Not religious BUT found MY Religion here??
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Where ALL of YOU ARE
Posts: 45
Not religious BUT found MY Religion here??
I must admit ...NO ONE WANTS to be here..but the fact that we have reason to be doesn't change so if I HAVE to be in this situation I am TRULY BLESSED to have stumbled on this site...
Never having been religious (never really thought that much about it) I now realize that having FAITH and believing in a certain religion are 2 different things...
I feel loved and supported by total strangers yet strangers who are all going thru hardships of there own with NOTHING to gain... it's an incredible feeling and in a way I feel this is my religion...
I may have questioned God & especially while going thru these horrible stages of what I feel should be a good life for me, BUT..it has to be a HIGHER POWER that even got me here period...So..I say thank you for whatever advice and support I get out of this site & I PROMISE to share any love support & wisdom I may have with all of you..
No, I have NOT heard from my AD today...but...I have HOPE...Good Night.
Never having been religious (never really thought that much about it) I now realize that having FAITH and believing in a certain religion are 2 different things...
I feel loved and supported by total strangers yet strangers who are all going thru hardships of there own with NOTHING to gain... it's an incredible feeling and in a way I feel this is my religion...
I may have questioned God & especially while going thru these horrible stages of what I feel should be a good life for me, BUT..it has to be a HIGHER POWER that even got me here period...So..I say thank you for whatever advice and support I get out of this site & I PROMISE to share any love support & wisdom I may have with all of you..
No, I have NOT heard from my AD today...but...I have HOPE...Good Night.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 598
Some people believe in coincidences. Not so me.
Years ago when my teenage son was beginning his journey with drugs, I would find myself praying for God to help him. I didn't know if there was a God or not. I grew up going to church, but I had no faith He was real. However, because I knew I was way over my head in regards to my son, I prayed. One day I sat down at the kitchen table and said to my husband that something was dreadfully wrong with our son and I had been praying for God to help him but I couldn't do it alone--he needed to pray for our son, too. It was then that I felt something I had never felt before. It was like a vibration coursing through my body from the top of my head all the way down to my feet and I "heard" these words (not audibly, but in my head) "If you want Me to help you, go back to church." I was not expecting that at all! We hadn't been to church in ten years or so.
All this to say that it was my son's drug involvement that began my faith. I have since learned that such times are not unusual. It is when we are out of control that people often seek divine help.
My faith didn't bring instant correction of all that was wrong. It just gave me something other than myself to trust. The journey my son began is still the same journey 13 years later. He seems to be managing well now and for today that is enough.
Years ago when my teenage son was beginning his journey with drugs, I would find myself praying for God to help him. I didn't know if there was a God or not. I grew up going to church, but I had no faith He was real. However, because I knew I was way over my head in regards to my son, I prayed. One day I sat down at the kitchen table and said to my husband that something was dreadfully wrong with our son and I had been praying for God to help him but I couldn't do it alone--he needed to pray for our son, too. It was then that I felt something I had never felt before. It was like a vibration coursing through my body from the top of my head all the way down to my feet and I "heard" these words (not audibly, but in my head) "If you want Me to help you, go back to church." I was not expecting that at all! We hadn't been to church in ten years or so.
All this to say that it was my son's drug involvement that began my faith. I have since learned that such times are not unusual. It is when we are out of control that people often seek divine help.
My faith didn't bring instant correction of all that was wrong. It just gave me something other than myself to trust. The journey my son began is still the same journey 13 years later. He seems to be managing well now and for today that is enough.
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Where ALL of YOU ARE
Posts: 45
I thank you for sharing and I DO feel that my AD has brought me to know a different kind of faith..up until this past year I would pray to God, Thank God & then get MAD at God if I couldn't find a missing shoe or something ridiculous like that... but I now try to make a conscious effort to Thank God..and to recognize ALL the GOOD rather than focus on what is wrong in my life...
I am still so new at all this but as I have learned in a mere 3 days..it's ok to reach out and it takes time to heal..so... that is just what I am doing & with the help of people like you to share your thoughts & feelings I will make it..Hugs to you kmangel...
I am still so new at all this but as I have learned in a mere 3 days..it's ok to reach out and it takes time to heal..so... that is just what I am doing & with the help of people like you to share your thoughts & feelings I will make it..Hugs to you kmangel...
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
There is a BIG difference between 'religious' and 'living a spiritual way of life.'
Many of us here are finding a spiritual way of life through the 12 Step program and have found a Higher Power of our own understanding.
I was raised a Catholic until I was 14 when I left the Church and haven't been back inside of one since (53 years). Unfortunately those first 14 years are the really hard ones or were back then. Those Nuns were something else.
