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Recieved A Letter From My Son

Old 04-09-2009, 03:40 PM
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rozied
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Recieved A Letter From My Son

Yesterday I finally got a letter from Joey. He said he had been worried about me because he hadn't heard from me. He then went on to say he was ashamed of all the things he had done, and that was another reason he hadn't written. He said he had 2 addictions gambling & coke. He said he understood me distancing myself from him. He said if it was his children he also would be brokenhearted. He then went on to say his addictions & incarcerations had crippled his relationship with his brother & I.
This was the first time I recieved a decent letter from him. A letter where he admits he has problems.
I am going to write him back to tell him that it is all up to him. He doesn't have to be hopeless because there is help available. I love him so much and once I see he is helping himself I will be there. Right now all I can do is pray that he has finally seen the light.
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Old 04-09-2009, 03:42 PM
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I'm so happy for you, Rozied. I'm sure that really made your heart soar.
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Old 04-09-2009, 04:06 PM
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Thanx Suki, I was very happy to hear from him.
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Old 04-09-2009, 04:10 PM
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Rozied
I think it is always good when we finally hear our loved ones admit what we knew to be true. I hope he continues on the path that he is on.

Gotahavfaith
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Old 04-09-2009, 04:22 PM
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I would just love to see a few of our Joey's getting it!!! I am happy for you. Julie
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Old 04-09-2009, 04:24 PM
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rozied
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Thanx Julie, I don't know if my son has " got it " but I do know this is the 1st letter in a long time that he is talking sense.
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Old 04-09-2009, 05:35 PM
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Admittance is the first step. I'm so happy that he shared that with you. Praying that he continues on the road to recovery.

Hugs,
Chris
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Old 04-09-2009, 05:57 PM
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Thanks Chris, Sending you a hug too. There is not a person here that can't use one.
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Old 04-09-2009, 06:25 PM
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I'm glad he is not in denial, Diane. It sounds as if you were honest with him and let him know that although you love him, you can not stand by and watch him destroy himself. As a result, he is being more honest with you. I love you enough to let you figure this out for yourself is a good message for our kids to hear. Hugs
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Old 04-09-2009, 06:59 PM
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Happy to hear this news. It's certainly an important step for you both.
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Old 04-09-2009, 07:09 PM
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Your son knows he has problems and knows it is up to him.
But maybe now he is willing to climb out of his hole and do whatever it takes.

The letter gives hope that perhaps it won't always be this way. The son under the addiction wrote you the letter.The son you raised is still there...may he slowly emerge
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Old 04-09-2009, 07:39 PM
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Sounds wonderful to me Rozied. All you can do is "be there: and HOPE that he is getting it. I pray that that is whats going on with him. It does take a while but most of these boys do come around at some point. I wonder if its when we stop enabling or if its just their time to grow up and face life.....I'm sooo happy for you and your family. We're doing great here and its so nice to relax and start enjoying life for a change....Big hugs, Bonnnie
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Old 04-09-2009, 09:01 PM
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A letter where he admits he has problems.
This is good, and a sign of the heart softening, and honesty. I'm glad you heard from him in this way. Is he attending a program in there?
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Old 04-09-2009, 11:41 PM
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Hi Rozied

Well, that's sure a step in the right direction huh?

I'll keep the prayers coming that he knows he has a problem, and gets help to fix it.

Hugs & Prayers,
Devastated
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Old 04-10-2009, 02:17 AM
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Just a thought, but why not start off your letter by telling him you love him and how much it ment to you for being so honest in his letter. That it seems so much more settling and understandable as to what has been going on. Not that it is no big deal but at least he is trying to communicate and still we have to read between the lines.

Know where in the book does it say we can not be understanding, but that is where our recovery comes into place to not be taken, plus it gives us a real good look at where we are in recovery.

Just my belief, but I think our recovery is just as challenging as an addict's recovery...we both have challenging times and when do we both know when we are in a safe ground.

I myself don't think I would respond to his letter in a challenging way....

Rose
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Old 04-10-2009, 05:55 AM
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Sounds like a move in the right direction!

Mom hugs. (Seems I'm giving a lot of mom hugs lately...)
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Old 04-11-2009, 01:46 AM
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Thanks Everyone for all the input. Needinghelp, I don't know if he is in a program BUT I will ask him when I write.
Rose, That is a great way to answer him. I will take your advice. I will send him nothing but love and will not be challenging at all. I plan on visiting him soon.
I hope everyone has a nice holiday be it Easter or Passover.
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Old 04-11-2009, 01:55 AM
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he was worried about YOU because he hadn't heard from YOU? Imagine that! I would have been so tempted to get all sarcastic back at him. Were you? but really, that sounds like a good letter. it's always a miracle when anyone (addict or not) admits their own stuff and takes responsibility for it, IMO.
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Old 04-12-2009, 07:51 AM
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Dear Sleepygoat, No I wasn't sarcastic back. I was so happy to hear from him & to hear him being honest, that I wrote him back sending nothing but love. He has a very long way to go though. He has almost 9 more months to spend in jail. I hope he uses that time to do some serious thinking about what he's going to do when he gets out. But again it is all up to him.
Diane
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