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to listen to voice mail??

Old 10-26-2012, 05:24 PM
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Unhappy to listen to voice mail??

I have been NC from axbf for 7 days. I blocked him on my email and phone. I blissfully heard no quacking for 7 days as a result allowing me to ,educate and immerse myself in codie recovery. Appearently blocking on my phone means it goes to VM and my phone does not ring when he calls, just chimes that I have VM. Does not block completely. He simply made no phone attempts (shocking as he is a huge drunk dialer) for the past week. I now have 2 messages I have not listened to and the temptation is great to do so. Do I listen or simply erase?
I began working Al Anon steps 1 and 2 today and am feeling rather strong as a result but fear hearing his voice either sober or drunk may set me back. This should be a no brainer if I am truely committed to erasing him from my life. I will at some point have to email him over loose ends type things but am postponing that now as well. Any thoughts???
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Old 10-26-2012, 05:34 PM
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Erase.
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Old 10-26-2012, 05:58 PM
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Thanks akalacha!
After enjoying some brie in drama free peace I was leaning that way myself. No brainer, this guy is a nightmare of narcissistic manipulation who I am powerless against. Done deal, not going back to square one and the acute searing pain of being used as a resource.
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Old 10-26-2012, 06:35 PM
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Learning new behaviors was so very hard for me! Believe me, each time you delete VM's, it will get easier, dear.

Sending you hugs of support.
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Old 10-26-2012, 06:44 PM
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Originally Posted by Freedom1990 View Post
Learning new behaviors was so very hard for me! Believe me, each time you delete VM's, it will get easier, dear.

Sending you hugs of support.
Thank you so much, this site has been a godsend and I am planning face to face AlAnon meeting this coming week, hopefully find a sponser, meantime working the steps on here, slowly and deliberately. BTW, erased and did not listen to a word of quackery!!!! Feeling strangely fine. Love you guys.
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Old 10-26-2012, 06:47 PM
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Delete that message it will only make it more difficult for you.
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Old 10-26-2012, 06:49 PM
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Did you listen or erase?
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Old 10-26-2012, 07:57 PM
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Oh wow, you erased it?!? I soooo look forward to having that kind of strength! Good for you!
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Old 10-26-2012, 08:24 PM
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erased it like it was poison

Rather good day today, I just might make it..........
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Old 10-27-2012, 08:05 AM
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update my sb saviors

Originally Posted by freeatlast1313 View Post
Thank you so much, this site has been a godsend and I am planning face to face AlAnon meeting this coming week, hopefully find a sponser, meantime working the steps on here, slowly and deliberately. BTW, erased and did not listen to a word of quackery!!!! Feeling strangely fine. Love you guys.
Hi All,
Woke up feeling better today than I have in weeks, no bad dreams, slept well, no anxiety or obsessive SR reading. Been back to my usual Saturday morning routines of preparing for the work week ahead ( I am a 3rd shift healthcare worker Sunday-Wednesday, physically and mentally stressful job, 12 hour shifts).
I DID just notice I now have 2 more voicemails from axbf to erase. Not really bothering me like the ones last night, will erase at some point today.

Definately progressing due to immersion in reading SR and all things alanon ( beginning to really study step1 and 2). My next goal is to continue daily SR , live AlAnon as well as the readings on here BUT the obsessive energy I have been putting into my exabf mental exorcism needs to be Part of a healthy day, not just my only activity as it has been for the last week. Progression? We shall see. At least that insane, all consuming feeling is gone for now. What a beatiful thing.
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