Heroin Addict Disappears - Help Me Understand
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 352
I hope you won't be offended with what I'm going to ask and I feel terrible for asking as I know you're both distantly related, but, are your feelings for him 100% platonic? Apologies in advance for any offence caused. I just got the feeling that your feelings might be a bit stronger than your usual cousin kind of feeling?
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 41
Bostongirl, you sound like a wonderful person. I would love to know you. As you can tell, this is a huge undertaking for someone younger than 50 to tackle. I took on a similar challenge about a year ago, and it tested every bit of my 50 years of life experiences.
I did everything that you are being warned not to do, made loads of mistakes, except I never willingly gave money. Unfortunately, a good addict can always find a method to convert your assets to his assets and I ended up spending a month collecting my possessions from pawn shops.
But, believe it or not, it was worth it. One of the secrets was methadone. The addict that I was helping had been using heroin for at least 10 years. By that time, their brains are so rewired that few are able to escape their addiction. Methadone saved him by taking away his cravings and allowing him to feel some bit of happiness without the heroin high.
Next, he started therapy to help with his depression and anxiety and to learn what normal people do. Then he got involved with his community, and finally he is learning how to have fun without getting high. Believe it or not, that's the hard one.
He has been clean for almost a year. He is starting to feel normal not using drugs. The first few months, however, he would dream about drugs every night. That's how ingrained it was.
The addict who I helped and your cousin have a number of things in common. What I found to be one of the most important stumbling blocks to sobriety was that he started using at a young age and never developed life skills. During his initial sober period, he just didn't know what to do with himself. I could go on for hours about his learning curve, but maybe later.
As a last point, my addict really wanted to be sober. That also was key. He would try and fail, try and fail, but this time it seems to be sticking. For now, at any rate.
My best wishes to you darling.
I did everything that you are being warned not to do, made loads of mistakes, except I never willingly gave money. Unfortunately, a good addict can always find a method to convert your assets to his assets and I ended up spending a month collecting my possessions from pawn shops.
But, believe it or not, it was worth it. One of the secrets was methadone. The addict that I was helping had been using heroin for at least 10 years. By that time, their brains are so rewired that few are able to escape their addiction. Methadone saved him by taking away his cravings and allowing him to feel some bit of happiness without the heroin high.
Next, he started therapy to help with his depression and anxiety and to learn what normal people do. Then he got involved with his community, and finally he is learning how to have fun without getting high. Believe it or not, that's the hard one.
He has been clean for almost a year. He is starting to feel normal not using drugs. The first few months, however, he would dream about drugs every night. That's how ingrained it was.
The addict who I helped and your cousin have a number of things in common. What I found to be one of the most important stumbling blocks to sobriety was that he started using at a young age and never developed life skills. During his initial sober period, he just didn't know what to do with himself. I could go on for hours about his learning curve, but maybe later.
As a last point, my addict really wanted to be sober. That also was key. He would try and fail, try and fail, but this time it seems to be sticking. For now, at any rate.
My best wishes to you darling.
Life Health Prosperity
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Louisana
Posts: 6,752
Bostongirl, what you are going through is awful, I hate that it is happening to you. Now, I hope he isn't back out using but assume the worse for your own protection. If he shows up at your home unannounced please do not let him in, do not give him any money, and under no circumstances let him use your vehicle. If he is back out using there is little you can do for him. Praying for him. 
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