ELynn

It's been 7 months since I last had contact with my XABF - I cut contact and told him to never find me, I even changed my #, my email, blocked him, and moved!! I cut contact with his immediate family and blocked them as well. I want nothing more to do with the cycle of insanity. However, him and his most resent GF broke up, which left the inevitable.. he contacted me, left me a voicemail at my job. Instant anxiety. How does one handle this? I have nothing to say to him, and am not contacting him. However, the anxiety of knowing he's near and could show up at any point is back. Do they ever vacate from your life? We were together for 4 years, and it brought me nothing but pain and sorrow day in and day out. Any thoughts or advice is appreciated

dollydo

I agree with you, do not respond. They seem to turn up over again, when things are not going their way, they revert back to their previous enablers.

In my case, my exabf eventually gave up, possibly because I ended up having to file a restraining order against him.

Try to remain calm, just stick to your no contact and block him every which way that you can.

LoveMeNow

If he leaves you another message, delete without listening! If he continues and will not stop, I would send the police to have a talk with him.

Years ago, my exbf harassed me so much after I broke up with him and left so many nasty messages that the State Attorney pressed charges. He stopped!!

He wasn't an addict but obviously had a screw loose and couldn't handle rejection very well.

gurlie214

Tell him if he ever tries to contact you again, you will call the police and file a report. Thank you and goodbye. You are doing great! Hang in there! Don;t let your guard down for a minute!

Faithlove

Welcome to SR!

Keep up your end of the No Contact.

You can't control what he does; you can control the ways you react.

Figure out ways to take care of your anxiety. Maybe venting here on SR, going to an Al-Anon meeting, taking a walk, exercising, sleeping, reading, whatever you like to do. Don't give your XABF power over how you feel.

I am very impressed at you for cutting the ties with him and maintaining all these months! Especially after being in a relationship for 4 years. Good job!!!!! Keep up your boundaries!!! (((hugs to you)))

ELynn

Thank you all, it's much appreciated. I definitely needed to vent, because it is so frustrating. Trying to find a meeting in the area too, I know that always helps. Him and I have nothing further to discuss and he brings nothing good into my life. I definitely won't let my guard down and know what I must do if he continues to contact me.