Rage
Rage
I am just angry tonight. I've been dealing with this nonsense for a year and have taken some really drastically appropriate steps with my AH. He has been kicked out of the house and he moved into a new place. He is currently in a day treatment program at one of the best facilities on the east coast. They asked me to stay plugged in, inviting me to the facility for meetings to discuss issues. But part of me is so angry that I just don't care. Because I feel like I want my bleeping space but I can't have it. But part of me knows that I can't just say "f it" because dcf is involved and I am counting down the hours to have him served, and I need to be in some what in the loop.
I spoke to ah today because he came over to get some stuff for his place. He was sweet on the phone but once he got in the house he started belittling me. I got my sons hair cut for picture day, but if he had done it he would have shaved it off. I got a promotion today to supervisor, but according to him I was doing it anyway so it really isn't a big deal. Oh and we had a bad weekend because he smelled like booze and kept bugging me at 2 in the morning and I was pissed, but it my fault I was angry because the therapist doesn't think I understand its a "disease".
Really mofo? Maybe if you were an active participating parent you could have gotten his hair cut the way you wanted, but you were out smoking crack. So sorry you don't get vote.
Oh and maybe I was doing the supervisor job anyway, but at least I have a job. So things like food, daycare, car payments, mortgage, REHAB, get paid despite the fact you have been robbing us blind for months. Yes, you dirtbag who traded my paid off car for drugs, and racked up a thousands of dollars on a credit card in my maiden name you stole from me.
And yes I am pissed you keep waking me up at 2 in the morning. I do EVERYTHING by myself while you are in the duck pond. So forgive me if I occasionally need to sleep.
Everyone is pushing family reconciliation but I am pushing that divorce. I don't deserve this crap. No one does! Bite me AH.
I spoke to ah today because he came over to get some stuff for his place. He was sweet on the phone but once he got in the house he started belittling me. I got my sons hair cut for picture day, but if he had done it he would have shaved it off. I got a promotion today to supervisor, but according to him I was doing it anyway so it really isn't a big deal. Oh and we had a bad weekend because he smelled like booze and kept bugging me at 2 in the morning and I was pissed, but it my fault I was angry because the therapist doesn't think I understand its a "disease".
Really mofo? Maybe if you were an active participating parent you could have gotten his hair cut the way you wanted, but you were out smoking crack. So sorry you don't get vote.
Oh and maybe I was doing the supervisor job anyway, but at least I have a job. So things like food, daycare, car payments, mortgage, REHAB, get paid despite the fact you have been robbing us blind for months. Yes, you dirtbag who traded my paid off car for drugs, and racked up a thousands of dollars on a credit card in my maiden name you stole from me.
And yes I am pissed you keep waking me up at 2 in the morning. I do EVERYTHING by myself while you are in the duck pond. So forgive me if I occasionally need to sleep.
Everyone is pushing family reconciliation but I am pushing that divorce. I don't deserve this crap. No one does! Bite me AH.
Everyone is pushing family reconciliation but I am pushing that divorce. I don't deserve this crap. No one does! Bite me AH.
Your accomplishments are wonderful and you can be very proud of yourself for all you have done to support yourself and your son. You are self-sufficient and he has nothing to bring to the table except more misery...in fact, he takes from the table and squanders it.
You get to say what is okay and what is not in your life. You get to say how you and your son will live. You don't have to stay plugged in at the day program if you don't want to. You can just tell them you pulled the plug and he's on his own.
That's a lot of words to say....your feelings are valid, you go girl!
Hugs
Chibi let it all out because that is the only way you can move forward and get YOUR life back. You can be proud that through it all you have gotten a promotion-Congratulations!!! (with all that going on in your life that is more than an accomplishment)- and you continue to be a positive in your son's life and work to keep a good life for you both. You see clearly how your AH is NOT needed in your life to make one happy (haha right) and you are making plans for a better future for your son. The only person you should be listening to is your little voice inside. YOU know what is best and no one should live with an emotionally abusive man who contributes nothing but draining one's self esteem and bank account. I hate to say this but I am going to anyway-dont let the door hit your a** on the way out!
I wish you nothing but peace, prosperity and happy days ahead. You sound like a very courageous, strong woman. Keep pushing forward. It sounds like the end to this misery is in sight for you. Oh BTW, can you turn your ringer off at night?
I wish you nothing but peace, prosperity and happy days ahead. You sound like a very courageous, strong woman. Keep pushing forward. It sounds like the end to this misery is in sight for you. Oh BTW, can you turn your ringer off at night?
World class kvetch! (Awesome!).
Reconciliation as the answer to all the world's ills?
Bullcrap!
The biggest lie perpetrated on a sentient soul is that they
somehow DESERVE this!
Hey! I killed your dog, burned your house down, and stole your
retirement. But you gave me that mean look back in 1963 so I
guess we're even, right????????
Or my personal favorite......."Mistakes were made".
Everyone who screws up wants a mulligan. Of course they do!
There is no better free lunch in the world than someone who will
let you abuse them REPEATEDLY whilst accepting whatever BS
pseudoexcuse you manage to conjure up.
Congrats on the promotion. No one gave it to you. You didn't win
it with BS..... but with PERFORMANCE.
You live in the real world.
Chibi, you are awesome.
Stay awesome.
Reconciliation as the answer to all the world's ills?
Bullcrap!
The biggest lie perpetrated on a sentient soul is that they
somehow DESERVE this!
Hey! I killed your dog, burned your house down, and stole your
retirement. But you gave me that mean look back in 1963 so I
guess we're even, right????????
Or my personal favorite......."Mistakes were made".
Everyone who screws up wants a mulligan. Of course they do!
There is no better free lunch in the world than someone who will
let you abuse them REPEATEDLY whilst accepting whatever BS
pseudoexcuse you manage to conjure up.
Congrats on the promotion. No one gave it to you. You didn't win
it with BS..... but with PERFORMANCE.
You live in the real world.
Chibi, you are awesome.
Stay awesome.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 76
You sound like you have had enough and you know what you want. Don't let anyone take that away from you by pressuring you to stay in an uncomfortable situation (in this case, reconciling with your husband). Hoping you find some peace soon.
Thanks for the support!
I was just all out of "poops" to give that day. He used them all up that weekend, and I couldn't find any more to give him. Heck even if I did find any I STILL wouldn't give them to him. He'd probably just sell them.
For my own sanity I shut his phone off. That took care of the 2 am calls. Who does that anyway? Oh, yeah addicts that aren't working their recovery.
I do recall hearing a soft thwack sound of the screen door hitting toosh as I showed him the door...
I was just all out of "poops" to give that day. He used them all up that weekend, and I couldn't find any more to give him. Heck even if I did find any I STILL wouldn't give them to him. He'd probably just sell them.
For my own sanity I shut his phone off. That took care of the 2 am calls. Who does that anyway? Oh, yeah addicts that aren't working their recovery.
I do recall hearing a soft thwack sound of the screen door hitting toosh as I showed him the door...
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