Abundance

he texted me saying he was going to email the boys.... and if I had given him the letter he wrote. I told him I hadn't .. and to keep that in mind in his email - as well as - their thinking he is in Ohio for work, one of the reasons that he went there. They know that we are over -but think we are still friends.

And so.. he was upset that I didn't give them the letter and that I didn't tell them the truth.

I told him the details.... and he replied back saying he misses us... wants to hold me... focus on the family....and he will have internet tomorrow.

So - I guess he didn't go back with his folks. I have no idea where he is - and I really don't want to know. I don't want to know anything about him.

now this is where i goofed up. I told him that he should have thought of those things when we he was able to do something about it - that I too had a lot of pain and had wanted those same things. That I'm sorry that it had to come to the point of me having enough for him to miss what he could have had ... and to stop contacting me... there is nothing more to say. Im done.

I wish so much that I would have done NOTHING.

gaaaawd


grrrrrrrrrrrrrr.... i wish i would have just let it be. I was too quick to text. I also called him and he didn't answer..... which is probably better for me.

Man ..... just when I was feeling so strong. I buckled.

Going to bed early tonight.... boys are with their dad tonight - so it's a mellow night.

First night on my own since he's been gone.