sharing e, s, & h
Living in a Pinkful Place
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 7,545
sharing e, s, & h
August 14, 1992 - I married my now ex AH. I was so clueless of what living with an active alcoholic/addict was going to be like. . .
The night before our wedding, I received my first call from the State Police asking me to come pick him up at the station (it definitely was not the last). He had "fallen asleep" at a traffic light - honestly he was under the influence of a large amount of prescription drugs
It was the 3rd time I saw him "under the influence" that heavily. He was basically incoherent.
You know that 3rd strike your out . . . I probably should have went with that. . . but I was untreated al-anon and had no tools to process or protect myself or my girls.
I couldn't back out of the wedding - geez people might know??? what would people say??? how would I endure the shame?? I know now that shame was not mine to carry.
Today, as I walk through life, not a perfect life, but a life with tools to process pain, joy, disappointments, challenges, and healthier choices - I know that as much as I regret the decision to marry my ex AH, it is part of my story. I would have never found al-anon, recovery, the God of my understanding, and this pinkful life I have today, if I had the strength to stop that wedding.
So we can't go back, but we can make healthy decisions for what is best for ourselves and our children.
Maybe this rambled a little but I just felt like sharing it's never too late to make a healthy decision even if no one else understands.
Don't worry about what "they" say - "they" will say what they want & then go on to someone else -
Don't give up before the miracles happen in you - you deserve it.
PINK HUGS (hope, unity, gratitude & serenity)
The night before our wedding, I received my first call from the State Police asking me to come pick him up at the station (it definitely was not the last). He had "fallen asleep" at a traffic light - honestly he was under the influence of a large amount of prescription drugs
It was the 3rd time I saw him "under the influence" that heavily. He was basically incoherent.
You know that 3rd strike your out . . . I probably should have went with that. . . but I was untreated al-anon and had no tools to process or protect myself or my girls.
I couldn't back out of the wedding - geez people might know??? what would people say??? how would I endure the shame?? I know now that shame was not mine to carry.
Today, as I walk through life, not a perfect life, but a life with tools to process pain, joy, disappointments, challenges, and healthier choices - I know that as much as I regret the decision to marry my ex AH, it is part of my story. I would have never found al-anon, recovery, the God of my understanding, and this pinkful life I have today, if I had the strength to stop that wedding.
So we can't go back, but we can make healthy decisions for what is best for ourselves and our children.
Maybe this rambled a little but I just felt like sharing it's never too late to make a healthy decision even if no one else understands.
Don't worry about what "they" say - "they" will say what they want & then go on to someone else -
Don't give up before the miracles happen in you - you deserve it.
PINK HUGS (hope, unity, gratitude & serenity)
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,240
Thank you my Louisiana Friend
for sharing. In doing so, it may
help someone going thru the
same similar thing as you and
find strength and hope to have
the courage to change what they
can and the wisdom to know the
difference.
Glad to hear that you are well today.
for sharing. In doing so, it may
help someone going thru the
same similar thing as you and
find strength and hope to have
the courage to change what they
can and the wisdom to know the
difference.
Glad to hear that you are well today.
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