Need Advice Please
Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 328
No is a complete sentence.
The first time is the hardest.
Use the three Bs (when you have to say something tough):
Be kind
Be brief
Be gone
(Say it in a nice way with a few words and then walk out the door!)
I do so remember these very hard days. I really thought I was going to die if I stood up to the addicts in my family. After awhile, they stopped asking because they knew what the answer was.
Good luck!
Love in recovery,
Jody Hepler
The first time is the hardest.
Use the three Bs (when you have to say something tough):
Be kind
Be brief
Be gone
(Say it in a nice way with a few words and then walk out the door!)
I do so remember these very hard days. I really thought I was going to die if I stood up to the addicts in my family. After awhile, they stopped asking because they knew what the answer was.
Good luck!
Love in recovery,
Jody Hepler
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,307
I like the 3 B's!
I'm glad you have found SR stop stop! I know it has been such a great place for me too!
One thing is though through the support.... there is not a lot of hand holding feeling sorry for yourself type thinking.... it's about picking yourself up..... brushing yourself off.... and learning to love yourself!
When dealing with loved ones with addicts.... we have to remember.. .it's not them that we are dealing with, but the drug that is running them. If they don't stand a chance against it... how can we? So .... I guess what I'm saying... is that it's the drug that we are standing up against..... and the best power we have with that is to take care of ourselves as much as possible and not let their DOC bring us down...... ya know?
Hope it went okay tonight .... remember to take each day as it comes.... and while at the same time..... staying true to YOURSELF.
Addiction and Recovery are totally different. You are FREE to be in recovery..... and you go girl!!!!!!!
You'll learn these ropes via the SR board, the books that are available and most of all the meetings! And best of all.... you aren't alone.... so many here know what you have been and are going through .... and will support you to be the best that you can be.... for YOU!
I'm glad you have found SR stop stop! I know it has been such a great place for me too!
One thing is though through the support.... there is not a lot of hand holding feeling sorry for yourself type thinking.... it's about picking yourself up..... brushing yourself off.... and learning to love yourself!
When dealing with loved ones with addicts.... we have to remember.. .it's not them that we are dealing with, but the drug that is running them. If they don't stand a chance against it... how can we? So .... I guess what I'm saying... is that it's the drug that we are standing up against..... and the best power we have with that is to take care of ourselves as much as possible and not let their DOC bring us down...... ya know?
Hope it went okay tonight .... remember to take each day as it comes.... and while at the same time..... staying true to YOURSELF.
Addiction and Recovery are totally different. You are FREE to be in recovery..... and you go girl!!!!!!!
You'll learn these ropes via the SR board, the books that are available and most of all the meetings! And best of all.... you aren't alone.... so many here know what you have been and are going through .... and will support you to be the best that you can be.... for YOU!
Let It Begin With ME
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Saint Clair Shores, MI
Posts: 42
Well, he asked about the the money again. I didn't say I wasnt giving it to him, but I told him I already gave him that money and he choose to use it for drugs. He starts saying "this will be the last time..quack, quack"... and "If I don't pay the clinic, I'll get really sick...quack, quack"...and "then I'll have to get vicodin to keep from getting sick...quack, quack"... I then told him that the bill money is bill money, and I shouldn't have to decide whether to pay for his drugs or pay the bills. "but this will be the last time...quack, quack"...Finally I just said "QUACK! QUACK"!!! He said "what"? I said "If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, well... then it must be a duck". Then I walked away. I know hes not done, he'll be back with more BS tomorrow! Hes basically trying to make me feel that it will be my fault if he gets deathly ill. and it will be my fault if he has to get vicodin.. I'm not buyin it! He had a choice. I will give him 80. a week, and no more! He can do with it what he chooses. :chatter "What"? "I cant seem to hear you"
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: twilight zone,usa
Posts: 3,909
honey, you are already one month behind on the house. it will be two & three & then you will b on the street. stop, stop, stop right now & take care of you. if he keeps getting high he will not b around to worry about where he will live. it will b rehab, prison or the morgue. it only gets worse. learn to say no to him now. prayers are for you & him both.hugs,
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
