Update
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,691
Update
there are so many new faces and there are so many faces that I miss. I love it when people resurface and let us know how they are doing (yes, I mean Loves, Splendra, Funkster, Still Learning, Rosie, Dixie, and EVERYONE else).
I don't post as much as I used to but I still stop by daily. All of you are a part of my life. I have to admit that like Teke I have found the Arcade. Don't know if you guys know how brilliant she is and I want to be Teke when I grow up!
I am still working in the Trauma ICU as a physical therapist but...I am starting a Masters in Rehabilitation Counseling with a subspecialty in Substance Abuse Counseling in August (my focus will be on the Anon side). It is a two year program and will keep me really really busy as I work and raise 2 teenaged boys.
For now, I am still with my sober addict husband (don't know if we have initials for that one). He is coming up on 5 years of sobriety in July. For those that are new - he had a 20+ year addiction to crack. He rarely if ever goes to a meeting and definitely does not work a recovery program. It has been an extremely tough ride.
One of my boundaries 5 years ago was that I would only be with him if he was working a recovery program. I've been breaking that boundary now for 4 years. And I truly regret it. Clean and sober is one thing and recovery is definitely another. He was a man that I felt was my true soul mate - my life partner - my everything. Living with a sober addict has killed all of that though. We live parallel lives and there isn't a day that goes by where I am not thinking about my exit strategy. My sons are 3 years from graduating from high school and I am trying to hang in there until they leave for college.
My husband had a low bottom but so did I. I am still committed to my own recovery and will continue to say that every moment that I have spent on me and my recovery is more than worth it.
This May is my 5th year anniversary with SR. I so wish that I could reach out to that me from 5 years ago and help her to avoid the horrible pain and anguish of the last 5 years. Surely that is some really crazy kind of co dependent statement! The only thing that has been worth it is that it brought me into recovery and has allowed me to heal a lot of the "holes" that allowed me to fall in love with an addict in the first place. He wonders where I "went"....and I can truly say - that where I "went" was into the light.
Recovery has saved my life. I know that there is hope for me and that more will be revealed.
shine8pl:
I don't post as much as I used to but I still stop by daily. All of you are a part of my life. I have to admit that like Teke I have found the Arcade. Don't know if you guys know how brilliant she is and I want to be Teke when I grow up!
I am still working in the Trauma ICU as a physical therapist but...I am starting a Masters in Rehabilitation Counseling with a subspecialty in Substance Abuse Counseling in August (my focus will be on the Anon side). It is a two year program and will keep me really really busy as I work and raise 2 teenaged boys.
For now, I am still with my sober addict husband (don't know if we have initials for that one). He is coming up on 5 years of sobriety in July. For those that are new - he had a 20+ year addiction to crack. He rarely if ever goes to a meeting and definitely does not work a recovery program. It has been an extremely tough ride.
One of my boundaries 5 years ago was that I would only be with him if he was working a recovery program. I've been breaking that boundary now for 4 years. And I truly regret it. Clean and sober is one thing and recovery is definitely another. He was a man that I felt was my true soul mate - my life partner - my everything. Living with a sober addict has killed all of that though. We live parallel lives and there isn't a day that goes by where I am not thinking about my exit strategy. My sons are 3 years from graduating from high school and I am trying to hang in there until they leave for college.
My husband had a low bottom but so did I. I am still committed to my own recovery and will continue to say that every moment that I have spent on me and my recovery is more than worth it.
This May is my 5th year anniversary with SR. I so wish that I could reach out to that me from 5 years ago and help her to avoid the horrible pain and anguish of the last 5 years. Surely that is some really crazy kind of co dependent statement! The only thing that has been worth it is that it brought me into recovery and has allowed me to heal a lot of the "holes" that allowed me to fall in love with an addict in the first place. He wonders where I "went"....and I can truly say - that where I "went" was into the light.
Recovery has saved my life. I know that there is hope for me and that more will be revealed.
shine8pl:
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 325
Light, so darn nice to have you back, sharing that knowledge and experience!
I love how you put that!
I also found the darn arcade! And I agree with you- Teke, how the heck do you do it? Do you have any idea how many hours I spent on that darn mj solitaire?? Thinking to myself.. If Teke can, I can!! NOPE I can't... at least not today!
I was kinda wishing.. you were busy living that, happy, joyous and free life with your hubby. That may not be the case, but you dear- sound happy! Thanks for updating!
...has allowed me to heal a lot of the "holes" that allowed me to fall in love with an addict in the first place.
I also found the darn arcade! And I agree with you- Teke, how the heck do you do it? Do you have any idea how many hours I spent on that darn mj solitaire?? Thinking to myself.. If Teke can, I can!! NOPE I can't... at least not today!
I was kinda wishing.. you were busy living that, happy, joyous and free life with your hubby. That may not be the case, but you dear- sound happy! Thanks for updating!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Seeking Peace
Posts: 1,371
Lightseeker,
You sound great. You sound healthy and happy even if things aren't going according to plan with your sober ah.
I did this with my exah. Lived several years with an unrecovered addict. My boundaries slowly faded away. And then, out of the blue, he had surgery, was prescribed pain meds, and things went very bad in a very short amount of time.
I was angry at myself for not enforcing those boundaries. I was merely annoyed with myself before the big relapse and then downright furious with myself when the downward spiral began.
Be true to yourself lightseeker. You'll know what to do when the time is right...I have no doubts...and sometimes, doing nothing is an action.
Big hugs and happy mother's day to you. I've missed you !!
You sound great. You sound healthy and happy even if things aren't going according to plan with your sober ah.
One of my boundaries 5 years ago was that I would only be with him if he was working a recovery program. I've been breaking that boundary now for 4 years. And I truly regret it. Clean and sober is one thing and recovery is definitely another. He was a man that I felt was my true soul mate - my life partner - my everything. Living with a sober addict has killed all of that though. We live parallel lives and there isn't a day that goes by where I am not thinking about my exit strategy.
I was angry at myself for not enforcing those boundaries. I was merely annoyed with myself before the big relapse and then downright furious with myself when the downward spiral began.
Be true to yourself lightseeker. You'll know what to do when the time is right...I have no doubts...and sometimes, doing nothing is an action.
Big hugs and happy mother's day to you. I've missed you !!
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
Be true to yourself lightseeker. You'll know what to do when the time is right...I have no doubts...and sometimes, doing nothing is an action.
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