rozied

It has been a long time since I posted. My 43 yr old son was released from jail Christmas Day. This time he maxed out & was not on parole or probation.
He has been using coke since he is 21 & it has destroyed his life.
My 90yr old parents let him live with them but it didn't work out. He is now living at a friends house. He is still not working & I know he is using. He has been going to my parents for everything & getting money out of them by 1 bull story after another.......................I have told them both that that is what he is doing, but then he goes there & undoes everything I did.
I KNOW from coming here that I cannot control him or my parents but they are 90. My dad now has a pacemaker, he had a heart attack in Feb, and the stress of all of this is hurting him. I know he is selling it to get it & make money. I feel like going to the police or having him committed, just to protect my parents. I need some insight & some help as to what I should do.
Thank you for taking the time to read this, and insights would be appreciated.

laurie6781

I am sorry the Roller Coaster is still running in your neck of the woods.

You might want to check out the "Senior (Elder) Protective Services" that your state offers (I believe all states have this now). A social worker will interview you and your folks, see their condition and how they are getting on, etc. If the social worker 'suspects' problems they do have the right to get a protective order (restraining order) against the person 'harassing' the older folks.

That's all I can come up with right now.

However, please know that lots of prayers, love, and good thoughts are being sent right now to you from New Mexico.

Love and hugs,

dollydo

Hi,

I'm back, at least for awhile!

Sorry to hear that nothing has changed, no suprise to either one of us. Your parents should be placed in the Guiness Book Of World Records...the biggest enablers on the face of the earth. Such a shame that they just don't get it and never will.

To be honest, it won't be long before he puts himself back in prison, has to happen. It is just a matter of when. Maybe this time they will keep him long enough for your parents to live the rest of their life in peace, as long as he is out, they will continue to enable him. Just a fact.

To me, all you can do is keep your resolve, don't get caught up in all the drama, let the chips fall where they may.

I hope you and hubby are ok. Missed you!

As Ever,

Dolly

Impurrfect

(((Rozied))) - I'm so sorry he's up to the same old **** again, and that your parents are letting themselves get dragged down by him.

I can understand you wanting to call the cops on him, but not so sure they will do anything. I'm not saying they don't CARE, but I know a lot of cops and they are truly outnumbered in the "war against drugs".

((Laurie)) had a good suggestion, maybe try that?

I'm so sorry you're still dealing with this Big, big hugs and many prayers coming to you.

Amy

BBD

Hey Hon, I was going to ask "how are you" but thats apparent by your post. Lauries idea is great. There has to be some senior advocate in your area. Call them, explain the whole situation and see what happens. Sometimes its hard enough for all of us on this site...can you imagine being 90. I really think they positively don't get it....Keep in touch and hugs, Bonnie

rozied

WOW, I feel like I've come home. I feel so much better just reading the posts everyone left....................thank you all and thats a great idea to call Senior Services & see if I can get some help. I just want to protect my parents. My dad isn't well anymore & I know how upsetting it is for me at 63 & they are 90.
Bonnie, I sent you a private message as when I logged on there was 1 from you in my inbox.
Thanks again everyone,
Love,
Diane

Ann

Coming on late to give you a big hug and welcome you back, Rozied.:ghug3

I'm sorry he's showing bad behaviour again, but like the suggestion of getting a senior advocate involved.

Stick around, it's been a long road for you and many here and maybe some encouragement and support might help pick you up again.

Hugs

Spiritual Seeker

Diane,
Here you go again...oh dear. You can not have him committed unless he is threat to self or others and arrested only if caught in a crime...remember step one, you are powerless .

Is he actually abusing your folks in any way other than receiving money ? If there is abuse every court should have an elder abuse division that can assist w/ restraining order.

Maybe you can talk your parents into only a set allowance for your son as a compromise.

Serenity Bound

rozied, sending you hugs & prayers. I really liked Laurie's suggestion, in fact, I'm going to offer it to one of my program friends, as her mom seems to be in the same situation.

Freedom1990

Rozied! :ghug3 :ghug3

I agree with the suggestion of contacting the elderly protective services.

I'm sorry your son is back to the same old same old, but I am so glad to read you today! I have thought of you often, as I have a few others who haven't posted in a long time!