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Crisis resolved (and mostly without any help from me)

Old 07-01-2015, 03:47 AM
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Crisis resolved (and mostly without any help from me)

I got another one of "those calls" from my first husband yesterday morning (he knows I work at home, so calls at that time often are not good news). Our older son (the one whose g/f had the meltdown recently) apparently couldn't resist taking a look at his dad's personal stuff on a laptop he'd briefly left at the apartment when he was trying to help with the crisis and apparently stumbled on some communications with other people that were meant to be private. Son (who is coping with g/f's crisis) didn't take it well, and said some absolutely horrible things to his dad. Dad is having his own emotional lows right now, so he was feeling very down about it all (not to mention rightfully angry at the snooping). So I listened and talked to Dad, and a couple of hours later he emailed me to say Son had called to apologize. Later that evening I saw Son had texted me the night before asking if I was still up (I wasn't, and the fact that it took me almost a full day to notice he had texted indicates how little I use text messaging). So I texted back, said I was sorry I missed the text the night before, and I'd be glad to talk if he wanted to. He replied, "Nah, I'm OK now, has just been a rough couple of weeks." I told him to call me anytime (and reminded him of the best way to reach me), and he thanked me.

So anyway, once again I see that the universe handles things just right without my help. I think I might have done some good helping Dad get his head back in a better place, but I'm very glad those two worked out the problem. Dad tells me Son was receptive to idea of seeking some help through his EAP at work, and possibly Al-Anon (since OA apparently doesn't have a similar family support program).

Whew. I'm very relieved and grateful. I had a feeling this would pass, but thought it might take a few weeks or months before it did. Proud of Son for realizing how hurtful he was and doing the right thing immediately, and proud of Dad for accepting the apology and doing what he needs to do to address his own situation right now. Obviously this isn't the end of the story--but at least this particular crisis is resolved for now.
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Old 07-01-2015, 09:36 AM
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This is a great reminder for me that the world won't fall apart without my input! WHY is it so hard to remember that sometimes?!
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Old 07-01-2015, 10:04 AM
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A great reminder indeed!

Beautiful share - thank you!
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Old 07-01-2015, 11:16 AM
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Dang kids and their snooping.

I think this is a great share, thank you!
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Old 07-01-2015, 11:31 AM
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LOL, hopeful, you can bet that your experience with snoopy kids was one of the first things that leaped to mind. My "kid" is almost 29, though. I did tell his dad that one of the things he had to learn is that when you snoop where you don't belong you sometimes find things you'd be happier not knowing. The other thing that offended his dad was that Dad had the laptop over there in the first place to help him research resources to help Son and g/f.

As someone who has, herself, snooped with unhappy results, this isn't a bad lesson to learn.
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Old 07-01-2015, 12:52 PM
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Ohhhh Yes!

We all know that my children have found out WAY too much info by being snoops. It doesn't really matter the age does it?! I will say, they learned their lesson I do believe, they don't snoop anymore, that I know of, LOL. Of course, being that they are currently not seeing nor speaking to their father they are not given much opportunity. Sadly, I am a bore, so they would have no reason to snoop on me!!!!
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Old 07-01-2015, 12:58 PM
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This makes my heart smile. For you, for your son, and for your ex.
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