Anyway when I found the 12 Steps I too was saying I wanted nothing to do with religion. My sponsor got me a plaque with this is on:
It helped me a lot to understand that every time I thought God (HP) had deserted me in my very worst times, that was when HP carried me. WOW.
I do understand how you feel about SR. It is just a larger representation of how one is treated when they walk into an Alanon or Naranon meeting for the first time. You have a whole bunch of friends there you just haven't met yet. Women and men who really and truly do UNDERSTAND since they have been or are going through the same thing, just like here.
The nice thing about SR is we don't meet just once or twice a week, our doors are open 24/7, 365 days a year. There is always someone checking even in our quietest times.
Glad you feel welcome here!!!!
Love and hugs,
Many of us here are finding a spiritual way of life through the 12 Step program and have found a Higher Power of our own understanding.
I was raised a Catholic until I was 14 when I left the Church and haven't been back inside of one since (53 years). Unfortunately those first 14 years are the really hard ones or were back then. Those Nuns were something else.
Anyway when I found the 12 Steps I too was saying I wanted nothing to do with religion. My sponsor got me a plaque with this is on:
Footprints in the Sand
One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.
This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.
So I said to the Lord,
"You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during
the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one
set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
you have not been there for me?"
The Lord replied,
"The times when you have
seen only one set of footprints,
is when I carried you."
Mary Stevenson
One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.
This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.
So I said to the Lord,
"You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during
the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one
set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
you have not been there for me?"
The Lord replied,
"The times when you have
seen only one set of footprints,
is when I carried you."
Mary Stevenson
I do understand how you feel about SR. It is just a larger representation of how one is treated when they walk into an Alanon or Naranon meeting for the first time. You have a whole bunch of friends there you just haven't met yet. Women and men who really and truly do UNDERSTAND since they have been or are going through the same thing, just like here.
The nice thing about SR is we don't meet just once or twice a week, our doors are open 24/7, 365 days a year. There is always someone checking even in our quietest times.
Glad you feel welcome here!!!!
Love and hugs,
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 598
A few years ago my son said to me "Mom, if I had been good, would we have not gone to church?" He hated church! I told him that God just wanted my attention and had I ignored Him that day at the kitchen table, He would have just kept at trying to get me to take notice.
There have been many crazy situations occur over the years--and many situations others would say were mere coincidences. However, I have been watching through my eyes of faith for long enough to trust that whatever happens is meant to happen.
It is an exciting and comforting way to live your life when you trust something bigger than you to be ultimately in charge. It also takes a burden off shoulders! I could write a book about these past 13 years! Wild and crazy moments, that is for sure!
There have been many crazy situations occur over the years--and many situations others would say were mere coincidences. However, I have been watching through my eyes of faith for long enough to trust that whatever happens is meant to happen.
It is an exciting and comforting way to live your life when you trust something bigger than you to be ultimately in charge. It also takes a burden off shoulders! I could write a book about these past 13 years! Wild and crazy moments, that is for sure!
Getting there!!
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
I was raised Catholic, schools and all. When I graduated high school, I became agnostic or basically tried to hide from God (or so I thought) because I always thought God was going to punish me so if I ignored him, he would hopefully ignore me.
Fast forward, I had everything I wanted but did not feel real happiness. I knew something was missing. Through some friends, I found an awesome non denominational church and on my very first time there, the message was all about the difference of being blessed vs happiness. Everything I had talked about for weeks before I went was in that message. I felt like God was speaking directly to me. My faith was reborn and started to grow.
During the height of my husband's addiction, I was laying in my bed, crying, wanting this to all be a nightmare that I could wake up from. When I woke up, I heard (not audibly) "Stop worrying, I got this." I shared it with my daughter who said "That's awesome." I questioned it later because in my mind, God needed to speak more profoundly, more sophisticated but I knew what I heard and I felt peace for the first time in a while.
The next morning I was still very anxious and fearful. I went on FB, something I rarely did. The first thing I saw was a post that said:
Dear Child,
Stop worrying! Don't you remember?? I got this.
Love, God
I showed my daughter and we both just stared at each other in amazement. I felt a peace that surpassed all understanding. I realized God spoke to me on my level. I finally decided to get out of God's way. Some how, some way, I found myself at an Alanon meeting that night. I don't even remember how I got there or how I knew how to find it. The group was amazing, so supportive and caring. I was no longer alone.
A month or so later, my husband decided to seek out recovery. It hasn't been a perfect recovery like I would have wanted but he is still trying and learning. It is his recovery but I continue to pray his faith grows.
