rozied

I went to visit my son Joey yesterday. It was the 1st time in like 9 months. Went ok but I still think he doesn't get it. Saying he learned his lesson & he'll never steal again, I said stealing is not the problem its the coke, if not for that you wouldn't be stealing. He also thinks he will be living with my parents. Till he earns back the family's trust we don't want him living with any of us. He has had more chances than anyone & that is part of the problem. He doesn't want to go to a Half Way house cuz he is tired of living with other men but it would be better for him. I pray my parents tell him the same thing. I know they really don't want him moving in.

Impurrfect

((Rozied)))

I'm glad you got to see him. I, too, hope your parents say "no" to him staying with them when he gets out, and I agree that a halfway house would be a better option, but you know your parents will make their own choice.

I will say extra prayers for you all.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

outtolunch

Your own recovery is showing. I know it was hard not to visit sooner.


If I recall, Joey is in his early 40's. Do I have this right? It's time for him to learn to stand on his own two feet. I am hoping the grandparents will give him the dignity to do so.

hope213

glad you went to see your son. i too hope your parents say no to him also. do u go to meetings? if u do maybe u can get your mom & dad to go. working together is the best thing to do. take care rozied, u r the most important thing. prayers,

Ann

Well done, Rozied. I'm glad it went okay. All that other stuff is just stuff and it's his stuff to deal with. I hope your folks say no, also.

Big hugs to you, I know this hasn't been an easy journey

MyJoey

I am so glad you got to see him. I wish you felt better about it, but only time will tell if he means what he is saying. I hope your parents don't let him stay with them, I just think it would be to much for them. Julie

greeteachday

((((Rozied))))

Spiritual Seeker

Nice to hear that you had a visit.
You have your boundaries firm. That's all you can do, the rest is up to him.
I bet your son apprec. the time with you.

hello-kitty

wow. I can't believe it's been 9 mos. If nothing changes, nothing changes - and I don't mean you. You really do seem to be shining in recovery. But him. It's too bad Rozied and I'm sorry things weren't more promising during your visit. I look at my ex and I see that even though he's not using drugs, he's still the same - irresponsible, unreliable person he was in active addiction. I guess it's better than nothing. At least he's not using. But it's not enough. An addict doesn't become "whole" when they quit using. They can still be a mess.

Thank God I've changed and I'm not trying to rely on him to get "recovered". Otherwise my world would still be a shambles and he still wouldn't be capable of fixing it.

There's always hope though. As long as we keep doing the right thing, we can always has hope that they will "get it" someday.

rozied

Thank you everyone. He is now 42 & will be 43 in Sept. I KNOW my dad is firm about not letting him live there. They are both 89 & since Jan 7th my dad has a pace maker so I don't want him to be under alot of stress and with Joey living there thats what would happen. I know if my dad should pass first my mom would let him move in so she wouldn't have to live alone.
Joey more or less was telling me he didn't want to go to a half way house cuz he was tired of living with alot of men............well thats too bad but I think its what he needs.
I know where he goes or what he does at 42 is none of my business. I really want my whole family to keep hands off and let Joey work out what he wants to do. Its the only way he will ever mature.