SparkleKitty

Oh jarp, I know there isn't much solace in this but I am encouraged by the fact that your son can admit that he is sad and is allowing himself to feel those feelings, even if he won't talk further about it. I have such strong memories of stuffing my own feelings in order to keep up the appearance that everything was fine and not rocking the boat. And I am especially encouraged that he has one parent who demonstrates that it is not okay for the world to revolve around protecting the alcoholic. You are doing good, jarp, and these choices will be reflected back in your son in the years to come.

9111111

It might not hurt to have the police do a welfare check, and then put the focus back on yourself and the little one.

Here's a link I found quite helpful for the little ones, maybe worth checking out
Children of Parents with a Mental Illness: mental health information and resources for Australian parents, children, families, carers and health professionals.

LexieCat

The "I'm going to drink myself to death" sounds like pure manipulation. Even if he continues to drink, it could be a very long time before he manages to kill himself that way. You'd have to have someone checking on him every few days. The cops aren't going to do that.

I'm sorry for your and your son's pain right now, but I think you are sparing both of you much more pain that would come as a result of having a front-row seat to this disaster.

Hugs, you're doing good!

hopeful4

Hugs to you Jarp.

You have not heard the last of him obviously. As Lexie said, it could take quite some time before he gets as bad as he says he is going to get. He has resources, it is up to him to reach out to them.

I am sorry. I am sure your son is hurting, and there is nothing in life more awful than seeing your child hurt. You are one great momma, and will help him through this. That will shine on in him for years to come.

Much love my friend! XXX

jjj111

Jarp, I'm so sorry for what you're going through. As an adult child of alcoholics, I am always inspired by parents who summon up the courage to create a sober home for their children.

About the threats, I remember from your older posts that he has a history of suicide threats/attempts. This "I'm going to drink myself to death" might not be a specific enough threat, but if he does make a more specific threat, it might be a good idea to call for a welfare check every time. Maybe that way he wil learn that he can't make threats just to manipulate you without dealing with police knocking on his door?

Refiner

I know it hurts to see your son hurting right now, but this too shall pass. I'm SO glad the AH is OUT. I'm guessing his inheritance may take awhile to get especially if he's the executor, it may never get done. Who's paying to keep the lights on at ole Dad's house? Who's paying for his booze and food?

jarp

Thank you, that's a great resource!!

He's multi diagnosis as well so it's triple useful. I liked some of the conversation tips and starters. Itight be easier to draw ds out that way.

He down loaded a 'lie detector' iPad app yesterday and I caught him last night asking it over and over if 'daddy loved' him...

Refiner

OMG that is heartbreaking!

FeelingGreat

Jarp, that's heartbreaking. It's fantastic that he has a mother who's aware and proactive.

hopeful4

And crack goes your heart. Oh sweetie, stay strong and know that you are your little guys rock, and it will show for years to come. My heart is with you. XXX