lost for words
Standing by his side
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: baltimore md.
Posts: 32
lost for words
I have a boyfriend that is not only a addict but he is also bi polor. i understand the bi polor part of his illiness. but the addiction part i have a problem with. i know for years he has self medicated. why didn't someone see this when he was growing up? teachers, parents? friends? if he is on meds why does he use drugs? i know his mother and father fed his addiction with drugs. they just fed him drugs all he had to do is ask they freely gave. are they to blame? is anyone to blame really? or is it the ilinesses faught?
how does someone stay sober. what do i do to keep him sobor? i sometimes feel lost for words things to say to keep him on the straight and norrow path to pass another month being sober. i want to run away sometimes and just be done i could live a peaceful life without him in it. but i stop and say i cant do that because not only do i love him but i cant just walk away from the pain i feel that comes from him trying to get though the day. i know when he hurts i know when he craves. i think i know before he does. i can't run because i yearn for the day he is well and sober. sometimes i just dont have to words of courage and support, thank you for listening.
how does someone stay sober. what do i do to keep him sobor? i sometimes feel lost for words things to say to keep him on the straight and norrow path to pass another month being sober. i want to run away sometimes and just be done i could live a peaceful life without him in it. but i stop and say i cant do that because not only do i love him but i cant just walk away from the pain i feel that comes from him trying to get though the day. i know when he hurts i know when he craves. i think i know before he does. i can't run because i yearn for the day he is well and sober. sometimes i just dont have to words of courage and support, thank you for listening.
let it grow!
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 15,540
nice to meet you, janet1965. my daughter is an alcoholic/addict, so i can relate to a lot of what you are feeling. have you thought about going to alanon meetings in your community? they really help me.
the 3 c's of alanon:
you didn't cause your loved one's addiction.
you can't cure your loved one's addiction.
you cannot control your loved one's addiction.
you do have choices, though, on how you allow it to affect your life.
keep reaching out! and be sure to check out the friends and family section here at sr as well.
hugs, k
the 3 c's of alanon:
you didn't cause your loved one's addiction.
you can't cure your loved one's addiction.
you cannot control your loved one's addiction.
you do have choices, though, on how you allow it to affect your life.
keep reaching out! and be sure to check out the friends and family section here at sr as well.
hugs, k
Standing by his side
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: baltimore md.
Posts: 32
yes i have but i work 2nd shift and its tough for me to go to meetings. thats why i came here. i can come here while i am at work. i am researching for meetings on weekends. hoping my boyfriend follows and goes to meetings, therapy. thank you!!!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Baltimore is a pretty big place. Here in Mobile they have over 400 meetings a week anywhere from 6:30am to 10pm. I know lots of people on 2nd shift that make it to meetings. I have to believe you have 5 times as many meetings as we do.
Bottom line, if a meeting is important to you, there is one available.
However as stated earlier you cannot make your BF attend meetings, he has to want this for himself. You going to meetings and casually letting him know that you are going will likely have the opposite effect of what you desire - unless he is ready, in which case you don't need to do anything.
Bottom line, if a meeting is important to you, there is one available.
However as stated earlier you cannot make your BF attend meetings, he has to want this for himself. You going to meetings and casually letting him know that you are going will likely have the opposite effect of what you desire - unless he is ready, in which case you don't need to do anything.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Home of the Ravens-MD
Posts: 1,316
Janet, I do know that there are lots & lots of meetings in Balto. I live in Harford County and have gone to meetings in Balto when I can't find one close by me.
My daughter is alcoholic/addict.... she is also bi-polar. She went to therapists for years & years, wasn't diagnosed til maybe 4 yrs ago. (she' 30)
Besides Nar-anon & Ala-non meetings there is also a support group for bi-polar, both those with the disorder and their families. I'm not sure what part of Balto you live in...however, if you would like more info on this....just PM me. Both my AD & I have gone.
Hugs,
Chris
My daughter is alcoholic/addict.... she is also bi-polar. She went to therapists for years & years, wasn't diagnosed til maybe 4 yrs ago. (she' 30)
Besides Nar-anon & Ala-non meetings there is also a support group for bi-polar, both those with the disorder and their families. I'm not sure what part of Balto you live in...however, if you would like more info on this....just PM me. Both my AD & I have gone.
Hugs,
Chris
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