I have no idea what the future holds. However, I do know, no matter what, I will be OK and God has a plan and all things work out for my good. God's got this.
P.S. I am not implying my prayers helped my husband seek out recovery. That's between him and God. However, I am stating with all my heart......I felt God's unconditional love for me and knew he would help me through anything.
Fast forward, I had everything I wanted but did not feel real happiness. I knew something was missing. Through some friends, I found an awesome non denominational church and on my very first time there, the message was all about the difference of being blessed vs happiness. Everything I had talked about for weeks before I went was in that message. I felt like God was speaking directly to me. My faith was reborn and started to grow.
During the height of my husband's addiction, I was laying in my bed, crying, wanting this to all be a nightmare that I could wake up from. When I woke up, I heard (not audibly) "Stop worrying, I got this." I shared it with my daughter who said "That's awesome." I questioned it later because in my mind, God needed to speak more profoundly, more sophisticated but I knew what I heard and I felt peace for the first time in a while.
The next morning I was still very anxious and fearful. I went on FB, something I rarely did. The first thing I saw was a post that said:
Dear Child,
Stop worrying! Don't you remember?? I got this.
Love, God
I showed my daughter and we both just stared at each other in amazement. I felt a peace that surpassed all understanding. I realized God spoke to me on my level. I finally decided to get out of God's way. Some how, some way, I found myself at an Alanon meeting that night. I don't even remember how I got there or how I knew how to find it. The group was amazing, so supportive and caring. I was no longer alone.
A month or so later, my husband decided to seek out recovery. It hasn't been a perfect recovery like I would have wanted but he is still trying and learning. It is his recovery but I continue to pray his faith grows.
I have no idea what the future holds. However, I do know, no matter what, I will be OK and God has a plan and all things work out for my good. God's got this.
P.S. I am not implying my prayers helped my husband seek out recovery. That's between him and God. However, I am stating with all my heart......I felt God's unconditional love for me and knew he would help me through anything.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
What's the saying.....no atheists in foxholes?
Same goes for addiction.I tried EVERYTHING else.
Everything.
Before eyes start rolling and the like----it just seemed a natural
corollary to admitting codependency is but a disease of the ego.To be
able to let go and know it's going to be OK.
Now I'm not opening up a First Nondenominational Church of SR and
volunteering my services as Pastor.....(beware foxhole conversions!),but
I think even a jerk like me has a place in God's pecking order---
(WAY in the back of the Church)
...no.....ALL the way back...(that's better!)....
keep going!.....OK,out the front door,past the sidewalk.
....BUT NOT ALL THE WAY TO THE STREET!!!!!
-(((((((So,technically,I'm not quite kicked to the curb......))))))
Did God hear my prayers for a lost soul? I'd like to
think so.
What I was doing wasn't good for her or good
for me....
I'd like to think my prayers are not any less
important than some guy that works swing shift asst mgr
@ DerWeinershnitzel.
The secret of life is knowing when to lead,when to follow,
...................and when to just get out of the way.
(and a prayer now and then can't hurt)
Same goes for addiction.I tried EVERYTHING else.
Everything.
Before eyes start rolling and the like----it just seemed a natural
corollary to admitting codependency is but a disease of the ego.To be
able to let go and know it's going to be OK.
Now I'm not opening up a First Nondenominational Church of SR and
volunteering my services as Pastor.....(beware foxhole conversions!),but
I think even a jerk like me has a place in God's pecking order---
(WAY in the back of the Church)
...no.....ALL the way back...(that's better!)....
keep going!.....OK,out the front door,past the sidewalk.
....BUT NOT ALL THE WAY TO THE STREET!!!!!
-(((((((So,technically,I'm not quite kicked to the curb......))))))
Did God hear my prayers for a lost soul? I'd like to
think so.
What I was doing wasn't good for her or good
for me....
I'd like to think my prayers are not any less
important than some guy that works swing shift asst mgr
@ DerWeinershnitzel.
The secret of life is knowing when to lead,when to follow,
...................and when to just get out of the way.
(and a prayer now and then can't hurt)
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
One of the sayings I've heard that I just love is "If you pray, why worry? If you worry, why pray?"
I grew up in a very religious home. Church three times a week...Sunday morning, Sunday evening, and Wednesday evening. It was a very evangelical upbringing. I was basically intimidated into believing......fire......brimstone.......and scared spitless.
I turned away from that......all the way.....left God and anything religious in my wake for a long time. But I always felt a spiritual connection to something.....and when that something would speak to me......I would often turn a deaf ear.
