us. Other members will be by in due course to greet you, but as is my wont, I've got some observations I'd like to share, too.

Here's a question. How do you know he's telling the truth about what he's shooting up? First you notice the track marks, and then you catch him in a lie. Then he cops to shooting up because he's "stressed", but how do you know for sure that it's not heroin he's injecting? How do you know it's only been "two or three times"?

As a general rule, if an addict's lips are moving, he's lying.

As for what to do, I bet you know the answer to that already but you're not in a place where you're ready to pull that particular trigger. So in lieu of that, I would fully educate yourself as to what you're up against. In the past several days alone, we've had several new members come in with stories about their opiate-addicted significant others. So the good news is you're not alone.

The bad news is it will likely get worse with your ABF before it gets better.

So learn what you can here, because the more you know, the more likely you can make the best decisions for you going forward. Keep us posted, and again, Welcome to the Board.

AnanchelAngel

I immediately assumed it was subs because that's what he had done before and heroin is very rare where we live. That's the only reason I believed him so easily . I am very young ( 19) and to be quite honest very uneducated in this sort of thing...

zoso77

Kiddo...

My youngest niece is one year older than you. So when a 19 year old comes to us, I'm immediately heartbroken.

I can tell you from experience that your situation, in all probability, is not going to end well. So the only question you have to answer is not if you're going to pull the 'chute, but when.

You have your whole life ahead of you. You have choices. F**k, we all have choices in this life. And look what your ABF's choices are. How do you expect him to be a responsible, accountable partner in a romantic relationship when he's shooting up God knows what? He's putting that first, and he's putting that ahead of his own well being.

There is a big, big world out there for you. There are possibilities out there for you. If you stay attached to this, you will not have the opportunity to explore that world and those options. And although I don't know you from a hole in the wall, I want better for you than that.

JOIE12

yes to everything that zoso wrote. I married my husband at 21. He was definitely a problem drinker. Abusive in every way. A couple of houses cars and children later ... I divorced his miserable self. No more choking, strangulation, suffocation, rapes, threats and broken bones.

I had two healthy relationships and then I met my ABF. 3 years and so much pain later ... I left.

Please see what you deserve in this world. None of us would wish this on anyone. At 19, you are far too young. I lose my breath just reading that. It's a long ugly road with lies, manipulation, destroyed dreams and so much more.

We start out thinking that we can love them enough and help them enough so that they will change and be clean. It seldom ever happens.

Please keep coming back, hugs for you dear. Joie