darkangel1

First im new to all this so totaly lost. I started dating a recovering Meth addict about a year ago.he had been clean for over 2 years and was still in court ordered na/as at the time. About 4 months ago we found out I was pregnant with his son. Then two weeks ago I delivered at 21 weeks our son did not make it. Last night he told be he had relapsed once because of it. What am I supposed to do I already have one kid and I don't know what the right thing to do is because I really do love him. Please give me some advice.

feeling-good

I have no advice, but I am so deeply sorry for your loss. I really hope your other half can find complete sobriety with no future relapses.

hopeful4

I am so so sorry for your loss. That is tragic.

Question for you. Is your other child his?

Meth is a very hard drug to kick. I guess in my opinion it depends on what he is doing now. Is he working a program to get well? Therapy and meetings? Is he dedicated to getting well?

My opinion depends on your answer. Your number one priority is to your child, not to him. Regardless if it is his child or not. Kids are #1. You bring them into this world and their wellbeing takes place over yours or the addict in your life.

If he is dedicated to working a program and being well is one thing. If he is simply staying clean b/c he is court ordered to do so...it will not matter at all. He has to want to be clean for his own self.

I encourage you to seek therapy and support for yourself so you can set boundaries for you and your child that you can keep.

Again, I am so so sorry for your loss.

God Bless.

Kindeyes

I am so very sorry for your loss. That must have been very very hard.

My best advice to you is to take care of you and your child.

gentle hugs
ke

darkangel1

Hopeful4 to answer your question she is not his I had her before meet but he loves her and treats her like his. He was doing both therapy and meetings now it's just meetings every once in awhile. He says he's dedicated to staying clean. I'm just not sure I can trust him because he also told me he would never use again. And thank you guys for the condolences

hopeful4

If he wants to stay clean, especially during difficult times, he has to be working a program. If you go to AA or NA meetings, it is the old timers who have been going for 20 years that are clean. Why? They keep coming!

He may love her and that is great. It is also great that if you choose to leave you would not have to fight for custody. He is a meth user. The last thing you want is to expose your child to a user. If he is truly dedicated what is he going to do to ensure it won't happen again?

As I told my husband who is an alcoholic. There will always be tragedy and pain in life. You have to find ways to cope with stress that does not include using.

God Bless.