VigilanceNow

So I can add a bit here, though I'll preface it by saying that every person is different and their body's reaction can only be evaluated by a doctor.

I felt myself go through phases with alcoholism. When I was in my early 20s, I could drink like no tomorrow on the weekends, but have no desire to do so during the week. I realized recently that I've never been able to drink "nomrally"; enjoying a glass of wine means I want to get drunk. This evolved as I continued to deny I had a problem. I stopped snapping back as quickly. My former "normal" hangovers were turning into withdrawal, and I didn't see it coming. My standards for an "okay night" completely shifted; suddenly not embarrassing myself in public and peeing all over everything meant a "good night", a kind of messed up metric only an alcoholic would consider normal.

In terms of physical health, I had my first withdrawal at 28 (I'm 33 now) where I landed myself in the hospital and couldn't even feed myself without violent shakes and tremors. I literally did not know alcohol could do that (despite having seen people shaking on the streets holding bottles in paper bags; I assumed it was heroin or something).

I mean, I can still bike 30 miles when I'm being MYSELF, which is healthy and active. As soon as I pick up a drink, however, it takes days for the physical effects to wear off, and I'm always terrified that withdrawal will give me a seizure. This is even if I somehow manage to "moderate" and not drink a full bottle of vodka in one go.

Most people need help to detox from alcohol or it gets to such a scary level that they end up drinking again just to feel less body shock. He should probably enter a rehab where he can detox fully and safely and explore the reasons he drinks to that level. Do you think he'd be open to this? Sounds like he's admitted to you that he has a serious problem and is aware of it... could be a good start!

csips

He goes in and out of agreeing he has a problem. I've tried to get him into treatment, rehab, counseling the whole thing. He just isn't ready and doesn't want to do it sadly. Even when it meant losing me.

thequest

Here the alcoholic lasted a little over 3 decades before requiring medical treatment and/or prescriptions for alcohol and other substance abuse. The problem is they still drink and doing at least 3 different prescriptions a day some of which can be hard on the kidneys of a sober person. If other medical issues pop they run to their doctor friend and get even more drugs that have potential consequences. So some days they do alcohol, their daily routine prescriptions and/or additional drugs for their ailments.

Mentally/mature wise they are half century old adult acting like an angry teen or adult acting like teen who is acting like an adult.

I've seen people make into to gray hair territory on a bunch of issues/problems and after a decade or two many get cocky think they're immune, not me syndrome etc. The longer things go on without changes the more that behavior and routine becomes part of their life. It's not just about the substance alone after a certain point. Sometimes by the time they get blatant physical symptoms or signs it's too late, the damage is done. It will take it's toll physically and socially/on friends and family. There will be a point of no return for the body and mind.

If they make into rehab and start right back up again after at least that's a time out for the body and the seeds of change have been planted in their mind.

Milano58

[QUOTE=Sasha1972;7238565]My ex died in May at 55 after heavy drinking since he was in his teens. In the early years it was episodic (could go for months as a "normal" drinker in between periods of intense drinking) - the episodes gradually got closer and closer together and the amount of alcohol consumed went up and up.

You've just described my EXAH.. you'd almost think he was normal until bam.. Gets drunk, arrested, dragged out of river. Rinse, repeat for years.

​​​​​​Honestly, for some it won't be liver disease, it'll be some dumb accident. Or falling asleep out in the cold.

Trinity7777

I wonder the same thing. I guess only time will tell! My XABF was drinking well over a liter of vodka a day and doing cocaine (and who knows what else) daily when I finally woke up and dumped him 3 months ago. He is 35, been drinking/drugging heavily since 16. His health is atrocious. When I left he was passing blood daily, had a horrific wracking cough, excessive sweating, constant shakes, hallucinations, bloating, a terrible smell, unexplainable bruising and lumps all over, uncontrollable vomiting with exertion and/or anxiety, no appetite for anything but alcohol, teeth falling out, fingers curling up, etc. etc. And that's not even going into the horrific psychological symptoms he has. No one really expects him to see 40, but you just never know. It's just terrible. I hate addiction.