I will never be thankful that my dear son is a drug addict, but I am eternally grateful for the good things that came into my life as a direct result of his addiction. I am so grateful for finding the God of my understanding (a very different God than I feared as I was growing up) and my son's addiction is what brought me back to a spiritual way of life. Prayer and meditation has become an important part of my daily activities.
There is great peace in being able to say "I can't.......He can.......So I'll let Him."
I'm very glad that you are finding comfort and friendship here. I agree with kmangel. There are no coincidences. And as Ann often says......sometimes God's gifts come in strangely wrapped packages.
gentle hugs
ke
I grew up in a very religious home. Church three times a week...Sunday morning, Sunday evening, and Wednesday evening. It was a very evangelical upbringing. I was basically intimidated into believing......fire......brimstone.......and scared spitless.
I turned away from that......all the way.....left God and anything religious in my wake for a long time. But I always felt a spiritual connection to something.....and when that something would speak to me......I would often turn a deaf ear.
I will never be thankful that my dear son is a drug addict, but I am eternally grateful for the good things that came into my life as a direct result of his addiction. I am so grateful for finding the God of my understanding (a very different God than I feared as I was growing up) and my son's addiction is what brought me back to a spiritual way of life. Prayer and meditation has become an important part of my daily activities.
There is great peace in being able to say "I can't.......He can.......So I'll let Him."
I'm very glad that you are finding comfort and friendship here. I agree with kmangel. There are no coincidences. And as Ann often says......sometimes God's gifts come in strangely wrapped packages.
gentle hugs
ke
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 598
My son told me last year while he was still living at home with his father and me that he could see that people of faith seem to get through life more at peace and he wished he had such peace. Faith is something that has to be discovered by each individual and as much as I would like to give it to him, I can't. Being a seeker of faith is a step in the right direction, though. In the beginning he was very irritated by my new found faith, but I think he sees things a bit differently today. Someday I hope he finds his own faith as it is an awesome connection we have with other people.
Getting there!!
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
I truly believe that addiction is straight from hell, the work of the enemy. It will destroy and ravage not only the addict but the whole family and anyone else who loves them. It can be a powerful distraction from God, if we allow it to be.
Addiction had tested my faith on so many levels. There was a time I questioned God's love and I asked him over and over again "Why?" I wanted to blame God for the choices of my husband. (codependency at it's finest).
Looking back at all that I have gone through, I know it has only strengthened my faith now. There have been many blessings that were hard to see at one time. My relationship with God has grown so much, my fear is much less and I have learned a lot of me. Through the grace of God, I am starting to understand what real love is (not selfish, obsessive love), I am starting to love myself again and understand my thinking was unhealthy and needed to change. For all that, I am very thankful and feel very blessed.
If God is for us, who can be against us?
Addiction had tested my faith on so many levels. There was a time I questioned God's love and I asked him over and over again "Why?" I wanted to blame God for the choices of my husband. (codependency at it's finest).
Looking back at all that I have gone through, I know it has only strengthened my faith now. There have been many blessings that were hard to see at one time. My relationship with God has grown so much, my fear is much less and I have learned a lot of me. Through the grace of God, I am starting to understand what real love is (not selfish, obsessive love), I am starting to love myself again and understand my thinking was unhealthy and needed to change. For all that, I am very thankful and feel very blessed.
If God is for us, who can be against us?
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,698
I love this post! I can attest that it was a divine intervention for me that allowed me to see who God is. It happened when I was 20 years old. It was the first time I had ever felt any presence of Him. I was raised in an agnostic/near athiest upbringing. I have a relationship with the spiritual power of God, but not so much on organized religion. I also will testify that EVERY time I have asked for comfort and prayers from this family on SR, I have received them. Dear Hope 4 bella, we are so glad you are here and any time you feel that need for support, rest assured, you will get it.
Love,
Teresa
Love,
Teresa
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: SouthEast
Posts: 159
I grew up going to church and in our rural area they are very strict. During my childhood a teen was pregnant and she was 'kicked' out of the church. My grandmother did not watch TV and playing cards, dancing, most fun things, lol, were a sin.
At 19 a person I was very close to was murdered and I could not believe a God would let such a horrible thing happen. I was angry, and I began 'searching' for proof there was a God.
The more I read the Bible and other religious books and talked to spiritual leaders I found Faith - there is not doubt in my mind that God exists.
I still have problems with many of the church teachings, IMO there is no one true church. I also include meditation (which is considered a sin by some of our churches) and prayers with spiritual readings in my day.
I was told by my Hindu friend that we can worship any where, the church is for support and friendship. He may have a point!!
I consider myself spiritual more than religious, and also believe there is a path that we all must follow, lessons to learn. That we are not in control - I read somewhere 'life is the dance and we are the dancer'.
