Flicka57

I saw so many threads lately where our A's seem to be stomping all over us and we are left reeling. Below is a section from a book called "Toxic InLaws" and I hope this helps someone today as it did me to recognize I do have certain rights that were being violated. Although it is focused on problems with inlaws it applies to A's as well. Tell me your thoughts--with me it opened my eyes like "well yes of course I have these rights but my god I was letting him violate these simple things and taking it!":

"Your Rights as a Person
You have the right:
- To protect your own physical and emotional health
- To be treated with respect
- To express your own beliefs, feeling, opinions, convictions, values, and
traditions
- To get angry
- To raise your children without interference
- To make mistakes
- To change your mind
- To have time with your own parents, partner, and children, independent of
your in-laws
- To be taken seriously

Your Rights with your Partner
You have the right:
- To work with your partner to set the guidelines for your household and
have them honored
- To ask your partner for help and support with in-law problems
- To protest to your partner when your in-laws are causing you unhappiness
or being overly critical, controlling, or otherwise difficult
- To expect your partner to put you first
- To ask your partner to join you in some kind of counseling if things get
really bad between you

Your Rights with Your In-Laws
You have the right:
- To say "no"
- To disagree
- To not love them
- To let them know when they've hurt, offended, or mistreated you
- To ask them to stay out of problems between you and your partner
- To ask for what you would like from them
- To set limits on how much time you spend with them
- To take an active part in the decisions about how the holidays and other
special occasions are celebrated"