relapsed.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 52
relapsed.
AH relapsed at some point this weekend. I walked down my driveway and glanced in his car and there in plain view is foil with black lines all over it. WTF!!!
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!
Of course he says "It's old." bla bla bla bla... But even I know better than that.
You would think that after so many times of relapsing that it would get less painful. Or less shocking. But it hurts more every time.
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!
Of course he says "It's old." bla bla bla bla... But even I know better than that.
You would think that after so many times of relapsing that it would get less painful. Or less shocking. But it hurts more every time.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 493
Oh Chloe - I am so sorry. I know you have heard it all before - go no contact / have firm boundaries/ don't carry the burden of the 'failure' as it is not yours to carry/ relapse is HIS business not yours.... blah blah blah blah
But it IS our business as it affects our hearts, our souls, our lives, our emotions, our feelings of 'no hope', our broken hearts.
But at some stage we have to learn to remove ourselves a little from the addict we love. That NO matter how much we love. No matter how much we PRAY for their recovery. No matter how much we plan our future based on their recovery - that this will only lead to even more heartache, sadness, loss - each and every time the addict we love relapses. The ONLY way to protect ourselves from the inevitable pain, the loss, the tears, the trauma - is to do as best as we can to DETACH. To heal ourselves. Keep reading and posting here - we are here for you.
God bless you
Lara
But it IS our business as it affects our hearts, our souls, our lives, our emotions, our feelings of 'no hope', our broken hearts.
But at some stage we have to learn to remove ourselves a little from the addict we love. That NO matter how much we love. No matter how much we PRAY for their recovery. No matter how much we plan our future based on their recovery - that this will only lead to even more heartache, sadness, loss - each and every time the addict we love relapses. The ONLY way to protect ourselves from the inevitable pain, the loss, the tears, the trauma - is to do as best as we can to DETACH. To heal ourselves. Keep reading and posting here - we are here for you.
God bless you
Lara
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Over here.
Posts: 369
sorry, chloe...i've been where you are countless times now. it's always old, or not theirs, or not what we think. but it is. for me, the relapses and lies have never stopped hurting. i'm angry, irritable, and exhausted most of the time. thing is, everyone is right...we have control over what we tolerate and what we won't. we have control over our own lives. i'm trying to drill this into my own head as i type it to you.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 250
I went through the same situation with my AH this weekend. When I asked him, he acted like he was so hurt that i would even suggest he was using. Eventually he fessed up.
I'm so sorry you are also going through this. Please remember to take care of yourself and don't let this consume you. Get out of the house, meet a friend for coffee, read a book, etc, anything to help with the stress and headaches that addictions bring to our lives.
Hugs
I'm so sorry you are also going through this. Please remember to take care of yourself and don't let this consume you. Get out of the house, meet a friend for coffee, read a book, etc, anything to help with the stress and headaches that addictions bring to our lives.
Hugs
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