walkingtheline

and did not react at all.

I came in from the grocery store, he was on the phone with his best friend. It was interesting to hear him tell the story.

According to him I don't want him anymore because I have a good job and don't need him financially. He clearly said, "No, my drinking has nothing to do with it, she don't care about that, she's got money and new teeth and she's wanting to step up."

He also did his litany of ALL he's done for me...he even included "I take out the trash". hahaha

Never mentioned the night after night of yelling, the blackouts, the gone every holiday, the gone overnight with no explanations, wrecked car, unpaid bills left for me to pay, the weekends of nonstop drinking with no shower...ect ect.

When he hung up he said, "I have the right to tell Walt what's really up instead of your bull**it." I kept putting things away.

My hope is if he's telling his friends, maybe he WILL leave.

FormerDoormat

Of course he didn't. "You forced him to drink by nagging him, so it's all your fault." It's called denial. And he's certainly a pro at it. Good for your for not reacting to this. I'm sure his best friend sees through this BS.

Keep up the good work, you're doing great.

JessicaNAJ

They have a nact for making us look like the bad guy - again, that takes the blame off of them. You know that truth about the situation and that's all that matters.

Good for you for not reacting - now that's recovery in progress!!

msmetal

Yes they do have that knack. Fortunately we can be aware of it and not take it personally. I have to constantly remind myself that it's about me, it's about what he's choosing not to see in himself.

DefofLov

Great big hugs to you for not biting his line! I am so proud of you for that.

Alcoholic or not, when someone dumps someone, the person who got dumped is a lot less likely to tell their dirt. Many people have a tendency to demonize the dumper.

When I ended a friendship, that person went to my other friends and told all kinds of bold faced lies to prevent herself from looking like a real jack@ss. So, when I end a friendship or relationship, I expect the person to not tell the truth about what happened, to have their own side to the story, and to maybe even demonize me.

((hugs))

LovingMom

Way to go on note taking the bait!! It's almost the most natural thing in the world for him to put his spin on the facts. Cause that's exactly the way he sees things. For it to be otherwise would mean that he would have to own the truth. The missed life that he could have had with you if he could have/would have gotten help.

You did really well with just keeping on with your chores. By now he has got to be wondering why he didn't get your "correct" reaction.

Hugs to you my dear...you deserve them.