Most forums will not allow religious posts!
At 19 a person I was very close to was murdered and I could not believe a God would let such a horrible thing happen. I was angry, and I began 'searching' for proof there was a God.
The more I read the Bible and other religious books and talked to spiritual leaders I found Faith - there is not doubt in my mind that God exists.
I still have problems with many of the church teachings, IMO there is no one true church. I also include meditation (which is considered a sin by some of our churches) and prayers with spiritual readings in my day.
I was told by my Hindu friend that we can worship any where, the church is for support and friendship. He may have a point!!
I consider myself spiritual more than religious, and also believe there is a path that we all must follow, lessons to learn. That we are not in control - I read somewhere 'life is the dance and we are the dancer'.
Most forums will not allow religious posts!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
LMN wrote:
I truly believe that addiction is straight from hell, the work of the enemy. It will destroy and ravage not only the addict but the whole family and anyone else who loves them.
================================================== =======
I can't think of a weapon to use against a people that beats addiction.
A lot of things can hurt you kinetically,chemically,etc. Those things can
be horrible---but they are necessary risks.
There is something downright EVIL about something designed,optimized,
and targeted to destroy human souls.
Just plain,dark,EVIL. I could not objectively/accurately classify this thing without that word.
I truly believe that addiction is straight from hell, the work of the enemy. It will destroy and ravage not only the addict but the whole family and anyone else who loves them.
================================================== =======
I can't think of a weapon to use against a people that beats addiction.
A lot of things can hurt you kinetically,chemically,etc. Those things can
be horrible---but they are necessary risks.
There is something downright EVIL about something designed,optimized,
and targeted to destroy human souls.
Just plain,dark,EVIL. I could not objectively/accurately classify this thing without that word.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 598
Originally Posted by LoveMeNot 
I truly believe that addiction is straight from hell, the work of the enemy. It will destroy and ravage not only the addict but the whole family and anyone else who loves them. It can be a powerful distraction from God, if we allow it to be.
Recently I posted that another of my family members died of alcohol addiction (alcohol poisoning). He was the last of his family--his father (my brother) and mother both died recently and alcohol was a contributing factor in all their deaths. I didn't know my brother drank, but his sister-in-law said she believed he also had a drinking problem. Yes, straight from the depths of Hell. It is one thing to lose one family member to alcohol--but three--and all from the same family. That is enough to test anyone's faith. But I'm strong in my faith. I know God had nothing to do with the choices they made to turn to alcohol and not Him. We all have free will to choose what we want to do with our lives. I just grieve that they turned to alcohol to fill a very deep void in their heart--a void that only God can fill.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
I grew up in a "hellfire and damnation" church. The God of my understanding today is a loving, forgiving, God who loves all his children including His addicted ones.
I was mad at God for years...why wouldn't He listen to ME? When I had nothing left to lose I prayed and began listening to Him. I let Him lead me every day and have never been disappointed.
Today I find something spiritual in many religions and practices and take what helps me most from each one. I leave church dogma to others and just find my peace with God.
Good thread, I'm grateful for the reminder that my path is lit.
Hugs
I was mad at God for years...why wouldn't He listen to ME? When I had nothing left to lose I prayed and began listening to Him. I let Him lead me every day and have never been disappointed.
Today I find something spiritual in many religions and practices and take what helps me most from each one. I leave church dogma to others and just find my peace with God.
Good thread, I'm grateful for the reminder that my path is lit.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: SouthEast
Posts: 159
My thoughts exactly Ann!!
Originally Posted by Ann
I grew up in a "hellfire and damnation" church. The God of my understanding today is a loving, forgiving, God who loves all his children including His addicted ones.
I was mad at God for years...why wouldn't He listen to ME? When I had nothing left to lose I prayed and began listening to Him. I let Him lead me every day and have never been disappointed.
Today I find something spiritual in many religions and practices and take what helps me most from each one. I leave church dogma to others and just find my peace with God.
Good thread, I'm grateful for the reminder that my path is lit.
Hugs
I was mad at God for years...why wouldn't He listen to ME? When I had nothing left to lose I prayed and began listening to Him. I let Him lead me every day and have never been disappointed.
Today I find something spiritual in many religions and practices and take what helps me most from each one. I leave church dogma to others and just find my peace with God.
Good thread, I'm grateful for the reminder that my path is lit.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 8
It is certainly possible to feel warmth, compassion and encouragement from others during times of agony and struggle without religion, faith or belief of any sort.
However, eventually it begs the question of the source of such good feelings.
However, eventually it begs the question of the source of such good feelings.
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