Punished
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Indiana
Posts: 147
Punished
This New Year's Eve my husband didn't call. Because I threw him out. Earlier this week we had a blizzard and brutality cold weather.He didn't call for 4 days. Because I hung up on him when he got rude. Today is my birthday. No phone call.
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Somewhere out there
Posts: 2,249
Im so sorry you are going through this. I do want to say Happy Birthday even though it may not be a happy one. So, what are you going to do about it, if anything? Is he in full addiction? Do you have strong boundaries (it sounds like you do). What is your next step? Do you got to any meetings, have a therapist or get help for all you are dealing with? Addiction is a terrible, destructive painful disease that hurts everyone. You need to take care of YOU most importantly.
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Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
I know you are disappointed, but come on.....is this REALLY surprising? considering his "body of work" over that last many months? he just doesn't care enough. while that is extremely sad, it IS what it IS. the sooner you quit looking to him for ANYTHING, the more peace you will find.
no matter what, it IS still your birthday! another year on the planet! you are still you, you still have the children, life is good.
no matter what, it IS still your birthday! another year on the planet! you are still you, you still have the children, life is good.
Curmudgeon, Electrical Engineer, Guitar God Wannabe
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Where the mighty arms of Atlas hold the heavens from the Earth
Posts: 3,403
And how would such a phone call go? How much do you want to bet it would have degenerated into something unpleasant?
It's always important to remember that he's very, very sick. Physically, mentally, and spiritually. And because he is sick, he is incapable of things like phone calls on birthdays.
I'm sorry you're going through this. But I'm also thankful that at least he didn't ruin your birthday.
Happy Birthday,
ZoSo
It's always important to remember that he's very, very sick. Physically, mentally, and spiritually. And because he is sick, he is incapable of things like phone calls on birthdays.
I'm sorry you're going through this. But I'm also thankful that at least he didn't ruin your birthday.
Happy Birthday,
ZoSo
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Indiana
Posts: 147
Thanks everyone. I'm not surprised by this. Just hurt and I'm not even sure why I am at this point. Yes, he is a full blown opiate addict and alcoholic who will, at this point, do just about anything to get high. I have been in the program for 5 years, worked with my sponsor for 4 and have been seeing a counselor who specializes in addiction since September. The older children are seeing him, too. I have some pretty clear boundaries and when he breaks them, he's out the door.
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Another Happy Belated Birthday! I hope you did something nice for yourself for your birthday!
I'm sorry that you were disappointed.....been there many times myself. They say that expectations are pre-meditated resentments.......and I've found that to be so true.
Take care of you.
gentle hugs
ke
I'm sorry that you were disappointed.....been there many times myself. They say that expectations are pre-meditated resentments.......and I've found that to be so true.
Take care of you.
gentle hugs
ke
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